Zilla - WWW2001 Winter

Zilla trip report December 5 - 16th  

Getting There

As far as I can tell, there is no real difference to any of the major airlines that fly into Montego Bay from the States. Some force a stop, some are straight through, but they all seem to get there, and none of the airlines have my allegiance. We chose Air Jamaica from Chicago this time to get ourselves maximum Hedo Time for our vacation. It got us there.  

We did fly TimAir from MoBay to Negril. It was my first time for that. I LOVED IT! While it almost became a game trying to keep up with all the people who moved our bags, the flight itself was amazing. We had an adorable, friendly pilot. The view from the air was spectacular. I would definitely choose to take a puddle jumper over to Negril again. The bus is fine, but the puddle jumper is FUN.  

Recipe for relaxation

In general, there were very few days that varied from the above recipe, and that was just the way I wanted it.  

I did venture out of the Tourist Prison twice, both times with large groups of WWWers, so it hardly counts. I enjoyed both of the outings immensely (the Catamaran Cruise and the Magical Mystery Tour ... Go NUDE Bus Go!), but I don't feel like I got to see much of the island or its ways. My favorite part of the Magical Mystery Tour (besides the lap dancing, nudity, and general frivolity) was going into the grocery store. I don't know what my fascination is with grocery stores, and the exotic things that other people consider staples for their diet, but I do know that I adore wandering through them anytime I am out of my own hometown. The grocery store I saw in Jamaica was charming. And seeing the prices in Jamaican dollars is certainly worth some internal giggling. $37 for ramen noodles!  

"It's the People"

For me, this trip was about getting a mental break from work and meeting all the people I had bickered, agreed, and commiserated with on the message board. While I expected to like just about everyone (because that is my nature) what I didn't expect was the good natured acceptance from EVERYONE I met. Perhaps the people who really dislike my message board persona just stayed far far away from me. I went from being a girl who expected  burning Zilla effigies, to someone who didn't think twice about whether her opinion would be accepted. Silly me, it really isn't any different on the board, but trust me when I tell you the trepidation was there. So, for everyone who met me, please know in your heart of hearts that I thought you were lovely and amusing. I think often of all the people I met. And for my special group of darlings (you know who you are), please know that I will do everything in my power to keep in touch and keep the magic alive for us. Your friendships truly made my trip extra special.  

I'm not going to name off a bunch of names, because invariably I would forget someone who was truly special, and that would hurt their feelings. But I would like to make mention of two very special individuals. I would like to tell Danimal that he is one of my heroes. Danimal has a slight fear of swimming in the ocean, but during the cat cruise on Wednesday, he gamely entered the water to play with the rest of us. I thought this was one of the bravest things that I had seen, but then he did something even more amazing. During the first stop, the water got VERY choppy and rough. Even the experienced swimmers were working hard to keep their heads above water, and unfortunately Danimal's fear overcame him and he quickly got back into the boat, but THEN (and this is the amazingly brave part to me) during the second stop, he got back into the ocean again! I don't know that I have that kind of courage to face my fear down twice in one afternoon, but he did. Danimal is one of my new role models and heroes, as well as being a heck of a sweet guy.  

And secondly, I would like to publicly acknowledge Chris Santilli for being a warm, loving, compassionate individual. While she claims anyone would have done what she did, and I believe she is right, the fact of the matter is that she was the one to come to the rescue. Chris, while I'll never be nervous about meeting you because you are SOOO FAMOUS again, you have gained a place of true respect and gratitude in my heart. And I'll still put you up on a pedestal to look up your skirt...  

One moment of shame

Many people from the board know me from my very VOCAL stance on giving everyone the benefit of the doubt, whether they be male or female, clothed or naked,  single or part of a couple, gay or straight, or any variation of sexuality they choose. For the most part, I saw the best side of people at Hedo, and I believe that is probably normally the case at Hedo in general. But.........and you just knew there was a but coming, didn't you......there was one instant in the hot tub that made me very sad to be part of "the group". A German single male was in the hot tub one evening. Before I go on, I'd like to admit that he was doing EVERYTHING wrong. He wasn't talking to people, he was standing too close, he was watching sexual activity until it stopped and then moving on to the next interesting spot. But, to my knowledge, NO ONE politely told him that his activity was out of place or making them uncomfortable. Someone did evidently have the courage to call security to ask him to leave. When security came to ask the gentleman to leave, and he protested his innocence, suddenly the people around him turned into a .... I don't know a polite way to phrase what happened... I guess the best way to describe it was that they turned into a mob. Yelling at the gentleman, shaking fingers, screaming at him about everything that he had done wrong that they hadn't been bold enough to tell him in a non-confrontational manner. After the anger in the Hot Tub had died down, I could hear random bits of conversation. People were telling stories about how they had tried to be unkind to the gentleman in an attempt to get him to go away earlier in the trip. Oh yes, the stories were all told in such a way as it was clear that the teller was in the right, and that it was just the "Vinnie's" own fault for not understanding that they were subtly trying to make him go away. But at that point my own enjoyment of the Hot Tub had soured. It was time to call it a night.  

In my mind, I carry my own guilt for the evening. I think back about at what point I could have, should have stepped in and tried to talk to the man. Different cultures have different ideas of personal space. I have no idea how Hedo is portrayed in Germany. For all I know it could be portrayed in exactly such a way that he thought he was doing nothing offensive. I only know that I felt ashamed at our treatment of him. No matter how much in the wrong we might have thought he was, our treatment of him could have used some improvement.  

A Prude's thoughts while she masquerades as a Nude

I relearned a few lessons this trip. And I would like to share them with anyone thinking about trying the Nude thing. Those of you already comfortable with it can just skip down to something interesting later on.

This shouldn't take long.  

1)       If you don't want to be nude, don't feel like you are missing out on all the fun. The clothing side has it's own charms. You have to be a little more outgoing to start a conversation on the "prude" side, but there are conversations and friendships to be had over there.

2)       If you think that MAYBE you want to try the nude thing, jump into it right away. Either you will love it, and you won't have to kick yourself for not being brave enough sooner, or you will HATE it, and you'll have gotten it out of your system and then  be able to enjoy your vacation on the clothed side. One way or the other, if it is something you think you want to try, waiting is only a loser move.

3)       Ladies, sarongs (pareos) are your friend. They are lightweight, easy to slip out of without a lot of fuss, and easy to put back on again if you feel the need. Gentlemen, they can be your friend too, but its very hard to find one in a "boy" sort of pattern. You might be happier just going for the towel look.

4)       Just because someone is naked doesn't mean they are not laughing at you. They PROBABLY aren't, but you can never be sure. You can only make a decision to let it bother you or not. Likewise, just because someone is young and clothed doesn't mean they ARE laughing at you. Choose your new best friends wisely, and try not to say anything about anyone else that you wouldn't want them to hear. Being Nice DOES Count.

5)       Sunscreen, sunscreen, sunscreen.  

Food, Rooms, and Stuff

I thought the food was fine most of the time, and if I didn't like something, I just didn't finish it. That's the joy of an all-inclusive. There is always something else to try. I'll confess though, after ten days I was getting bored with the food. Mental note to self: I don't have to try a little bit of everything that looks yummy. It will be served again at another meal before I leave.  

From what I remember, Pastafari was good this time. I became distracted relatively early in the meal there, so I don't really remember much about the food. One of my favorite pictures from the trip was taken that evening though.  

Munihana, or whatever the Teppenyaki Restaurant is going to be called, wasn't open by the time I left. I look forward to giving it a try next time. As well as the Scotch Bonnet, which was closed due to the construction. All in all, I believe the next visit will offer up enough options that my tastebuds  shouldn't get so bored  

We roomed over in Oceanview prude by personal preference. No real water problems to speak of. And the view from the Prude beach is beautiful first thing in the morning. It was also very quiet over there when we were in the mood to sleep. While the walk to the Nude side wasn't a LONG walk, it was certainly not a boring walk. Offers to buy shells, jewelry, wood carvings, have my hair braided, or take a new lover were abundant. Oddly enough I never managed to buy shells, jewelry, wood carvings, have my hair braided, or take a new lover. I probably should have tried one of those things.....  After the third day, the blue taxi man seemed to give up hope of selling me anything, but he continued to call to me and say "hello beautiful lady".  

The Hedo Transformation

And speaking of "beautiful lady", there is something special about this trip  that is difficult to explain. I have never considered myself beautiful, even when I probably was. I have always thought of myself as pleasant looking. At Hedo with the WWW crew, I felt beautiful. Not beautiful like a super-model, but beautiful like a cherished friend, or a family member. And all the WWW crew were beautiful to me in that way too (although there were a lot of super-model hotties in the group too). I came back with more confidence in myself. Who knows how long it will last, but it happened, and that is worth any price. Thank you Denny, for being the ringleader of such a group of warm hearted people, and helping turn us into a family, albeit a dysfunctional, perverted family.  

Finally, I would like to thank my bestest friend in the whole wide world. Duck, you are the most fantastic travel buddy that a girl could ever hope to have. I treasure every trip we have taken together, all the good things and the bad things that somehow don't seem so bad afterwards. Your charm and easy nature really shine through when I am on uncertain ground during vacations. I love you, and I'm very glad to have you as my friend. Thank you for accepting me as I am.  

For those of you still reading, congratulations! You've made it to the end. Thank you for taking time out of your day to read through my musings. If you have any questions, please feel free to email me  

Zilla