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the baron here.
this is my “trip report”
for momma and my 4th trip to our vacation resort, hedonism 2 in negril jamaica.
it’s a long one. i gotta
lotta things to tell ya. so,
read it when you have plenty time.
get something to drink, turn the lights down low, and enjoy, if you’re
of the mindset. if you’re not
ina good mood, don’t read anymore. i
believe that my wife, theresa (momma) will be doing her own report sometimes
in the future. i certainly hope
so. she’s a completely
different animal than me, and sees things in a different light.
even “i” look forward to reading her point of view.
the points that you’ll be reading will be my opinion and my opinion
only. it’s not for debate.
could care less if i piss off someone or not.
if you have a prob with it, that’s your prob, not mine.
if you’d like to comment, good or bad, go for it.
as long as you keep those points in mind, we be jammin’.
theresa and i decided to
spend 10 days this time instead of the standard 7 day period.
after years of vacationing, we’ve found that 7 days is just not
enough for “us” to get to where we want to be.
it was a great decision. we’ll
do it again. we had a chance to see a lot of people come and go, and to
see the place in different lights.
momma and i make it a point
to try and enjoy the ENTIRE resort, not just one side or the other.
altho we don’t have a prob with getting naked, it’s not a big thing
to us. we can take it or leave
it. as long as we’re together,
we’re happy. during the morning
ours, we spent our time on the “prude” side. for the new readers of this report, the prude side is the
nicest part of the hedo beach environment, but men have to wear trunks and
ladies, at least, bottoms. topless is cool.
we have several reasons for doing the prude thing in morning, but, the
main one is the music. it’s
great on that side. during the
previous years, i always thought that the nude side bartenders controled it.
i was wrong. one morning i went down to the beach and there was no music,
at all. zilch. nada.
too damned quiet. went to the dive control area and asked them what was up and
he simply picked up the phone, called the office and within 20 seconds, boom,
there was music. not just any
music, but, pure unaldulterated jamaican raggae.
it would stay that way everyday until about noon.
then they’d switch to the “american” stuff.
like i don’t hear enough of that crap when i’m home, ya know.
i’m history when that happens.
another reason for the prude
side in the morning is the people. most
of the www’s are partial to being naked, so, most of the reports you read
will have the favorable slant toward the nude side, which is cool.
but, like i said, we do the whole resort, not just one side.
we met some incredible people there, although “meeting” folks isn’t
my bag, they were nice as could be. lotta
good vibes happnin in paradise. one
such person was ms. colleen, a woman flying “solo” on her first www trip. knows her raggae music, she does. dat’s good too, for a white woman! : - ) ! understand
she did a good thing by hooking up with my cool tub partner, mr. dennis
earlier in her trip he’s a good
man. both are great people.
as mentioned before, the music was great!
until about lunchtime, then it went into that homogenized vanilla music
we hear so often here in the states. once
again, just hedo trying to be everything to everybody.
we all know that is impossible, but, they keep trying.
god bless their hearts.
i had a conversation with
jeff and kim at lunch one day, a very pleasant one, i might add.
they mentioned that one of the reasons they had spent 18 days at hedo
was because of the different people that they had the chance to interact with
and how interesting it had been. while
i’m sure it was in more ways than one,
i told them (and you) that my agenda was completely different.
we don’t go to “meet” people.
if we do, that’s fine, if we don’t, that’s fine too.
we go to spend that time with
each other that we don’t get a chance to spend at home. intense eye to eye,
mind to mind, soul to soul time. most
of the time, i’m in my office at home, if i’m not doing a show.
theresa is taking care of the house and me, which either is a job
within itself. i applaud her. i
respect her. i honor her. i love
her. jamaica is our time to hug,
dance, love, kiss, and everything else we don’t have enough time to do at
home. don’t get me wrong, we
have a lovely time at home. we
make ample time for each other, but, we both know that if there’s an
opportunity for us to make money -- WE’RE THERE!
hedo is the one time i don’t worry about the company and all nerve
endings are tuned to her direction. period.
tis a wunnerful thang, it is.
which brings me to this
point. mr. brad of brad and karen
made it a point to come over to me when early on when i was jammin’ and
reigning over my nude pool domain from the cool tub.
i was boppin’ my head, had my eyes closed, and generally, rockin in my own world (as during much of my
visit). after i came to my
senses after he came over, he said he wanted to come over and say “howdy”
and let me know that “i give good chat”.
lemme tell ya, i was startled, but, pleasantly so.
made me feel good that he enjoyed the chats we’d had in the chat
room. i immediately thanked him
and started apologizing. actually
i did a lot of apologizing during this trip.
momma has always jumped my
case about not being “nice” when i’m on vacation.
and she’s so right. ii’m
not a “nice” person when i’m on vacationl.
i gotta be “nice” allatime in my biz, even when i don’t wanna be.
that’s what i get paid to do. so,
when i’m “off” i’m “off”, but, the persona keeps on.
people seem to be drawn to me, which is a good thing, most of the time. sometimes i don’t wanna “draw” folks. sometimes, i just wanna be left alone. sometimes i wish i could turn it off, but, then when i think
about it, nah, not really. she
says it’s what makes “me”, “me”.
when i’m on vacation, i like to wear my panama hat, my dark
wraparound shades, sit or dance quietly and enjoy myself with my wife.
meantime, people are still coming up wanting to be “friendly”.
momma says that i’m not “friendly”
when i’m on vacation. and she’s
right. don’t really talk much in person.
yeah, hard to believe, ain’t it?
unless i REALLY REALLY like you, and even then you’d be hard pressed
to get a word outta me. i’m a
real quiet person. yeah, hard to
believe that i attempt to communicate so well with the written word and most
of the times do quite well that way. but, in a social setting, i’m not good.
but, it’s true. momma’s the talker, i let her talk for both of us and she
does it quite well.
so much for th that.
i’ll will mention some people, but, not everyone.
so, if i don’t mention you by name, please do not take it personal.
everyone that i had the pleasure of meeting made my trip more special
in every way.
i wanted to share something
with you, especially you that have been to hedo more than once.
if you’re getting a bit restless with the sameness that hedo offers,
may i suggest that you get outta dodge for a minute or two?
if you’ve never been, you gotta go!
just be of the of the mindset that you wanna have fun.
if you got with an attitude, you’ll get ther with an attitude.
we’ve been to ja 11 times.
stayed at the lido, swept way, several sandals, and more.
the one thing that we really never did was get outta the resort.
it was a mistake that i rectified this trip with the help of my good
friends, gumbo and gumbette. it
was their last night there and bo wanted to go off property.
he was kind enough to ask me and my boss to go.
after a bit of indecisioin on my part, i decided to go and i’m so
glad that i did. bo and bette, boomer and steph, and me and da boss headed for
“roots bamboo”. really nice
they way they’ve got that set up. it
was further on down the beach, near swept away.
band set up on stage and they were gittin’ it, ya hear me.
a real live JAMAICAN band play real live RAGGAE music!
it was so awesome! the
band was tight, all sorts of people millin’ around, dancin’ around the
beach. beautiful moon high above,
the calm still bay gently lapping at the soft sugary white sand.
dis band was gittin off, ya hear me, mon!
i had such a good time. it
really helped me realize what you miss by keeping your butt in that resort
from sun up to sun down.
mike of mike and linda, i believe, had been kind enough to share some of his glow sticks with me. he made a purple glow “halo” for me. i had that on from the time i got there till the time i left. can you see this biggo black mon with a purple neon halo bouncin’ to real raggae music on the beach? i was in heaven! stayed a coupla hours and partied.
the gumbo did it right.
we got a taxi driver thru hedo for about $30, took us down there,
stayed with us til we were ready to go, and took us back to hedo.
whatta rush! gonna do dat
agin! oh yeah!
those who know me, know that
i’m a voyeur. i love to watch!
at hedo, you see a bit of everything.
it’s a voyeur’s paradise. we
didn’t wanna sleep for fear that we’d miss something.
from what i can tell, we did miss a coupla few things, but, that’s
cool too.
i’ve seen it before in
reports and smiled to myself when i saw it, but, since i’m a professional
entertainer, i’m probably more aware of a performer than the average person.
i mentioned it before on the chat boards and now i’m going to make a
record of it for the world to see.
mr. delroy was not in a good
mood for most of the time i was there. i,
the staff, the bartenders, the delroy, we are all entertainers.
it’s our job to get smiles and good vibes outta folks with food,
alcohol, music, whatever the tools of our trade to help them feel as good as
they allow themselves to feel. that takes a certain quality.
it’s SHOWBIZNESS!
i’ve been doing what i do for over 20 years. i’m one of the best there is at it. i know when it’s time to turn it on and turn it off. i know when it’s time to “do da show” and “put on a front”. i also know when it’s time to take a vacation. it was time for the delroy to get the heck outta dodge. for a long time. he was not a nice person. at all.
he had about 5 days before his 10 day vacation was to start and he was not doing of very good job of waiting for it.
i, for one, was very glad to see him go. mr. matta did a wunderful job with the throngs of writhing rude butt americans yelling and clamoring for their drinks. i was totally impressed. of course, scumba was doing his great job as consistently as always. the young lady who works there was equally impressive. if you give them a smile and an irie vibe, you be more than rewarded everytime. they’ve been doing this long enough to know who’s full of it and who’s real.
lessee now,
other thangs,
as usual, LOVED the disco.
music was extraordinary loud. especially
for my sound sensitive ears, but, i stayed long enough to get my groove on.
like dennis taylor said in his report, i’m not into the “american”
disco stuff. i hear mambo number
5, madonna, and all the other krap here enough.
don’t travel thousands of miles to a tropical island to hear it all
again. the only time i really
enjoyed the disco was the locals would come in.
the dj had a tendency to play the real jamaican music i came to hear.
since we were there for 10 days, i had a chance to see the disco go
thru it’s changes. during the early part of the week, they play the more
americanized music which seems to go over well with the older americans in
attendance. was really kinda
funny. our older american friends
are not in the shape they used to be in, so, they dance about 15 to 20
minutes, then they’re outta there for other places.
big turnaround in the crowd every 20 minutes or so.
was quite interesting. the
music fits their mood. actually,
it’s quite boring, at least to me. when you know the science, you know what’s
going on. toward the latter part of the week, thursday thru saturday,
it was completely different. more
of a serious dancin’ crowd. my
kinda thang. i enjoyed it when
they played jamaican hip hop. serious
stuff and you can dance for a long long time.
also enjoyed the latin set they laid out. the dj is phenomenal. knows
his business. if you’re not a
dancer, this is of no concern to ya. for
you guys who scream and cry for rock and roll and such, remember, you’re in
another country! you paid big
bucks to be there. relax and go
with the flow. quit fighting having a good time!
i do!
pastafaries was great.
momma and i really enjoyed it. ate
there quite a bit. on our own and
invited by some friends. it was
wunnerful. i don’t remember the a/c being out. saw numerous reports about it, but, never noticed.
we met three lovely young
ladies that decided to venture over to the nude side.
they were a hoot. two of
them came and after i introduced myself, the wife,and several of the crew,
they ended up going back over to the prude side and getting their friend.
nice ladies, but, the nude side wasn’t their thing.
there’s definitely a place for the prude side and their inhabitants.
i’m glad they’re both there. they
didn’t get completely nude, only enough to where they wouldn’t be hassled
(topless). of course they were
that way on the prude side. : - )
! one lady wasn’t gonna
be happy no matter what happenned, but, that’s just where her head was.
the other two didn’t let her stop them.
gonna bring this to a close.
as you can see, i could go on forever about my favorite place.
actually, i’ve been talking about jamaica to my staff so much, they’ve
convinced me to take them as a group. we’ll
be going to hedonism 3 in either spring or fall.
if you’re interested in maybe joining us, feel free to email me at baronbacon@aol.com
. i’ll put you on my mailing
list. it’s gonna be one heckuva
party! my krew is krazy!
thank you to the denny-mon
for his website, kindness and
guidance. mostly, d-mon, thank you for being my friend.
if you have any questions or
comments, knock yourself out. email
address is included.
talk to ya later.
one love!