BaronBacon's WWW 98 H-II Trip Report

i hope this communication finds you in good health and spirits. i'm honored that you'd like to know about theresa and my 2nd trip (07/09/98-07/16/98) to hedonism 2.

be aware that there will be somethings in this report you may or may not understand, as it's going to a host of friends, family, internet buds, and folks who want to know. therefore, there may be some explanations that some may be needed and provided, it may be a bit redundant to some and to some, maybe not. i beg your indulgence as i try and explain the BEST VACATION OF MY LIFE!

know that i'm a stickler for details as i always try and give you the best "visual" picture i can via words. so bear with me! download this and read it later if you'd like, it's lengthy. feel free to contact me via email if you have any questions or comments you'd like to personally make. feel free to say exactly what's on your mind, as i will always do likewise. this report is my opinion and my opinion only. not really for debate, just fyi! 'kay, nuff of the pre game ---- llllllleeeeetttt's get ready to rrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuummmmmmbbbbbllllee!!!!!!!!!

momma and i have been to the carribbean around 8 times now. we've stayed at many different resorts, encountered many differrent people, but we've never ever been or stayed anywhere like hedo (other than the first time, 2 years ago)! understand that the first time is nothing like the next times. although, i totally enjoyed myself on our first trip, i came away SO freaked out that i didn't give the place or the people there the credit i should have. hadda lotta questions, asked a lotta people, gotta lotta answers. not all good, but not all bad.

this last time, i went "knowing" exactly what to expect and how to or not to deal with it. we actually "overprepared". for example, had my storebout extra cool floates to float on. NEVER took them outta the suitcase! hedo has brand new and nice floaties all over the place! i don't mean the cheapies! they spent some money and got the GOOD ones.

the water was as crystal clear and placid as negril is famous for. absolutely, wonderful! gotta tona friends at the sandals resort next door, that we know and love from our 3 week long visits there over the past 4 years before we discovered hedo. went over to see them, they're doing marvelous! we walked the length of the beach till we couldn't walk anymore along the beach itself.

the new nude pool complex (at least new to us, it had been two years since our last visit), is as the young people say "da bomb!"! i never left the resort in the seven days i was there! didn't need to, didn't want to, just didn't. mr. delroy wasn't there when i arrived thursday 07/09/09. he didn't get in til that monday from his tournament, which i'm proud to say, they won! so, most of my time was spent with mr. scumba. great smile, great attitude, great man. made a special drink for me and wouldn't tell me what was in it so i had to only ask "him". what a putz! but, a sweet putz!

i'm gonna try and cover some of the things that my aol buddies seem to have concerns about. if this applies to you, great, if not, chill till i finish.

food real good very plentiful quite tasty did want to experience the "chinese night" that seems to be not so popular. momma and i practically "live" on chinese food in dallas, along with barbeque. (real good for real texans, huh?) we know good chinese food and bad chinese food. hedo does a good job for jamaicans. BUT (and you'll hear this again) i go to jamaica to experience JAMAICA, not china. jamaica, period. and that includes "food". if i can get something, anything "jamaican" for lunch or dinner, i'm a happy camper. chinese night was the one night i couldn't find anything jamaican. i can get great chinese food here in the states. just hedo trying to please everyone, which is impossible, but i give them an "a" for effort! the rest of the food was great, no complaints. well, some, but, not worth worrying about.

never did the pastafaris restaurant thang. for those of you not familiar with hedo, that's the classy italian restaurant on site. gotta make reservations, get a "bit", just a bit dressy. from all the reports i've seen, read, and heard, it's supposed to be one of the better experiences during your hedo visit. all of the people i talked to that went, really enjoyed it. didn't hear not one negative comment about it.. and that's good, real good! but, once again -- i can go to a lot of good italian restaurants here in dallas. i don't go to jamaica to make "reservations". don't wanna have to wear a watch unless i want to. why would i do that in a foreign country? i'm not in italy. if i wanted real italian food, i'd go to italy. i'm in jamaican mon! gimme a jamaican restaurant! then, you'll have to beat me out! jamaica, jamaican food. jamaica, jamaican music. are we getting on the same page here? anyway, enjoy pastafari's. i understand that it's "heavenly".

since i'm an entertainer, music is always paramount to me. mr. scumba was having serious problems with the sound system. it wasn't even playing when i arrived. the entire thursday was "quiet". too damned quiet. hung (butt naked) in the pool with no music. comfortable, but not really "happy". so early the next day, i asked mr. scumba what was up with the music? he said they were having problems with the cd player. i asked if i could bring my "boom box" out and he smiled that famous smile of his and said ya mon! i got it, he put it up on the second shelf of the booze stack, put on irie fm (the local real jamaican music station) and we proceed to "jam" for a while! now, i'm the type of man that when i hear raggae music, my hips just start to rotate, my head gets to bobbin', hell i just go nuts! don't really give a rats butt who's watchin'. i was dancin' around the pool, bouncing on the pool chair at the bar, singing, it was great! after bout an hour, i left for some reason for bout 15 minutes, came back and it was "quiet" again! asked mr. scumba what happenned? he said somebody bitched about the music, said they wanted to hear rock and roll. WHAT! don't you hear enough of that in the states? i don't understand why one goes to another country, hear me now, country! and expect it to be like hometown usa in the states! HELLO!!! YOU'RE NOT IN THE USA!!!! it ain't gonna happen. give the jamaicans the respect they deserve. we go because we want to be there and experience "them" and their culture, don't we? course that's just my opinion. not trying to push it on anyone else.

anyway, i took my radio back to my room. if you don't wanna play with my bat and ball, why keep it out? mr. scumba could see how much i settled down after the music was off, don't really think he liked that. now, don't get me wrong, i wasn't pouting, i just wasn't "jammin'!" like i was when the music was on. he made a special call and got them to come down and at least "attempt" to fix the music. he told me that if the music was coming from the main system, it really didn't matter how much anyone bitched about it, it was gonna stay the way it was. needless to say, that got another smile outta me! they've hooked real nice speakers that look like rocks with holes in them up and down the beach area, by the nude hot tub, and more, that's fed by the main system at the pool. real nice set up! and sounded pretty good, most of the time. who am i kidding, i was just happy to have real jamaican music again!

a real long haired dude came out while the cd changer was doing it's thing, you know, reloading, etc. so, there was no music for about 10 or 15 minutes. so the long hair dude brings out the HUGE gigantic boom box and proceeds to put in his "zz top's greatest hits" cd. real loud! i go over to mr. scumba and politely ask him to turn off the pools sound system and let our friend party for a while. as busy as he is, he stops what he's doing and complies. we go thru the zz top, then thru jimmy buffets greatest hits. all of them. after about 2 hours of rock and roll, i go over (with a smile) and ask the long hair fella if he'd mind if we cut the pool system back on for a while cause i came here to hear jamaican music. of course, i asked with ultimate respect and courtesy. he was really cool about it! no prob, mon. he said he didn't hear anything on when he came out, so i told him that the cd was just changing when he came out and i asked mr. scumba to turn it down for a while and let him enjoy his music. he was cool with it all and we turned everything back on, and it was a party for all involved. it was really, really, nice. he was all the way cool. we partyed together all week. animal!

place was pretty full, but not packed. most were on the nude side, very light attendance on the prude side. no real buttholes. met some real nice guys from the northern u.s.. kinda dooffus, but sweet as hell. they had no problems meeting real nice women. couple of em even got laid, which i'm sure they didn't mind, but, it didn't seem to be the "pressing" thing on their agenda. i'm sure that helped them in the long run! nice guys!

the ac is definitely working in the disco. they had it blastin' at warp factor 7. it was great! the air in our room was a bit more stingy, but, not enough to gripe about. besides what good would that have done? no problem, mon. as long as it was cool enough for me to sleep, i was happy. and i was happy most of the time!

had a chance to meet several aol'ers while there (america online computer link). mr. hedohenry was the first. someone mentioned that he had been in the pool the day before playing with a large rubber snake. i remembered him in my "fog" and asked someone who was a bit more coherant (sp) than me to point him out the next day if he showed up. well, sure nuff, he did. made a beeline over to him to shake his and and hook a face up to the name. shoulda seen his eyes and face when i took his hand, shook it, and said "howdy! i'm "the baron". it was great! shoulda hada camera! first thing he said was, hey, i didn't get involved in all that! i just smiled and patted him on the back and said "no problem, mon" and that it was a pleasure to finally meet him. after that, we always acknowledged each other with a smile, wave, or both. incredible man. it was a pleasure, sir!

also meet mr. denny pasternak (sp) and ms. smiling 57. i believe that mr. denny arrived saturday. could be wrong on that. i'd already been there since thursday and was leaving the next, so we had about 3 or four days to "hang out". i considered myself very fortunate for those things. two of the coolest people ever in the whole world to meet, sit with, drink with, talk with, and party with. i can't say enough about both. it was an honor to meet both of you. really, really, really! mr. denny was constantly meeting and greeting the different people who'd been using his website, or like me, just wanted to connect. he always had a great big smile and a marvelous attitude. after talking with him for just a while, you got the feeling that you'd known him for a lifetime. but, he was at his best in the disco! that man can really get down, you hear me! geeetttt downnnn! i was impressed! and it takes a lot to impress me! he did!!!!!

i don't know what's "tame" and what's not. the pj party was a lotta fun. at least to me! hey, it's what you make it! and i made it a party, every day! momma said that she'd never see me act like that and she was right! normally i don't say much when on vacation. i talk for a living, don't wanna talk when i'm chillin'. but, with hedo, i knew what i was getting into. and i was ready! i had a real good time!

the shower was a lotta fun, too! found myself playing games with it. i'd try and guesstimate about when it was gonna change from hot to cold and back. one thing you won't do is relax while taking a shower. found that as long as you didn't take one during "rush" hour, you're in pretty good shape. during rush hour, you're on your own!

went to the prude side for one day, still among one of the nicest spots in the resort. of course, the music was on there too, it's hooked into the pool sound system. nice sandy bottom, crystal clear, very, very, calm. you'd think you were in the middle of a living post card. lotta nice bodies around. seems like this is the place to be if you wanna watch bodies or be watched. male and female. everyone's wearing nice outfits, accenting whatever attributes one deems is their best. ho-hum. cute. been there, done that. see it every day at most any swimming pool. some really don't care if you're looking or not, most do, though. cute.

the entertainment coords. were interesting. mr. mark has the most enthusiasm and seems to have the most fun. someone needs to talk to mr. robyn about his facial expressions when he's walking around. looks like he's mad at the world! all in all, the coords do a good job. everything can always be improved, but, all in all -- it's all good!

i like the naturalnest of being "au natural". everybody's just themselves. when you're naked, who else can you be? met a lotta really incredible people on the nude side. momma met some from the prude side still trying to get up nerve to hang out on the nude side after 5 visits. go for it! i told em. they probably didn't this time either. what a shame.

momma and i will be going back every july, prolly, bout the same time. thank you to all of the wonderful people that we met. we'll look forward to the stable growing at the visits add up.

be sweet and we'll be talkin'.

once again, if you have any questions, feel free!

the baron and theresa (momma)