Hedonism II Trip Report - Chris: May 2-14, 2026

Chris Santilli Trip Report May 2-14, 2026
chris@chrissantilli.com (https://chrissantilli.com)


Part I
Jamaican police (marine, not land) are walking the beach more frequently. They’re patrolling to prevent hard drug sales, not weed.

Hedo management has no problem with the few known regular beach weed vendors, such as Shell Boy, for the sole reason they keep others away, who might be dangerous.

The vendor “Red Hat” is particularly good at protecting his turf.

Remember, though, on all Jamaican beaches the area of the waterline are public; public sex seen from there and the sea are illegal.

So far, it’s never been a problem at Hedo.

The government, again so far, has long looked the other way because Hedo is so successful.

General manager David Graham was surprised that the occasional prostitute still plies her wares at Hedo.

But more surprised was the man last week who had cozied up to a woman before she said her rate was $300.

Two weeks in a row a code brown happened at the nude pool; accidents do happen! Guests quickly moved to the prude beach pool to continue the party.

A long-time beloved guest named Tracy died in the ambulance after she had a heart attack during the Sexy Silvers week this May; she had an underlying illness.

The next day a rainbow came out that her many friends liked to think of as Tracy’s goodbye.

About four to five guests die at Hedo a year, which is not unusual in the hospitality industry, said David Graham.  Hedo has no morgue, unlike cruise boats.

Sexy Silvers filled what seemed like more than 80% of the resort the first week of my 74th Hedo trip, May 2-14, 2026.

They filled up two catamarans' worth one afternoon that resulted in what more than one guest called an orgy.

The group also held two car washes on the nude pool deck that week—the line of women extended from the bar to past the hot tub.

Party-Marc from Vegas entertained daily with age-appropriate music and the best pool night-time game ever: he armed guests with gazillions of battery-powered LED rings that sparkled with lights.  

In this War of the Rings, guests in the nude pool and hot tub shot the rubbery rings back and forth in combat, as a spectacle of flying colors against the night sky.

Eventually guests called a truce so poolers could access the bathrooms and tubbers could access the bar.

The next week of my trip, though, featured three distinct groups.

A Shibari (rope tying) group of 61 guests worked their artsy fetish daily under a tent set up on the prude beach; they preferred to keep gawkers away but did do some evening performances on the beach.

A second group, 1 Helluva Week, kept primarily to the prude beach bar and pool area most afternoons (one of their guest rooms even had four single women!).

And The Rascals group had its tent on the nude beach for their tequila tastings. Each night they dressed in their own themes, such as Bird & Bees and Under the Sea.

Some guests said having the three distinct groups at Hedo felt divisive, but everyone was fun to talk with when people made the effort to cross the invisible boundary.


Part II
The new glass bottom boat was not yet in use during my May 2-14, 2026, trip but will be as soon as the final paperwork is returned from the authorities.  [Since then it’s being used at the resort]

Too bad, management won't remove the G & L from Glass Bottom on its side.

The government has been slow to recover since Hurricane Melissa smashed into the island last October so paperwork is slow too. Even marriage certificates are taking longer than normal to mail out.

Once the new boat is fully operational, it will join the dive boat and the snorkeling boat as a multi-purpose boat.

Some evenings (such as Tuesday and Sunday) the ECs are no longer holding costume contests before the show time. Occasionally they didn’t hold mid-day games at the prude beach either.

The disco continues to only be open a few days a week; guests prefer to party in the courtyard and on the top-side pool deck.

The huge mermaids logo on the side of the spa rooms is gone—it had been damaged during Hurricane Melissa at the end of October 2025.  [It’s been fixed and re-added as of August 2026]

The bit of roof left in the tree that marked the existence of the old prude beach tree bar has been removed now too.

The remnants were sad, but they made me nostalgic. Photos of the tree bar from the 1970 to the 1990s are in the origin story book about Hedo’s infamous past….called Before Harry Met Hedo.

And although the two ice machines near the guest rooms have been removed, the ice buckets are still in the rooms. To fill them, guests need to go to a bar—or use the self-service soda pop and ice dispenser at the nude hot tub.

Guests cannot pay for Kama Sutra Palace (KSP) services with Hedo bucks, but they can pay with Hedo credits earned or won.  

KSP closes temporarily in August and the early part of September. Its daily info re: beach yoga, tantric workshops, and sensual massage is posted on its front door and on the gym's blackboard.

Inara Blackwood’s sexy artwork was still occasionally being auctioned during the repeater party to benefit the Hedonism II Foundation which supports the local community and schools. The bids lacked generosity for the original art pieces.

The repeater party was held in the dining room two weeks in a row because of rain.

The Monday night beach party was canceled for lack of interest during Sexy Silvers and because of rain the following week.

A guest complained about the six or so scuba divers who plop themselves and their gear into the prude beach pool daily to freshen up after their dives for about five minutes.

The result? Orane at the dive shack got an email instructing him to tell divers not to do that anymore.

So the divers just moved their dipping point 60 feet over to the pool next to the disco.

As with all things, Jamaica, I’m suspect that too shall pass, and the divers will return within a week to do what they’ve been doing for decades without fuss.

Hedo does have a blacklist (so far, fewer than 100 people) who many not return to the property and adds 6 to 10 names a year.  

Bad behavior, excessive rudeness, and fights result in banishment.  The ratio of men to women on the list is 50-50.

Observations:

Part III
Though the entertainment coordinator (EC) dancers may look naked on stage, the women are wearing pantyhose and nipple covers.

One night during my May 2-14 Hedo trip, the ECs danced to especially brilliant choreography that involved movements that could rival Broadway—with NO bumping and grinding, unlike most of their performances.

Winston Bartley sang most nights—all with incredible energy. His title is now Senior Guest Experience Manager, but he’s still in charge of entertainment and more too.

Winston is announcing from the stage that he’s been at Hedo for 23 years (he started in 2003), which is about as close as he’ll come to telling you his age.

Damian, a long-time entertainment coordinator, had the best answer to a yes/no question: “You have 50-50 odds that I may or may not be right.”

Jeffery Johnson, the food and beverage manager for decades who started working for the resort when it opened in December 1976 (the resort had a soft open in November 1976), again says he’s “definitely” planning to retire in 2026.

In response, general manager David Graham says, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”  

Likewise, Jeffery’s been telling me of his retirement for years, but this year feels like I “have 50-50 odds that I may or may not be right” in my supposition that his retirement is imminent.

No one is readily in place to replace Jeffery.  He’s a jewel at Hedo who puts service ahead of everything to keep guests happy.

Paulette Abbott, the long-time prude beach bartender, was rocking deep red-colored hair.  

Since losing her roof from Hurricane Melissa at the end of October, Paulette said she and her mother are doing better.  

Jeffery Johnson has been to Paulette’s house and says she’s doing fine.  Paulette’s mother might be suffering from PTSD, though; she becomes frightened when she hears the wind blow.

For whatever reason, there seems to be some secrecy about who is on the board of directors at Hedo.

Here’s what I’ve learned of the board so far: Harry Lange (the 100% owner of Hedo) is the chairman.  But we knew that!

His sister-in-law Diane Lange is the CEO.  

Harry’s brother Richard Lange is in charge of snow removal.

In the past I've been told Richard is also in charge of economizing.  And gossip says some of his attempts involved using fake liquors for flavoring crepes.  My last one was so awful, I haven't tried one since.  If anyone can provide current feedback, I'd appreciate it.

Harry’s two adult daughters, Julia and Sarah, are also on the board, along with Hedo’s CFO, John T., who seemed surprised when I told him that Richard Lange let me know.

The board might have one or two other members.

General manager David Graham says he’s not on the board but attends the meetings, which makes sense since he’s in charge of enacting what the board decides.

Many staff members were saying “thank you for returning.”

Staff does receive a Christmas-time annual bonus based on occupancy.

I asked David Graham if they are told to say it to guests. Nope, they are doing it of their own volition.