Gary - March, 2016
We spent the first week of March at Hedo, and our 20th trip was
more than eventful! Here are some highlights:
The Good:
We had water in the room every time we wanted it - both hot and
cold! It never came through the ceiling, under the door or from the
room next door. Not once did I have to go to the spa for a shower or
to brush my teeth. This major problem, happily, seems to be solved.
The Bad:
Food and beverage still has its issues. One breakfast, all I wanted
was a fried egg. I was in line forever before I realized Austin's
burners were running out of gas. I moved over to another station and
waited and waited. After 20 minutes I gave up and sat down with a
slice of cantaloupe with my breakfast companions who were done by
now and ready to go. One lunch there was nothing to eat as I wanted
something more than lettuce. I have been trained over the years to
be wary of all things sausage down there. They had grilled brats, so
I mustered my courage and took a 3" stub. It looked lonely on the
plate then I noticed on the big board they were serving both egg and
potato salad but none were on display. I found a sous chef, who said
"stand right there, I will go make you some". One can't ask for
better service than that! Except that I stood there for over 10
minutes before she reappeared with a big plate of each. By then,
when I went to get a bratwurst, none were cooked and that was
another 10 minute wait. I didn't bother, so that lunch I had egg
salad.
There was the leg of lamb that had been cooked down to jerky. It
should have gone from oven right into the trash - the brief stop on
my dinner plate served no purpose. There was the pork roast also
overcooked, but a brown gravy would have hidden the sin, but there
was no gravy available. I choked down a little bit.
On turkey night I had the serious misfortune of being behind the
guy that got the last slice of white meat. She put some skin, fat
and grizzle on my plate. I understand bad timing, I had it. Problem
is, the exact same thing happened the night before with the duck. I
was only there for eight dinners - that was two of them - 25% of the
dining experience.
We tried the new chop house - and to be fair, seven out of eight in
our party enjoyed it. My petit filet mignon never would have been a
filet no matter how they cooked it, but the problem was they never
cooked it. My medium rare order was served raw - cold, purple,
rubbery and went straight into the trash. That night I had three
grilled shrimp.
I tried lunch at the nude grill once. My hamburger was so
overcooked it had assumed the shape of a potato chip, all curled up.
Off to the trash it went.
I wanted ginger ale. The dispensary by the hot tub had a ginger ale
icon, but all week when one put their cup up to it, it was filled
with club soda. I was able to get ginger ale at other bars but no
two ever looked or tasted the same. I am not a foot soldier in the
cola wars, but I have had it with Jamaican rum and Pepsi - rum and
pepsi just doesn't cut it. Besides I was getting tired of buying
cans of coke at the gift shop in this all inclusive resort. They
need to make the switch to coke products.
The Ugly:
Six out of eight of our fellow travelers became ill, and we all
blame the air conditioning units. When we got home there were two
peumonias, a bronchitis and basic Jamaican crud. Our room was struck
particularly hard as we had to run the ac all night to drown out the
frat party directly above us every night. The resort seems to think
it is ok to insert a pod of eight (8) college children in an
upstairs room in garden view nude. Published rate for our room is
$600 / night and we found ourselves shacked up in a college
dormitory. The party would wind down around 3 am when all the
furniture was dragged around to make room for all the air
mattresses. When you put eight college kids in a room with unlimited
free alcohol and one toilet bowl, let me tell you, the music never
stops.
Guest relations wasn't very understanding, never mind sympathetic.
Sure, they offered to move us, but at that point I just wanted to be
moved home. I had had it.
Gary