Nick & Frances
Nick and Frances: Hedo Exiles Report 6/12/07-6/20/07
Before details of the trip-the comparison most people probably want to know
about:
Hedo II vs. Hedo III
Rooms:
Hedo III- bar none. Remote controlled AC, hot-tubs in every room,
lots of space.
Food:
Hedo II- Anyone who complains about the cuisine at Hedo II really ought to
see the other side. Greasy omelets, bad coffee, and
water at every meal that tastes like pure chlorine. The only dishes
that were tolerable were the roasted pig and duck served at dinner a couple
of nights. Food at II was good-though Munasan has changed their appetizers
from our last trip to some calamari and seaweed concoction that wasn’t
great-but ya gotta love the green tea ice cream! Pastafari at III seems to
be the same.
Staff:
Tie. The grounds crew, EC’s, etc are undeniably hard workers and friendly at
both places. At II, you can miss a year as we did and people will greet you
with a huge smile the minute you’re back. III appears to be the same way.
Management really ought to emulate its staff’s commitment to knowing the
guests.
Facilities/Layout:
Hedo II (surprise!) Hedo III is
a beautiful place-you can tell there was careful planning that went into
almost every aspect of it. The snaking pools and waterslide are great, and
everything has that fresh feeling. That said, the beach is nearly
non-existent, and I think it hurts the atmosphere. Whereas at II you can be
a pool person or a beach bum and never have to visit the other place, at III
you’re forced to plop in a pool at some point to get a drink. Also, the quad
area at III, while nice in that it is truly c/o, is just not conducive to
what we consider the Hedo atmosphere (it could have something to with the
nonstop blasting music that runs 24/7). Hedo II, with its longer beach,
quieter speakers, and hidden hot tubs offers places of respite for folks
wanting to get away from the party-at Hedo III,
you’re more or less stuck with the Spring Break atmosphere wherever you go.
Ambience/Overall Experience/Bottom Line:
Hedo II
To us, the difference between Hedo
II and III is the same as Coke Classic vs. New Coke. Sure, the newer one
might taste better and have prettier packaging, but you just can’t
Beat the Real Thing. II is a place of
options-mellow or wild, Spring Break or Honeymoon.
III felt to us like Spring Break on steroids. If that’s what you dig, you
may want to check out the New Coke Hedo, but give us our Classic.
Actual Trip Report
Note: Being as we’ve already pointed out much of our aggravation at Hedo
Mgt. on the board already, we intend to keep it to a minimum here. Also, any
omissions or time-sequence errors are solely our own and due to exhaustion
and lost brain cells.
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Tuesday: Left for BDL Hartford at 3 AM-arrived in MBJ around 130 and were at
Hedo II at about 3. Not less than 5 minutes in room, knock on door, a guy
(name not remembered) brings us “towels for the pool”. Asks what we want. I
say a dance with MaryJane for $20 would be nice. 5 minutes later I’m in
possession of the freshest ounce of ganja I have ever seen.
Quasi-unpacked before running nekkid
to the pool where we met up with a lot of folks from our last excursion.
Lasted the whole week. 20 minutes later, a torrential downpour hits and
we’re back in the room to sleep until dinner. It was the only rain we saw
the entire trip. Dinner was fun-if
only because we were greeted by nearly everyone who we had seen 2 years ago!
There’s something beautiful about a place where you can miss a year, come
back, and see all the same people. Caught up on some things before heading
over to the piano bar with some of the Beach Rangers before PJ night.
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Wednesday: Bumming around the pool and getting reacquainted. Some random,
stoned picture-taking. Repeaters party where we first spoke to Ms. Clarke
regarding our exile and options.
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Thursday morning meeting with Ms. Clarke. Details on all that transpired can
be read in the message board threads. After breakfast, hit the pool for a
bit before our erotic photography class that was taught by the talented
Thomas. Got a few beach shots before security intervened. People tried to
plead the case, but the line was ‘If I let you do it, then everyone
will…etc.’ So we retreated to the Garden and then
the prude wading pool for some more photography. Interestingly, we were
probably at the wading pool for at least 45 minutes before a watersports
staff member told us to put clothes on. This is all the more ironic given
that what I’d consider the more NC-17 shots were done there. Such is the
nature of Hedo rules. More poolside lounging before Toga Night, which itself
was rather pathetic in terms of participation. Chalk it up to the low
occupancy.
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Friday: Pleasantly surprised to learn of our 2 free days of compensation on
our next trip. Set the tone for a fine day of beach bumming. Naked water
sliding at night. It was the only time we saw the slide open all week. Still
there’s nothing like going down it nekkid and high at midnight! Karaoke
night in the piano bar where Nick performs his apparently much remembered
and requested Guns N Roses staple ‘Sweet Child O’Mine’. It was also this day
that we were informed of the nasty stomach Hedo Crud going around that week
after it felled 2 folks we knew. Unfortunately,
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Saturday: The Exile begins. Goodbyes to all the folks departing home and the
traditional Moon Hill salute as we departed on our bus. Took in the scenery
en route to the New Coke Hedo. It was at our pit stop that
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Sunday: Hedo Crud attacks full force.
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Monday: Fellow exiles Jesse and Debbie have the good fortune to run into a
doctor who was vacationing there. Checks out
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Tuesday: Hedo Crud withers away as we say goodbye to some of our departing
exiles. Spend the rest of the day beachside and poolside trying to just soak
in as much as we can before the inevitable packing. PJ night Part II- Anyone
who thinks the disco is deafening at Hedo II ain’t heard (or not heard)
anything. Party seems dead so we watch Jesse go down the waterslide a couple
of times before going off to do some dirty photo shoots, check out our
private hot-tub and pack.
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Wednesday: On the bus to MBJ at 10AM for what was supposed to be a 2PM
flight. Waited 20 minutes in USAir line to find out flight would be delayed
a half hour, and that our connector in
So
that’s the summary. Observations, lessons learned:
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Whatever we may think of management, the staff at Hedo are phenomenal people
who work hard and are always willing to engage in conversation, and help
out.
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Hedo creates solidarity among guests that I doubt you will find at many
other places of social gathering. If you go for anything else (save sex), it
has to be this.
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You
haven’t really had a vacation experience till you’ve been sick on one (Nick
learned this years ago, now
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USAir is the antichrist.
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We
can live with 2 free nights.
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You
can’t beat the original brand, whether it’s soda or resorts.