This is our first trip report after 6 visitsshameful I know!
For my extreme case of laziness I shall attempt to compensate you by being at least minimally entertaining!
Our trip down on Air Ja-Maybe, non-stop out of Newark, was delayed by 25 minutes because they had a technical problem- they forgot to fuel up the PLANE! Nice they figured it out before take off!
We had a head wind so that made our arrival even later. :^(
Once in Sangster, baggage, Customs, and all the arrival Hoo-Ha went smoothly and without a glitch. I do however miss the stairs onto the tarmack when getting off the plane; it was always a nice welcome to Jamaica.
We take a cab from the airport to H2, never the bus as we always seem to get stuck with a bunch of up-tight Grand Lido people who cannot even consider stopping for a pee break, much less stop at 2 or 3 local bars, or Cousins for some smoke. Besides if we wanted to ride on an air-conditioned Trailways sized bus we would have stayed HOME! Our cab left before the H2 bus, they passed us 2 times on the way, but somehow we ended up at H2 before them? Cecil let us out of the cab and whisked our bags away before the onslaught of the arriving crowd, good thing too, the bus was FULL!
We had booked ROH, always do, always ended up on the nude side too. this time they only had prude rooms or so they claimed.a small up-charge helped find us a nice room on the nekid side.amazing!
Room was same old-same old. Clean, serviceable, basic. We do not use the ac, so I did not check its screen; the bathroom shower did not leak and had great pressure and plentiful hot water. The mirror over the bed was wonderful as always, but I do wish it had a magnifying feature- cause as some of us get older our eye sight weakens!
The bartenders are my favorite folks on the ranch. Matta is my hero, Delroy is an angel, Scumba is a comedian, Paulette is everybodys Auntie, King Arthur is a prince among men, the young man with out a name tag who works the disco bar and found my purse is a sweetie, and Bridgette the Trainee who works at Delroys is a sick persons best friend! After being poisoned by Pastafarri the previous night I was looking poozly in a lounge chair by the nude pool bar, Bridgette noticed and made the most horrible tasting drink for me (only about 4 oz.), she assured me it would make me better and forced me to drink it.long story short- it did- I am grateful for this clever young Jamaican girl!
The food, with the exception of Roberts Grill, sucks worse than EVER beforeI actually lost about 5 pounds in 9 days! Now as a woman this really is not so terrible, but damn, those 5 pounds were my tits..why is it NEVER my ass?
H2s entertainment staff has been at it too long, the older members need a longer break than 1 day off a week, and I dont even want to know how many hours a week they work- surely they have to be Exhausted and that in turn effects their disposition, hell Im grumpy with 7 hours of sleep! Poor Foxy, I wish I could hide her and let her nap for 3 or 4 days.
As always the best thing about H2 is the fine folks you meet. Some shy, some silly, others rude, outrageous, funny, weird, bored, horny, appalled, interesting, self-centered, adventurous, talkative, drunk, educational, overbearing, and about a hundred other adjectives I dont have the time to write. Simply put- The guests are our favorite part!
I am proud to say..we managed to get sucked in by the sand gravity our very first day..lazy days by the nude pool, surfacing for lunch at the main dining room, slumming on the prude side to see how the other half stands all that excitement, then back to the nude pools for awhile, a little pre-dinner-dinner at Roberts, followed by a late afternoon siesta/bedroom meeting, then a late dinner and socialize, dance, and party till we cant stand it any more, bed around 4 or 5 ish, almost miss breakfast , and start all over again!
Perhaps the silliest thing about our stay was that one of the entertainment girls bullied my hubby into being in the Body in motion lunch spin (OK I bullied too).he is a confirmed NON-participator, so it was wonderful to see him get involved and have a great time.I told him See, it didnt kill you, and look Honey- you won 2nd prize!. Bet he volunteers next time.in fact I see naked Twister in his future!
We had the good fortune to meet a lovely couple, Rich & Dianne, on their maiden visit. Virgins they were! It was Diannes **th Birthday! What an awesome present, your the man Rich, and a TRUE PROFFESSIONAL in our book! It was our great pleasure to have the kitchen make a yummy Vanilla Spice cake for the special occasionit was a most excellent tribute to a lovely lady.
Other couples we met both before our trip via Dennys and at H2 were all great fun, Julie & Kevin, Jeff & Julie, Amy & Jason, and Hayden & Belinda especially. You were all excellent company; hope we see you on another trip, too!
A Special note to PW & his wife, you guys had the most wonderful costumes.you should offer a consultant service; I looked forward each night to see what you would both have on!
Unfortunately due to a bee sting on his foot, my allergic husband (whose bee kit was on the counter at home) lost 1 days including PJ night! I lost 1 day due to Pastafari Poisoning, the weather sucked for 2 days, so all together this maimed 5 days of our 9..I am currently lobbying for a DO-OVER!!!!
Suffice to say we are looking forward to coming back yet again, now that I have overcome my shyness with the POLE in the disco..the first time is the hardest..we are ready to take our chances with hurricane seasoncome on October!