Trip Report
Hedo II
February 5 14, 2006
Rookie Trip
Jeff and Julie
When we started planning a last minute get away, we found Grand Lido in Jamaica on our internet searches. We both have been to Jamaica several times but not to an all inclusive resort. In our search for information, we came across Dennyp.com. We started reading the postings on Hedo and couldnt stop laughing.
We both decided what the heck, lets stay at Hedo II and do it at least once in our lives. After the year Ive had, I figured, who cares who sees me naked. (Ive never done the nude thing before and didnt think I could get naked, but what the hell)
We actually planned the holiday for seven days. We learned that Delta flies directly to MoBay therefore our frequent flier miles could be used and we added two more nights to our trip before even leaving stateside. We added the two days because of the postings on the site and Chris book.
Before leaving, we read every single post on Dennys site. I am so glad that we emailed many couples from the trip schedule before we left because I felt that I could get naked with friends, but not strangers. I ordered Chris book and read it twice before we left. I laughed both times. The first time I read it was simply for the basic experience, the second time was to study the resort, etc. Yes, Im a little obsessive compulsive behavior, but I do know how to have a good time.
We only told two people where we were really going (they actually guessed), but since returning, Ive told everyone that we were at Hedo!
We flew directly from CVG to MoBay and flight was a little bumpy. No biggie. We scheduled the TimAir flight from MoBay to Negril before we left. TimAirs flight fees did go up on January 20, but they honored our pricing because we booked online before that date.
When we arrived at customs in MoBay, we had two carryon bags (packed with the immediate need items for instance beach access) and two very large canvas bags packed with goodies, water guns, condoms, condoms, and more condoms. We brought our own togas, coolly designed ahead of time, and everything that anyone put on a list on Dennys site. I did add FaBreeze to the list because I am a non smoker and wasnt sure what the hotel rooms would smell like from all the ganja and the cigarette smoke. I used it for everything. The skunkweed was overpowering. No wonder people like Jamaica.
Because we used the Hedo luggage tags from Superclubs, we were searched. Yes, that was us with the screaming orgasm keychain that kept the immigration officer laughing because she could hear it but not find it. They searched us because we were told we had too much stuff for the zoo. Direct quote! They do not allow water guns, toy guns or any such items into Jamaica. Because we were both such easy going people and said okay, the immigration officers had a huddle and decided it was okay for us to take them, especially since we were going to the zoo. Immigration could have made our lives very difficult, but because we were so friendly they let us keep them. They were very very nice.
After an exhaustive search (yes, they went through EVERYTHING in our bags) we arrived at the SuperClub area. Very nice, but the bus was leaving right then. The area cleared out quickly so we were kinda left on our own. Everyone at the airport was super friendly and made sure we got to the right individual for TimAir. We literally could have gotten off the plane and right onto the bus.
We love little planes so flying TimAir was part of the fun of our vacation. We did wait about 15 minutes or so for the rep, then they put us in a little mini van and drove us to the other side of the airport. For the newbies, there are 5 people who touch your luggage from the moment you say you are on TimAir until your butt is in a plane seat. Lots of tipping. On the return trip, we had to take the bus back because of high winds. So we experienced both the flight and bus rides.
Everyone was very nice at TimAir. Pilot was funny. We were with two other couples, one going to Lido and the other going to Hedo for the first time too. No crazy antics on the flight, other than the pilot thought it was cute to play chicken with the Delta 757. Basically it was like cutting in line. Oh well.
We could see the SuperClub bus from the air, so we definitely made it to the resort before the bus including all of our wait time for the plane.
Once arriving in Negril, there are plenty of people to help you with ganja, a ride, or whatever. The six of us shared a cab so I think it was only like $5. We arrived at Hedo about 3 pm. There are five guys totally wiped out sitting in the bench area. I asked how soon we would be like that? One guy, Jamie, took me directly to the bar for drinks while Jeff checked us in.
We booked OVN and asked for a second floor room. We were placed in 2218. The room is fine. The bathroom is very small. The shower is nice. I like all those shower heads. We had an ocean view room right by the volleyball court, very centrally located, and we were considered lucky because the room had everything: coffee pot, phone, clock (which we placed in a drawer) iron, ironing board, safe, blow dryer, throw rug, etc. We did have a king size bed, but it felt like twin beds pushed together. I actually pulled the sheet up to double check. I would recommend to the resort that they upgrade the mattresses. I have a problem with my shoulder and after five days of sleeping on the mattress (and other activities) I could barely use my arm. I was fortunate to see Lance, the famous masseuse twice while there. We arrived on a Sunday, and after dropping off our luggage (our room was made available instantly) we grabbed towels and I put on a sarong.
We passed the massage shack and Jeff and I scheduled massages for the next day. We did them together and yes, Lance has some of the strongest hands anywhere in the world. I never asked for the intimate massage but was very impressed with his talent.
While at the massage shack, I was asked as to why I wasnt naked by the massage team and explained that I was new and to give me a moment. Jeff, clearly not shy, was already naked just standing behind me. So, Jeff untied my sarong and clothes were a thing of the past. WOW!
On our walk to get the jerk chicken (we knew about it from Chris book and what time to expect it) we meet almost everyone sitting in lounge chairs on the way to Delroys Place. Some people recognized us from our pics we had exchanged, while others mustve realized we just arrived, (I tanned ahead of time because there were parts of my body that have never seen the sun a very wise $100 investment. Just include tanning as part of your budget before you go). Jeffs butt was very white, cute, but white.
I cant believe how friendly everyone was. TRULY! You read about it on the board, but it was very real. We grabbed a lounger, some chicken, our mugs to be filled, and joined in. Everyone was great. That first night, we met the group from Philly and joined them for dinner. Thanks Philly group for helping us fit in.
You know who you are. Im sure well see you folks again.
Sunday night, we participated in the newlywed type game and laughed and laughed and laughed. A bottle of rum and some Hedo bucks, were won by all. I cant remember what we did Sunday night, but I know the hot tub was part of it. The scum, a little freaky and not really my thing. So, we chatted, but not really in the tub. It was the end of Lifestyle week, so there were some holdovers and we got an eyeful. Bedtime was 3 am.
Monday, we were up for breakfast about 8:30 ish. Jeff is a chef and we found the food to be very good in the dining room. I always brought Charlie orange juice in the morning and was rewarded with some of the best eggs and omelets you could imagine. He actually came around to give me a huge hug on my last day. Respect Mon!
Breakfast every day is fantastic. I highly recommend eating lots of protein because those Dirty Bananas and Hummingbirds (by Bridgett) are all carbs. We ate a huge breakfast every morning.
Monday it was a little rainy. We hung out in a cabana most of the day, doing not much of anything, occasion PDA but mostly slept. The morning massages, started our trip off on the right foot. While rainy, we had an amazing time. It was nice to have some quiet, quality time together. We did join the nude beach later in the day and it was tons of fun. Met Julez and Kevin who became our new life long friends. Met Karen and Mike who were in the room underneath us with their own personal hot tub (we will definitely do that the next time) and had so much fun. I was glad to share in some new firsts with some of the other newbies.
I guess our decorative Christmas lights caused some illumination and made people feel like they were on display. Oh well.. you are at Hedo.
Julez and Kevin introduced us to tons of folks and the rest of the week became a blur. Thanks for all the laughter, the ton of trips at midnight down the naked waterslide, and for our quick initiation into the Slick Ass Sliders. I know we will know you guys for a long time.
Jeff is Mr. Joke Teller, and I cant believe that Ms. Southern Bell, Rhonda, went joke for joke. Our stomachs hurt from laughing for 4 days straight. I swear I think I heard every joke. They actually started to recycle them about day 4 and they were still as funny the second time around. Morgan and Rhonda, thanks for a great time! Julez was hoarse from all the laughing, but I think that was at the Piano bar. The perfect outdoor hang out spot, close to the bar, close to the bathrooms, and able to still hear the music from the dining room.
Diane and Rich, I never knew that you could know someone for three days and have your life depend on them. Rich, you are simply amazing for all the trips, tragedies, and sunburn. Diane, you have your hands full. You are a great couple and definitely made the catamaran trip worthy. I know we will see you guys again.
The rest of the trip was a blur, a good blur, but I do know that we never made it to bed before 2 am and we were always up by 9 am. I never took a cold shower, our maid, Sheryl, was fantastic. She would clean the room, hear me in my afternoon shower and bring me extra towels. She did a great job.
We kept our window open just about 24/7. The air conditioner didnt work well, but the sound of the ocean was so amazing and the breeze was perfect. Some issues that we experienced: I think it was Wednesday, but I woke up from a mid afternoon nap to our bed being invested with ants. Im not sure where they came from, but I had them all over me and lots of bites. They were the little red ones. YUK! I got up, took a shower, called the front desk and by the time I got back from Delroys they were gone. I think the ants actually end up on the maids cart from drinks that get spilled on the walkway. When the maids clean the rooms, the ants come along for the ride. I only saw one or two after that, but it was a little freaky. The staff was very prompt in their attention to the issue.
I know why you are to stay for 7 days. Day 7 is when you figure out how everything actually works. You can get a very nice cross breeze if you open your bathroom window a certain way with the window in the bedroom open. Were a little slow. Some other items we figured out: You can snorkel with the dive shack team every single day, just find out what time the boat is going out. Its great! This is not the snorkeling trip on the catamaran cruise. You can also waterski twice a day (included in your stay) and all you need to do if talk to the dive shack. Im not sure why we didnt realize this sooner, it could have been simply because we had too much alcohol and eventually you get sober and think of doing something different to do. I can only watch foursomes for so long.
The catamaran cruise is worth every dime. Do NOT do the sunset cruise. That kinda stunk. The cruise that leaves at 11 (I think) is the one you want to take. We did both cruises, and both of them ended up being nude cruises because we went with our new nude friends. While we made the sunset cruise fun, the trip to Ricks Caf was not worth it. You are only at Ricks for one hour, so there is not time to eat, nor can you just go up to Ricks to pee, you have to stay there. Some of our friends stayed on the boat to swim, which is what we shouldve done instead. The cruise was a blast, because of the people, especially Rich and Diane. Thanks Rich for saving my life. LOL
The morning cruise is fantastic. You can snorkel and they take you to these caves and you can swim in and out. The morning cruise also had the waterslide, which we didnt have on the sunset cruise. Thanks Chris Santilli for the comments about asking the kitchen staff for lunch. They packed us a very nice lunch, sandwiches and fruit for the morning cruise. One of the things that I realized at Hedo, is all you have to do is ask and ye shall receive. We were never demanding, and we were patient, and the results you get will be amazing.
Due to the rough seas that we experienced on our sunset cruise, and that crazy trip into the basket with Rich, I think I was the only person at Hedo to be completely sober and puke my guts up! Thanks Rich for helping, Thanks Julez for holding my hair, and thanks Hedo staff for making sure I was okay. Hint: do not intake more than 2 gallons of salt water at a time. Its not fun when it comes back out. Check out Dianes pictures and that last pic actually has people in it. Where you ask? Look closely.
Jeff made a special sauce from bar items and had one of the chefs at the Japanese restaurant make some of our food with this new sauce because we had eaten there three times. The chef was very accommodating and fun.
Pastafaris was not very good. The lamb chops were amazing, and the antipasta bar was good, but some of the sauces, not so good. Almost everyone we know, (including beautiful Cindy) were violently ill from eating there. We ate mostly in the dining room or at Roberts Grill. The jerk chicken is amazing and so are his hamburgers. I dont like ketchup, but the Jamaican ketchup is very good. Interesting combination of tastes.
Bridgett at Delroys took fantastic care of us all week. She was our go to girl. Her Hummingbirds are the best. If you miss breakfast shell hook you up with a drink that will make you think you had a full meal. Loads of fun was had by all in the pool activities.
A little note to the newbies, we were told about a private hot tub by the tennis courts. So one day after lunch, we mosey over to the tennis courts and find a door that has the sound of water flowing. We find this beautiful, private spot of several pools with no one around. Unbeknownst to us, we decide to get it on in the openness of the spa area, where they bring tours around. About 15 minutes into our togetherness a group tour comes through and we are told that this area is clothing optional. We clearly optioned that clothes were optional, but not the answer the spa staff was looking for. We eventually found the hot tub they were talking about, but the moment had passed. Oh well.
I was a little amazed about the openness of the Lifestyle action in broad daylight in the pool area. When it happens right above you, its a little disconcerting if you arent wanting to join the party. It made for some fun conversation, interesting voyeurism and overall criticisms. Its a whole new world if youve never experienced anything like it. We did not participate, but we had no problem critiquing said exploits.
We stopped by the hot tub every night, but not really my scene with all the floaties. We will definitely book a hot tub room on our next trip. I like the privacy that Mike and Karen had with their room. Also, when you have a hot tub room, you have an awning, so on the days that its raining you have a place outside to hang out. I think it was definitely worth the extra money. Also, we didnt have a fridge in our room. We didnt request one, but would the next time.
Other notables: Ladies, make sure to get painted. It was complimentary and Ryan is an amazing artist. She painted me twice. You will need an appt, but make that a mandatory stop at Hedo. We also dressed for all the theme nights. It was fun planning and it was fun doing. Because we dressed for almost all the nights, people would stop us to chat about what we were wearing. I think we met almost everyone at the resort at one point. Because we were there for 9 days, the first 5 days the resort was not at 100% occupancy. I really liked the feel of the week. I didnt really like when it was at 100% occupancy. You can definitely feel a difference in the people and in the staff.
I didnt allow anyone to take naked pics of me expect for Diane, and I was a little amazed at how many other people take liberty with the picture taking. If you are up in front of the group doing something you dont want your boss to see, then dont go up there, because complete strangers will be taking your pics regardless of what you think the rules are.
Everyone talks about the drinking water. I have the weakest stomach on the planet and the water was fantastic. I never drank bottled water and never had a problem outside of the salt water intake. (clearly my own fault)
I would recommend this trip to anyone. If you are trying to save a relationship, it might not be the best place to start. It is important that you are in a very healthy relationship, have open communication, and can be completely honest. Otherwise, you may find yourself in some uncharted waters and not know how to respond.
We both agree, that we have never laughed so much. We met the most amazing people (Im sorry if I missed anyone) and spent some great quality time together without all the daily stresses of life. We would go again in a heartbeat. It really is one of the best vacations ever.