So, we're Hedo-virgins no more (another experience, another cherry...).
We did five nights, and in hindsight should have done seven.<G> We did a great deal of reading as preparation, both The Book and things here; all that *really* helped.
We flew down from Atlanta at the crack of dawn Sunday March 21st. The Air Jamaica flight was maybe 1/3 full, service was excellent, and the view as we paralleled the coast for landing was inspiring. Customs was a breeze, bottled Red Stripe was so-so beer in the parking lot, and then we were off on the bus ride. As others have noted: goat, cow, shack, goat, cow, shack, goat in road, cow .... etc. My first offer of ganja was in the restroom at the halfway stop. Why me? Maybe the ponytail was a hint.
We arrived at noon, and check-in was quick. I suspect it may have been so because Carol and I hung around the front desk patiently, while the noisy crowd that had arrived with us immediately headed for the bar. We made it to the room (2132 - H block, an excellent location in hindsight), unpacked, wandered up to get lunch in the main dining hall, then availed ourselves of the ceiling mirror in the room, before stripping and heading for the nude pool.
Although we'd been naked in front of others often enough before, we had not been in a majorly nudist environment. It seemed perfectly natural, though, and, as others have observed, the friendliness factor seems very high on the nude side. Maybe it's because it's obvious that you have "joined the tribe." We hung out at the pool for the afternoon, meeting and talking, and Having Fun In The Hot Tub late in the afternoon. Draft Red Stripe is much better than bottled. Sunsets and hummingbirds are too sweet for me, but Carol likes them. I started getting the first of many stares at my rather unique jewelry Down There.
We attended the orientation at 7:00 PM, which gave us a few additional facts, but we also met someone that we ended up hanging out with a lot the rest of the week. Buffet dinner, then a 2 hour nap (we'd been up since 4:30 AM with not enough sleep the night before). The disco was dead at 11 PM (it appears that it doesn't start to get going until 11:30 PM - 12:00), so we did an hour of singalong in the piano bar (Winston has an incredible voice!) then more Fun In The Hot Tub until ca. 2:00 AM.
Monday We caught the tail end of breakfast at 10 AM, signed up for the catamaran cruise (Tues 10:30 AM) then hung out at the pool the rest of the morning. I tried juggling once again at 1:00 PM, and once again proved that I Have No Coordination. Lunch was burgers on the grill at Robert's. We did naked twister (old knees suck). We were hoping for the best tan/no tan contest at 4 PM, but it never happened. We hadn't pre-tanned, and Carol had an *excellent* shot at winning a bottle for rum for the no-tan end of things. So it goes.
And then... jerk chicken at 4:30. OMG. I have a new culinary goal on returning home (I've always been chief cook). Dinner was at the Scotch Bonnet restaurant on the prude pool patio: very spicy but good. Carol says that the jerk chicken there was a poor imatation of Robert's.
Reggae on the main stage at 9:30 PM (good band and singer) and then *really* bad karaoke at the piano bar at 11 PM. We crashed before midnight.
Tuesday We took the Catamaran cruise at 10:30 AM. This is *not* the "booze cruise" to Rick's Bar, but a clothing optional (3/4 of us stripped) cruise on a long tack out to a reef for snorkeling, then another tack to the cliffs and caves just beyond Negril, and then a powered ride home - in heavy chop. I rode the bow bouncing up to 7'. Much fun, and Carol is hooked on snorkeling.
Lunch on our return at 2 PM, then a nap (yes, we're Old Pharts), then Carol woke up at exactly 4:30 with the words "It's Jerk Chicken Time!" We did dinner at Pastafari with friends we had met, then back to the room... for at least an hour of work on Carol's PJ costume.
We had decided before we came that this was our other chance for a win. I designed a full body webwork rope harness for Carol out of 150' of 1/4" black/green/gold rope, with a collar and leash. (I just wore silk boxers, but got to lead her around on the leash.) Yes, we do have a bare, slightly perceptible (TM PtF) kinky side.
And we won, in the bondage category.
Afterwards folks ask us where we bought it. "Home Depot" was not the answer they were expecting. We cleared out of the disco at 1 AM, took off the rope (3 minutes), and headed for Fun In The Hot Tub until about 2:30 AM.
Wednesday After breakfast, we took the shopping shuttle into town from 10 AM to noon, for the requisite T-shirts etc., and met another Net contact from here on the trip. The pool was the afternoon, doing body shots, then body painting (if you are one of the folk that we took pictures of (with permission), email me!) then Jerk chicken, then dinner at Munahana. This was clearly our biggest disappointment among the 3 restaurants. The show wasn't that good, and the food all tasted alike save for the dipping sauces. The sushi and miso were good, though.
Thursday Our last full day was working on the list of Things We Have Got To Do. Rock painting at noon; lobster on the beach at 2 PM, snorkeling out by Booby Key at 2:30 (Carol's hooked), watching games on the beach (find your mate, truth or dare) as the clothed spring breakers walk by, doing their best not to look at the naked Old Folks (I mean, some of us were in our 30's... or much older<G>). The Last Jerk Chicken at 5 PM. Then buffet dinner in our sheerest-fabric-we-could-find togas. During the Talent show, Winston hauled me out on the floor during his glam-drag song.
And then... when we got back to the room at midnight, the message light was flashing on the phone. Our 10:50 AM Air Jamaica flight had been cancelled, and we were on the 3:30 PM one instead. We thus got to eat a last breakfast, rather than leaving at 7 AM. Then we spent a hour trying to get them to bring up our bags up, which arrived as we were boarding the bus. So much for Negril check-in. This was the one real foul-up that I noticed on the resort's part.
And the plane was full, with 80% of them a missionary group from East Tennessee, all dressed in orange T-shirts and praising. Poor service, with the aisles constantly full of these folk. After reaching Atlanta, we had a 3 hour drive home, arriving there about 11 PM Friday. Luckily, we had the weekend to decompress.
Things We Have Learned:
The bottles of rum that you win for contests are bar bottles: they have cheap closures that are not designed to reseal tightly. Luckily we didn't open ours until we arrived home.
Lube and Hot Tubs: we had been told on the forum here that pre- lubeing wabbily bits at the start of a day helps keep them from drying/chapping. This is good advice... but the pool and hot tub water will remove any water-based lube like AstroGlide or KY quite readily. What you want is a silicone based lube like Wet Platinum (not just Wet - that's an AstroGlide equivalent - but the harder to find Platinum). This is only slightly water soluble, yet comes off easily using shampoo (not regular soap; you need a cationic detergent, says the chemist). It greatly facilitates Fun In The Hot Tub.
Sunset: I'm one of those people who really want a map in my head of where I am. I was disoriented most of the time at Hedo, because the sun was setting in what I perceived to be the *north*. Once home, I found a map that explains much: http://www.caribbean-on-line.com/islands/jm/nbmap.shtml Hedo is #59 at the top. It's on a western-tending peninsula, while the beach at Sandals and beyond bends south.
Drinks: Scoomba makes the best vodka collins. Some of the trainees made things that are utterly undrinkable.
John & Carol counting and saving.....