Our First Trip to Hedo Hedo Virgins No More!
As first timers we hope all of you hedo vets dont laugh too much at the things we were impressed with, as I can imagine that sometime in the future we might take them for granted. But for now, here goes
We arrived at Mo Bay approx. 10 am Friday, got the bus (minivan) and arrived at Hedo by noon (stopping for a Red Stripe along the way). During check in we looked around and thought it looked nothing like what we imagined, even after reading Chris book. We were staying on the nude side, so we were on the beach by 12:30 pm and had our first encounter with Augustus (sp). We were looking for a number of people we had chatted with online so we headed to the pool and found the group (the Drunk Phuckers). Feeling as if everyone was way ahead of us, we decided we needed a drink to catch up. We received a few nude hedo hugs upon entering the pool, which at the time seemed really cool, but by the end of the week seemed as casual as a handshake. Ok, maybe not a handshake, but you get the idea. We were happy to meet Ed and Eileen, who had traded emails with us to help us prepare for our trip. Unfortunately, they were leaving within 15 minutes of meeting us. L But they left us a double raft and a Bob Marley CD, both of which got plenty of use. Within 45 minutes we had done our first slippery nipple. The weather was perfect, 85, sunny, the drinks were flowing, and we had our first taste of Roberts burgers and fries. Being virgins, full of adrenaline and short on wisdom, we postponed our power nap for our first taste of jerked chicken and were rewarded with a mini meal of chicken and fries while sitting in the hot tub (and it was extremely hot!!!). Everyone told us to take a nap at some point, so we figured it was naptime for about 45 minutes (not nearly enough after waking at 4 am to catch our flight), and then it was time for Munahana with our new friends. Nothing like getting Japanese food from Patrick the Jamaican chef. The shrimp, chicken and veggies were good, but the beef was suspect. After dinner we checked out the piano bar, waiting anxiously to see Dave. Unfortunately, fatigue was taking its toll on Gina so we headed back to the room before Dave ever showed up. We got a temporary second wind walking by the band playing on the beach and ended up in the hot tub for a while before calling it a night.
The next day we started what would become our daily routine. I got up and worked out (to get the alcohol out of my body) and Gina went down to the beach and had coffee while chatting with Augustus. She would then meet me for breakfast when my workout was done. For all of the first-timers out there, you dont want to miss breakfast of all the meals. Charlie will make you an omelet any way youd like it. Our goal for the mornings was to relax and sun on the double raft that Ed and Eileen had left for us, all the while rehydrating in preparation for the afternoon. We found our 64 oz mug was good for keeping ice water in our room or out on the raft. It also comes in handy when making a drink run for a group. Around 1-2 pm wed head to the pool, grab our fist drink and at some point grab lunch from Roberts. After lunch wed get back to our goal of trying every drink on the list. (hey, you have to have goals, right?). Wed stay in the pool until jerked chicken and then go in the hot tub. The tub got progressively colder each day and the jerked chicken sauce got hotter. At that point we decided that jerked chicken and fries were our dinner and afterward we headed back for a solid nap before waking up for dinner. Needless to say, a few nights we never made dinner, but instead took a longer nap.
That second night we attempted to see Dave again at the piano bar. He was very late, so equipped with the confidence that only alcohol can provide, I took the liberty of sitting behind the piano and hacking my way through a few tunes. The more the audience had to drink the better I sounded. Unfortunately, Junior the EC shut me down for karaoke, so we all headed to the hot tub without ever seeing Dave.
The next day while out on our raft we met a fun couple from the UK. Unfortunately, we spent so much time talking to them out on the water that I got some serious sun on the back of my lower body. Ouch! When we returned to the pool Gina ended up playing Identify that Kevin. You can imagine how she had to identify us with her eyes closed. Of course, we made it interesting by inviting 5 or 6 other guys over to the event to confuse her a bit. That afternoon at the pool they had a hoola hoop contest. Well, the other Kevin decided to show up the people who were in the contest by using another part of his anatomy to spin the hoola hoop!
We finally did get to see Dave and had a great time that night, culminating in the hot tub. The following night our group had a nice dinner at the Scotch Bonnet complete with champagne. A reggae band was playing in the main dining area and they were starting a dance contest. Gina didnt want any part of it and I went to get drinks. When I got to the bar I was pleasantly surprised to see my normally reserved wife out on the dance floor shaking it for the judges. We eventually ended up in the piano bar where Gina told them to cut me off after the karaoke version of Piano Man turned into a duet between Arthur the bartender and myself. Of course, afterwards we headed to the hot tub, which despite a steady increase in the number of single guys, was very couples or group oriented and a lot of fun. Apparently, our first night when we crashed early, two guys from the prude side came over and were acting like idiots, but other than that there were no complaints. I should also add that we had heard about the sex police. Well, I cant remember anything being broken up for the duration of our trip, both during the day and at night.
Our final night was PJ night. Instead of boxers I made my own costume, which consisted of about 8 tongue depressors glued into a cylinder to conceal my member. I threaded ribbon through it to make a belt so it would be held in place and that was my outfit. I added a couple of signs to my upper body that read, Dr. Woody and Open wide and say Ahhhh. It had to be the hedo atmosphere because its not my nature to draw attention to myself, especially wearing only tongue depressors!
Forgive me for leaving out many of the juicy details, but we wanted to protect the innocent (and not so innocent as well). Some activities I can mention here. For example, we were initiated in the grotto and some of the ladies were polite enough to allow me to have my first double butt chug. This was by far the best vacation we have ever had and for weeks afterward it was all we would think about. We met some great people and have many new friends with whom we hope to stay in touch. Ed and Eileen, Eric & Lynn, Steve & Lynn, Chad & Sonya, Jenny, Rob and Anne, Fred and Maryanne you helped make our first trip an unforgettable experience.
As far as advice for other hedo virginsWe found the rooms to be adequate, our A/C wasnt that strong and you learn early on to close the bathroom door so the room actually cools off. Yes, the reports of wildly fluctuating water temperatures in the shower are true. And to turn on water in the sink you have to turn in the opposite direction. The idea that rooms should have a TV is silly, you are only in them for a small portion of your trip and watching TV is the last thing you would be doing in your room! Overall, the staff was excellent from our maid to Scumba, Robert, Augustus, Michelle, etcThe food is fair at best, but if you can get by on a good breakfast and Roberts grill for most of your meals, who cares? In our experience, all of the negatives that people mention on the message board are mere inconveniences compared to the overall experience, which was truly amazing. We were so impressed with the first trip that we are heading back at the end of July!
Regards,