Our Trip to Hedo January 9-16^th , 1999

This whole thing started out as a Fantasy brought about by a Friend. Seven months before we eventually arrived in Paradise we were sitting in a hotel room listening to the stories of a Hedo Veteran and former Classmate. A group of us had all retired to the room of a friend to catch up on each other at our 20 year Reunion when I first heard about Hedonism II . As the evening went along and we heard more and more delicious little stories about this place so far from our everyday lives I knew we had to go. It turns out that what I had just heard was my very first "Trip Report". The next morning, I had already spent hours on the Internet researching everything I could about this Utopian Resort in the Caribbean. I also discovered what would become my home away from home on the Net.. DennyP’s Web Site. For the weeks leading up to ‘The Trip" I logged on daily and sometimes several times daily, updating my list of people going the same week and where they were from and writing Emails. We ended up meeting the best bunch of people that I am now proud to call friends and all because of this Resort and this web site of DennyP’s. (Thanks Denny for supporting the habits of all us new and old Hedo Junkies!)

Most of the Trip Reports I have read follow a familiar format and I hope you forgive me breaking formation on this one. I thought it might be more informational and entertaining to hear the lead-in to The Trip and not just how long and boring the journey to Paradise is and can be. For us, my wife and I, in looking back at the whole Hedo Experience, we really enjoyed the buildup to The Trip. The preparing and the packing , the unpacking, the Internet Shopping to find the appropriate Hedo attire (for her not me) and the process of meeting and getting to know new friends via the Internet. There is a lot of Information out there about Hedo and there are many sources to find it at.. Denny’s site of course with these Trip Reports, and the AOL Boards and many other web sites to be sure and If your going and you have not bought The Book.. "The Naked Truth about Hedonism II" you have to, It is a great view of the Hedo Experience. It will prepare you and tease you and entertain you on the Long and Boring trip.. but be sure to read it a few times long before you leave because the tips and hints are invaluable and helped make our trip great.

With all that said, we can now begin. We were really much more prepared for what was about to happen to us than we realized when we climbed down the stairs of that plane into a muggy Montego Bay afternoon. Walking that long hallway down to Customs. Showed them the passports .. "no problem Mon".. (Wow .. they really do say that). Changed in $100 US for Jamaican..(don’t bother) only used about $50 dollars worth the rest went to the kids for souvenirs and our Monopoly game was a few $500 bills short. Down another long hall to find the Superclubs desk. Sign In.. Fill out what will become our "Eviction Notice" (Read The Book) and wait for The Bus. After they rounded up a driver it turns out we will get a private ride to Negril.(Is this a Good thing?) We are shown to the BUS (which was a run down and beat up Mini van of some sort) It took 4 tries to get it started and it finally decided to turn over.(not a good sign?) I’m prepared for this I’ve heard all about the BUS RIDE FROM HELL. Bags loaded and off we go. Within minutes its raining. and not just a light rain, a Tropical Down Pour .. Monsoon like..( I know, we live in Arizona , I know Monsoon Storms) now the pot hole filled roads look flat and smooth. It did kind of help that you couldn’t see them coming and I doubt that even if he could have seen them would he have cared or maneuvered around them anyway. At one point while screaming down an open stretch of road did I drop my eyes down to check out the speedometer but not surprisingly it was not registering anything, nothing.. none of the gauges were moving just us and at 70 mph. It was at that moment that I wondered if this was where the name "Jerk Chicken" came from .. the driving habits of Jamaicans.? A driving game of some sort? careening down the middle of the road, mind you, at 70 mph AT each other. Of course Right hand drive didn’t help me because they swerve or "Jerk" the wheel the opposite of what we would. It was the experience they say it is. Be sure to do it once.. but fly out , we did and will fly both ways next time. (We went Air Negril..45 minutes late leaving but we were 30 minutes late arriving. Whew that was close!) Yes there will be a next time.. did I spoil the ending for you..? J

As we drove out of the storm and about 45 minutes into the ride he offered to stop for Beer. It was so humid that the air conditioning was spraying a fine mist rather than cool dry air. After we stopped, the door to the van slide open and there was my first true "rastafarian" Jamaican with a hand full of Weed offering ‘Smoke mon, ya need some fine smoke? Or sh’rooms??" Welcome to Jamaica.. not your ordinary Chamber of Commerce welcome but endearing none the less. The rest of the ride was fine after a beer or two and finally we arrive at the Resort just before sunset. As we unload and climb the steps into the open air Lobby we are greeted by two of our Online buddies. And what a great Welcome that made for us.. (Thanks again Jim and Randy!.) We got the key , no problem, and walked us to our room. Told us they were all going to the beach in a few minutes and they would stop back and walk down with us if we wanted .. OH God I Forgot…!!!! We have to get NUDE ….the moment we have feared/anticipated for seven months.. (see we have never visited a nude beach before never mind a nude beach at a clothing optional Resort) oh well throw everything into the ample drawers and toss the bags in the closet. Lets pull on a swim suit and do it!.. KNOCK KNOCK.. They have decided that since its so late that maybe we should go eat first and then go down to the HOT TUB later.. whew.. a reprieve! Lets eat and get a few drinks in us first.

The main dining area is more like a pavilion and is very nice all open air and very roomy we enjoyed every meal there .. the food contrary to what we had read was really very good.. all very fresh.. lots of local dishes.. and fruits and veggies and fish almost every meal (which I loved!) We never did make it to the Pastafari Restaurant. No one in our group ever even suggested it. I guess we just never wanted to wear that much clothing until we had to leave.

OK so after Dinner yes.. we did it.. we got nude in the infamous Hedo Hot Tub surely the most notorious bubble bath in all the world. Yes. There was sex in and around the Hot Tub.. and NO the Sex police were not intrusive at all. We never saw them intervene in any "action" mostly just picking up empty drink cups and discarded beach towels. And Yes it was easy being naked when everyone else is much easier than you would think and you really did hate to go get ready for dinner which meant you had to get dressed. But you usually had time for a "Hedo Nap". ( when you go you will know and if you’ve been just grin J ) Each Meal we got to meet more and more people we had chatted with online by the end of our week we were pulling tables together in the dining room for a group as large as 12. We talked and talked and talked sometimes through the Dinner shows.. (which were also very entertaining and professional) then off to the Piano Bar ( Ask Dave to sing about the ‘Big Bamboo’) then the Disco ( get them to play "Doggie" .’Who let the dogs out?? Woof! Woof! Woof!)..and then to the hot tub (no comment) or Beach.(quiet Frank!) It became a nightly ritual that we looked forward to.( and miss)

Here is a good tip, Beth discovered that the scuba speed boat just sits there all afternoon. So she ask if they would take us all out on a little cruise up the coast to The Pickled Parrot and Rick’s. Sure enough we were on our way! There is nothing like cruising up the Coast of Jamaica in a big twin outboard speed boat with a huge HEDONISM II logo and a scantily clad Scuba Girl painted on the side of it to draw attention! As we flew by all these barely populated Resorts up the Coast to Negril the few people to be seen on the beaches sat up and stared.. (OH there is the Hedo Boat I wonder what the Animals are doing so far from their Cages???) As we rounded one Point a women actually sat up and waved us to come back, looked like her resort was pretty mellow and after all Hedo has a rep! In Fact when we got to Rick’s to attempt the Cliff Dive, (It is easily a 45 foot jump, you guys all had bigger balls than I did, and that includes Margaret and Kath!) we drew a crowd out of the Restaurant. As soon as they saw the Boat out popped the Video Cameras! Well OK so one Female member of our little expedition was buck-nekked (Hey we are from Hedo and have a reputation to uphold!) Several members of our "landing party" actually made the jump and one "landed" a little harder than expected I have been told she still gets a little memory of the jump each time she sits down Then it was off to the Pickled Parrot to tackle the Rope Swing. This was a bit more sane (only about a 20 foot drop off the end of a swinging rope suspended out over the bay by a make shift support bar, no problem, mon) Except my wife learned a very important lesson when using a rope swing. You are to LET GO OF THE ROPE AT THE FARTHEST POINT FROM WHERE YOU STARTED or you will end up back where you started. Except in this case you have jumped off a cliff first, so you will end up somewhere against the cliff wall of sharp rock below where you started but above the water. She claims she just enjoyed the ride and did not want to let go, I think she just really wanted to try the Trapeze at the Resort but was afraid of embarrassing herself. Anyway she did manage to let go just shy of the cliff and did an unusual dismount off the rope kind of tumbling backwards even closer to the wall. VERY EXCITING HONEY! But the fun had just begun! Because I was next and decided her swing was enough excitement and did a rather boring ordinary drop off the end of the rope but when I came up to the surface I was not greeted with wild applause from our boat. Rather the stern direction of "DO NOT SWIM STRAIGHT BACK TO THE BOAT… There are Jelly fish in the water !!" AHH there is a downside to this beautiful clear water, the Creatures!! A few little ZAPS .( awww shoot it was nuthin’) I think that is the fastest 100 yard breaststroke I have done in years! Back in to the boat and lets be off… We also went water-skiing one afternoon. Also a perfect place for it. A large cove with water smooth as glass, waist deep water as far as 75 yards off the beach.. If was great. Give it a try.. You will have fun.

This Resort really is a non stop party. It was as advertised. But what makes it so much fun? the people.. sure the place is Paradise, Perfect weather. Perfect beaches, Perfect water.. but the Staff is also more than Perfect. Tamara and Mark are incredible (I think they work 16 hours a day ) with their abilities to get people to party (Mark's Dirty Joke Telling is a riot and Tamara doing .. well anything.. is worth watching). and really what makes Hedo so much fun is the Guests.. they are what make Hedo.. Hedo. Everyone goes with the mindset that they are going to have a great party.. and they do.. We all let our hair down and be as free as we dare. It is really a one week party or as long as you stay. You do have to pace yourself. Hey, you can rest next week. You paid to much money to come all the way here to sleep didn’t you??… By the way, the rooms were nicer than had been described and when the "Eviction Notice" appeared on our door.. Reality came screeching back.. We had a GREAT last night Thanks to Frank & Nicole, Chip & Margaret, Jim & Kath and Eric & Beth.. Two other couples that were apart our "Group"(we never did give ourselves a name did we? Maybe RD’s Gang or the Mercer Bunch?).. was Randy & Kelly and David & Laurie, they had to leave at an ungodly hour, like 4:30 AM Saturday morning so we did not get to say our Good Byes face to face with them. So to all of you, we thank you for the BEST week of our lives! Until next January that is.. and you better all plan on being there!! As the week ended we started meeting new arrivals like Chris & Melissa and Becky & Jim. I can see the advantage of going for more than a week or even going from the middle of one week into the middle of the next week since people tend to arrive on Saturdays.

We got home and it all seemed dreamlike.. and then the next day we got The Hedo Glow as we now call it.. just walking around smiling and giggling thinking about this and that.. (oh yea THAT!) then the next day or two get ready for The Post-Hedo-Blues.. then you know you have what they call DIF (Dreaded Island Fever) it took the better part of a week to shake it.. and the only relief I found was to run down to the store buy a six pack of Red Stripe and sit in my back yard at Sunset with a plate of self made Jerk Chicken (almost as good as Robert’s and Indiana’s from down at the Beach Grill. Thanks for the Recipe Jim!).. and chat online with all our new friends and send pictures back and forth.. and plan for our return. All in all it was the best We had more fun then Humans should be allowed to have!! Until next year! and all because of my 20 year Reunion and DennyP’s web site we have made life long friends

I wish Hedo sold Time shares…!!

Our Hedo Tips for First Timers:

DO take rafts- they wont be left over they are hot property!