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Magumbo and Jackie Oh!’s ever-so-excellent adventure
We didn’t want to take the “usual” vacation. Normally we go to Mazatlan, Mexico every year and Jackie takes care of all the details. “It’s fine with me if we don’t go to Mazatlan this year.”, she said. “You pick the place, book it, and take care of all the details.” After much research and tuning in to Denny’s page almost daily for six months, we decided we had to join the WWW group in paradise.
GETTING THERE
We flew from Houston to Dallas on Wednesday evening. We met Jim and Jeanie in Dallas. We were all starving so we got a kids meal at McDonalds. There was a “Woody” toy in the kids meal. Jeanie got a barrel of monkeys and promptly exchanged it for a Woody too. (Hmmm. Must be a good sign) After drinks we got to our hotel. They put us on the “odd” side of the hotel. (good sign number two)
Two typical days in paradise
Day One, Thursday - Toga Night
Wake-up call at 4:00 a.m., off to the airport, on the plane at 7:00.
After an uneventful flight the four of us found the SuperClubs desk and only had to wait 15 min. for the bus.
THE BUS RIDE FROM HELL
On the bus we met other couples that were going to other resorts. A Christian lady that was there for the week to study art was very talkative with us. She asked where we were going. Hedonism was the reply. She promptly moved to the front of the bus away from everyone else and she didn’t say another word. (A third good sign that this was going to be the greatest of adventures!)
The bus ride was uneventful. One stop for some Red Stripe and on to the resort. Due to slow cars and a funeral procession total time to the resort was right at two hours.
At check-in I noticed people getting bumped to other resorts. I didn’t argue when we got put on the prude side for a few days. Note: Mentioning the words “Denny”, “WWW Group”, and “Go Classy” do get results! We had a few drinks, ate lunch, and the room was ready. We noticed other people that were uptight and not being very helpful to the front desk staff were still trying to keep from getting bumped. If they are overbooked and you want to get a room in a timely manner, the rule appears to be:
Uptight - you might
Just chill - you will
Room 2211, Oceanside Prude.
We literally threw the bags in the room and headed for the beach.
After some sun I decided to do some exploring - of the bar.
I learned some new words like Mudslide, Land Shark, and Dirty Banana.
All of these drinks taste like a Slurpee and have virtually no effect
on you. However - the bartenders
DO keep track of how much you drink. On
your 6th or 7th drink they add a “secret ingredient”
that makes all the previous booze you drank all kick in at once.
After getting into our togas and heading to dinner, someone poured me a
drink with “the secret ingredient” in it.
I promptly excused myself and stumbled off to my room. OK, truth be known, Jackie told me I was looking rather
hammered and had better go to bed early.
After 20 or so minutes I returned to the party.
No, I didn’t miraculously sober up, I couldn’t find my room.
(See Ms. Froggy, your not the only one that gets lost in the woods!)
After being led back to my room, I crashed.
Jackie says the toga party was pretty quiet and they took waaaaay too
long to get things going. Jackie,
Jeanie, and Jim decided to go to Veronicas.
Dead there too. They
figured everyone was in the hot-tub so off they went to the hot-tub.
I guess they must have had fun at the hot tub (who wouldn’t) as
Jackie finally got back to the room about 3:00 a.m.
Day Two, Friday -
Serious Beach Time!
Upon The Lady Jacquelyn’s arrival to the room, I woke up and was sober, well rested, and hungry. She crashed and I grabbed the room key and decided to go explore. I walked to the dining room and they were closed. I asked one of the men cleaning up where I could find some food. He told me to sit down and “just relax Mon!” I did as he said and in a short time he brought me big platter of chicken, rice, and steamed veggies. I had a plate of great food and the entire dining room to myself. Life is good!
After the sun came up I walked down the beach from the prude to the nude side. When I got to the nude side I saw my first people of the day. I sat on a chair and listened to them decide what day it was. After 20 minutes they decided that last night was actually toga night and so it must be Friday. This morning would also be when I noticed the difference between the nude and the prude sides. On the nude side people sit around in groups chatting, laughing, and enjoying themselves. On the prude side there is a person, 10 chairs, a person, 10 chairs, and so on. There is a very big difference.
We laid in the sun all day. We ate food from Robert’s Grill. I went snorkeling around the rocks on the little jetty and saw a puffer fish, barracuda, lobsters, and many colorful tropical fish. I took some great pictures of the sea life with my disposable underwater camera. Yes, these things actually work!
After dinner we didn’t stay for the entertainment, but
went off to the hot-tub for “reindeer games”.
We saw a MONSTER joint being passed around as well as our first “Wallie”.
One couple under the waterfall got a standing ovation from everyone in
the hot-tub. One of the WWW
ladies brought many fun toys and treats for everyone to enjoy every evening.
Jackie loved the gummy penis treats and the penis drinking straw that
was given to her. She used it all
week long and it was great seeing some of the looks she got walking across the
prude side sipping her drink with her straw.
Every day was as great of an adventure as the day above.
We can only offer a small view of the total experience.
The best thing was the people. Finally
meeting Bob. Joking with Rupe and
Patty. Enjoying our time with Jim
and Jeanie. Finally meeting the
world renowned Denny P. and Ms. Dyan. Tex
and As. (pronounced Ass) Steve and Char, Kelly and Brian, Karen and Terry, Brian and
Amy, Bernie and Elaine, Jay and Deborah, and all the rest. There were so many great times, and great new friends.
I’ll list just a few of the greater moments.
Rupe and I swimming up to Bob and a girl he had just met,
and telling Bob what a great time we had in bed with him last night and how
she was lucky to find a man THIS good in bed.
(She took the bait and Bob had to do some fast talking I’m sure)
Chocolate after dinner nipples.
Getting WWW tattoos.
(mine lasted until Christmas morning when I scrubbed what was left of
it off)
Watching the look in Jim’s eyes as he took over the
helm of a sailboat for the first time.
Volleyball in the evenings.
Hummingbirds (real ones, not the drinks) in the flowers.
Patty explaining why she couldn’t walk.
(Stay away from position 102 next time!)
Bob’s WWW backstage passes.
Realizing that we would have to turn down Boomer’s
Magical Mystery Tour because it meant getting dressed.
Flying on the trapeze.
Seeing the trapeze put bruises on the last part of Amy’s
body that wasn’t.
Jerk Chicken in the evenings.
Nude Volleyball in the prude pool.
The catamaran trip to the Pickled Parrot, and hearing
someone yell, “Hey Magumbo!” from the cliff.
The P.J. Party was fun, fun, fun.
Thanks to everyone we met for making our vacation one of
those great things in life that you just have to keep in your heart - as there
are no words to describe the feeling. We
will see you all again real soon on the beach.