WWW2002 Winter Pre-Trip Report
EDITORS' NOTES
The following trip report is a fantasy. Many of the members of the upcoming WWW Winter 2002 trip collaborated on this report to help us get over the severe D.I.F. we are experiencing while waiting for the time when we can all be together in December. (Disclaimer: Any similarities to actual persons or events are purely coincidental hee hee)
Since the contributors of this report are too numerous to mention, we won't bother. But it is important to give credit to the person who started it all the lovely Sabrina.
For the unedited version of this report please visit the Wet Wild and Wicked message board. We hope you get as much fun out of reading this story as we did writing it.
Diane and Hazel have edited this report (for spelling and continuity) to the best of our abilities.
Introduction by Sabrina
-----------------------------------------------------------------
INTRODUCTION
Okay. Even though I have
never been to Hedo, thought it may be fun to help combat everyone's DIF to
write a continuing ultimate trip report.
Way it works: Write a small piece of a trip report and post on the board.
Other people can add sections to the report.
What do you think? I will start it and see if it catches on . . .
The Ultimate Trip to Hedo II WWW Winter 2002
Getting to the airport is usually a chore, which is why we decided to start
our vacation here. We rented a limo for our 30-minute drive. You would be
surprised what you can do in 30 minutes if you put your mind to it! Anyway,
after starting our trip with a "bang" (and making sure we were decent!), we
arrive at the airport, check luggage and go to our gate.
We get to our gate and look around for anyone we may know. We hear a large
group of people talking about body shots and think we have found the right
folks! Anyway, after further conversation, it seems as if our plane to Jamaica
is about 90% filled with Hedo folks! Hmm, this could be interesting.
Wandering around the gate, we find a group of 8 couples sitting on the floor
playing dice.
--------------------
They are playing "strip-craps" and most of them are already half-nekkid. One of the guys rolls and turns to Sabrina and says . . .
"Hey
beautiful young lady, would you like to play with us...? After we all get
nekkid we will switch the game to dirty dice, if
we don't get arrested first or they call our flight. Here, have a Dirty
Banana. Uh, no, I meant the drink not PervRoy's
appendage."
"Sorry, honey, didn't mean to make you blush. Come here and sit next to me and
I'll show you stuff." Hee hee.
--------------------
We all move to the private First Class lounge. Our flight is nothing but First Class seating (might as well dream here). Flight attendants are running around in stockings and heels, bringing around trays of champagne and shrimp cocktails. Adam rolls the Love Dice and they reveal [LICK ?]. Adam hungrily eyes the available ladies while the lovely Eve whips the drool off his chin.
--------------------
added for continuity:
A spirited game of dice continues until it is time to board the flight.
--------------------
On the plane Boy Toy asks Queen Diane if she packed the drop cloths in the carry-on bags as he is in the mood for a Mass Massage.
--------------------
Di tells Boy Toy the drop cloths are packed up. So he asks the flight attendants for one and receives it. Boy Toy, Adam and Marlboroman spread the cloth and oil it up. Naked bodies are positioned there and the massage commences. The fun continues
--------------------
The first lady on the sheet is the lovely Sabrina.
Boy Toy starts on her shoulders, Marboro Man gets
the lower back and Adam starts with the feet. Adam is still
drooling.....
--------------------
Adam is drooling so much a bib has to be used. The lovely Sabrina doesn't want the massage to stop. Is this because Adam is licking her toes??? Next on the cloth is Cherbunny. Hmmmmm. She wonders what Marlboroman will do to her?
--------------------
After Cherbunny's massage, the Queen decides she wants one WITH the Ice Princess, so she lays her nekkid body down next to the Princess. The guys add more oil to them as the flight attendants quietly step over everyone (can you imagine a floor on a plane THIS large?) serving the rest of the crew their drinks of Dirty Bananas, Mudslides, Purple Rains and Flaming Bob Marleys for the really brave souls. As the Princess and Queen are receiving their massages from the guys, their hands start to roam all over each other's bodies. It's hard to tell where the guys' hands begin, and the girls' hands end.
Debbie the Shower Queen cries "You gotta get the
Pampered Princess in there for some toe sucking, too. She really likes that!
How big is the Shower on this plane?"
--------------------
As
the Ice Princess and Queen Di are in the middle of
their oh so sensuous multi-handed massage, the Shower Queen steps out from her
HUGE wrap around type shower with her Hot Rod following closely behind her. He
is trying to keep her from dripping all over the place, but when he looks at
all the drop cloths on the floor covered with oil and
nekkid bodies, he decides a few water drops aren't going to hurt a
thing. He asks the flight attendant for a Jack Daniels on the rocks.
Make it a double, he decides. This trip to Hedo might be a bit more than he
bargained for.
All of a sudden, the cabin goes quiet, except for the moans coming from the
last seat. Who is that moaning?? Could it be the beautiful Eve?
Yes,
it's the beautiful Eve, getting ATTENTION from Adam and two others. They
are
--------------------
wearing Hedo clothes and wigs. We don't know who/what they are as they are
bent over Eve, slowly undressing her. Eve's shorts get flung 4 rows up from
where she's sitting. Her panties are hanging off her toes. Adam is frantically
searching the overhead compartment for his new digital camcorder to capture
the moment, but he's having a "hard" time. He is trying not to listen as he
hears the moans and groans that surround him. The Ice Princess and Queen Diane
are talking to God and Eve has joined in the chant ... Oh God... Oh God...
hell yeah...Oh yeah...oh, ... oh, oooh.
DON'T STOP !!!!
--------------------
Meanwhile in another row of this lushy first
class plane, DJ, the Prude Princess, is feigning a blush. She
sooo much wants to dive into the foray and
pray to Jesus herself, but something is keeping her back. She's still
pretending to be coy. As someone, she's not sure if it's Sir Blue Balls, or
maybe it's the Crown Jewels himself (she hardly cares at this point), pokes at
her back side with his manhood she gently backs up against him, and wishes
he'd rip the few remaining clothes she has OFF!!!!
--------------------
As
the plane flies over Cuba, Diane breaks out her half-thawed chocolate "fluff",
takes the Ladies of the Royal Court in tow and heads for the
Pervs
of the Royal Court. What are they going to do with that stuff !?!?!?!?
Diane, Cherbunny, Eve, Sabrina, The Pampered
Princess, The Shower Queen, Nissa, DJ, Nancy,
Sugarbabe, Lisa, Charlotte, and a few others are
on one side of the 1st Class Lounge. Jim, Partymon,
Jaime, Dave, Reno, TexJohn, Adam, Marlboro Man,
Steve, John, Dennis with a few others on the other side.....and They're
Off.....
--------------------
. .
. having the time of their lives. Happily, Diane, Cher
and Eve have all found God and DJ is not far behind.
--------------------
DJ finally finds GOD! OH GOD. She realizes that it was The Crown Jewels and her very own Sir Blue Balls that attended to her.
"Now
you can land this darn plane! I found GOD!!! "
But upon approach to the Montego Bay airport ...
--------------------
DJ turns to Sir Blue Balls (Bruce) and says " There is just one thing I must have before we land, and that is the 'Pink Pachyderm' the Crown Jewels had in Palm Springs" All of a sudden
--------------------
A
booming voice comes over the intercom "Please pick up all drop cloths and
return to your seats. We are making our final descent into Jamaica."
As the flight attendants are making their final sweep . . .
--------------------
....
the crew realizes that the in-flight movie for coach class *IS* the action in
First Class (via closed circuit camera) and everyone back there has made a
mess of the plane too!
--------------------
The
flight attendants say that we will be landing shortly and to make sure
EVERYTHING is in the upright position. With visions of home running through
their heads, the Royal Men of WWW Winter look into their laps and grin
broadly. With a shake, rattle, and roll, the wheels finally touch down in
Mobay....
--------------------
The guys realized they've been on this plane for 4 hours, and they never got to have their talk with God!!! Man, are they pissed. They make the girls promise that as soon as they get to Hedo, they have to help the guys find God, too.
--------------------
On the bus ride, after EVERYONE gets nekkid (of course Rupe stayed nekkid as the dinner napkin from the 1st class section of the plane that he was wearing as a towel wrap didn't cover ANYTHING), all the ladies start giving lap dances to all the gentlemen, who just sit there STIFF as 2x4s, switching from one to the next and on and on they go.
One by one the men are finding God
--------------------
The bumpy road and sudden stops and starts bring a mischievous grin to Ice
Prince's face. He eyes the Ice Princess, grabs her by the hips and holds her
close for the next stop and start. This has a chain reaction as all the Royal
Men grab their Royal Ladies and do the same.
This ride and this lap dancing is giving new meaning to the term: "Bump &
Grind"...heeheehee!!!
Now everyone is a little exhausted and need a LITTLE break, so a quick stop is
made for some Red Stripe & brownies, then it's back on the bus for the rest of
the ride to Hedo.
--------------------
The bus driver eyes all the ladies with a lecherous grin. He dreams of joining
the fun but can't get past dropping his clothes. The beer and brownies refuel
the engines and HEDO Magic starts again.
--------------------
Since they have now retrieved their luggage from the plane, Adam can get to
his collection of syrups that Eve found and purchased (out of her grocery
budget) for their trip to Hedo. There's chocolate, butterscotch, cherry,
strawberry and caramel. There is are also small paint brush for each
person, and they begin to paint everyone, ladies and men and then.....
--------------------
Tongues are everywhere. Men on Ladies and, Ladies on men, and ladies on ladies
and men on... (Oops! We won't go there!!!!)
More syrup is applied and the feast continues.
--------------------
As
the bus pulls into Hedo II, the vets are wondering what they have missed all
of these years taking Tim Air. Well, maybe that is another story!
The bus pulls in and everyone jumps off. No one bothers to get dressed, after
all we are at Hedo! The staff at the registration desk just shakes their heads
and smiles. This is going to be a wild WWW week!
Adam and Eve are leading the pack to the nude pool. Adam shouts "Hey, look
over there everyone! It's..."
--------------------
"
DennyP (with his 64oz mug full of Red Stripe) and
another 200 crazy and wicked Winter WWWers
gathered around Delroy's, in and out of the pool,
drinking Dirty Bananas, Mudslides, Vodka Slushes
and all those other great drinks......
Let the party continue....
--------------------
Everyone in the pool raises their glasses and toasts us with a Welcome Home! But suddenly they notice something is very different about us. We look like we've been through a hurricane, yet we all have satisfied, evil grins on our faces. We all line up at Delroy's bar to get our drinks and welcome hugs from our friends, when someone yells
--------------------
Let's check out the Water Slide!!!!!
--------------------
With full drink mugs in hand, we all head over to the new water slide. Since we all look like we were in a hurricane, we might as well finish the look! Someone has to hold the drinks as we slide. First we ask Hedo2King to hold them, but he drinks too many of them. No problem, he is still ready to play catcher at the bottom of the slide.
TexJohn
takes up a position at the top of the slide and insists on helping all the
ladies position their bottoms correctly on the slide....
(He's a pervert, you know!)
--------------------
And Nissa is first in the long line of the train.
But wait! Nissa yells, "NO, NO, NO," I want
to go head first because she saw Bruce replace Hedo2King as catcher while
Hedo2King went to refill the drinks! Then Hazel is next, she goes feet first
with legs wide open because now Bruce's face is at the bottom of the slide....
Diane is next in line. If Bruce's face is at the bottom of the slide, she's
not missing THAT opportunity of a lifetime for anything.
The rest of the WWW'ers line up and decide to go
down the slide in snake fashion, holding on to one another. While the staff
tries to warn us that the pillar supports might not hold us all (and we wonder
after licking off all that syrup on the bus ride and eating all that fluff on
the plane) we go for it anyway. We sit girl/boy/girl/boy/girl with our legs
spread wide around the person in front of us. The crowd that is gathering is
wondering why this hurricane-looking crowd is laughing so hard and they think
to themselves
--------------------
we've got to get to know these folks! They look like, one big, happy family
who deeply love each other. Where did these folks come from? How did they all
get together? They must belong to some secret club or something. And what are
they all yelling as they come down the slide?
--------------------
As
Hedo2King is leading the pack, they are yelling....."Purple Mother***kers,
Purple Mother***kers" at the top of their lungs.
The King has arranged for a shot of those nasty drinks for everyone as they
hit the bottom of the slide. We all know that no one can say NO to the King
himself. We all swallow it whole (the drink, you sillies) and take off for the
top of the slide again. This time we drag Mr. Blue Balls (Bruce) with us
rather than letting him stay at the bottom, this is going to be a record of
some sorts, we are all sure. Maybe the most drunk people on the slide at the
same time?? And then Sabrina comes up with another great idea, this time
she suggests.....
--------------------
We need to go down the slide boy/girl laying down, lengthwise, one face down,
next on their back.....you get the picture 69......mmmmmmm
what a mouthful.
--------------------
***Out of story context now ***
If
we are all lying head to toe (or is that head to crotch area?), can you
imagine the crash collision when we all hit the water?? The pool that you land
in is rather small. If 20-30 WWW'ers all come
crashing down on top of each other what will we have?? We don't want anyone to
ruin a good time by making a trip to the nurse!!.
--------------------
***Answer to the problem***
We have a couple of really big strong Vinnies
at the pool, who can remove each couple at a time to the side of the pool,
where they re-attach themselves to the couple that they were attached to
coming down the slide. That way we create a "ring around the pool."
After the last one is down and re-attached, the circle would be complete!
And everyone keeps carrying on. (God, this is getting warped...)
--------------------
So there we are ... pulled out of the pool by the strong
Vinnies ... re-attaching ourselves into a new circle of wet, wild and
wicked bodies when all of a sudden ...
--------------------
the crowd of onlookers starts yelling words of encouragement as the chain of
bodies around the pool edge is really getting into what they are doing. The
moans and groans are getting louder. Someone grabs a camera and takes a
picture as our group reaches its peak. The sounds of pleasure are like a
"wave" as people reach their peak 2X2. Hmmm our gang has broken another
record in less than an hour.
1. The most nekkid drunks on the slide at one
time.
2. The largest group orgasm the prude side has ever seen.
--------------------
Paulette at the bar starts to hose us down with Red Stripe beer from the tap!
"Get a room, mon!" she cries while trying to hold
back the tears from her laughter.
A room??? Well, the Pampered Princess & Crown Jewel's room is the first one to
be ready! Let's all go and...
--------------------
Take a Shower!!!
--------------------
Back
at the room of the Pampered Princess and Crown Jewels ... the Shower Queen
takes charge of the mass shower!
She thoroughly washes all the Royal Sluts & Pervs
with Passion Fruit -scented bath gel, making sure to get all the 'dirty'
spots.
Everyone dries off on the towels laid around the bed, getting ready for more
SPORT, and someone says ....
--------------------
"The water isn't working again. I guess we'll have to get out the body oils to soothe all those aching and throbbing body parts from the water slide."
Off the group went to ...
--------------------
the nude pool. DJ ran ahead and when the rest of us arrived at the nude pool she was happily screaming, straddled in the cool tub testing out the "jet" when who joins her?
The Ice Princess, Queen Di and the Royal sluts all vie for the opportunity to squirm over the jets. All have a look of rapture.
--------------------
As
Di rounds the corner and sees DJ in her final cry
to the Gods of the world, a smile overcomes her. I knew she had it in her,
Di thinks to herself, I just knew it. As
Di knows that DJ had to have the strongest jet,
Di moves into DJ's place as she slowly slithers to
the side. So there we are, the Ice Princess, The Pampered Princess, The Queen
of No Means No, and Queen Diane all bumping in rhythm....is it the beat of the
reggae or the beat of......
--------------------
Returning to our saga; the Royal Ladies tire of the jet and are assisted to
Queen Di and Boy Toy's room for more games.
--------------------
After leaving the jets at the cool pool all the Royal
Slutskies wobble on weakened legs to the Queen's boudoir for a mass
massage from Sir Boy Toy, the Ice Prince and Adam the General. Hedo2King, The
Crown Jewels and Prince Partymon warm up the
ladies who haven't yet found a spot on the plastic drop cloth by rubbing the
ladies' skin with oil. The Royal Pervs are not
allowed to use their hands to rub oil on the slutskies
... but the use of all other body parts are allowed
The so-called "Secret Weapon" is unveiled at last ! It's a ... SYBIAN!!!!
Yeah!
The frenzied Royal Sluts squirm all over one another, each trying to be the
first to mount the weapon and not slide off of it! The first one to
successfully mount is ... the Pampered Princess!
Queen Diane said " Let me run the controls, I promise it will be the best ride of your life."
The man-whores were given instructions on how to control the
Sybian, as they have a tendency to turn them up
full steam ahead without waiting for the ladies to catch up.
It
doesn't take long for Queen Diane to make the Pampered Princess buck so hard
that her tiara slips off her head. She dismounts into the arms of her honey
bunny, the Crown Jewels.
Who wants to ride next? The other Ladies-in-Waiting are all jumping for
their turn.
--------------------
All the wicked slutskies rode the
Sybian: Pampered Princess, Queen Diane, Ice
Princess, Prude Princess, Shower Queen, Queen of No Means No, Lady
Sugarbabe, Lady Sabrina, Eve, Nancy ... aw, shit
... All of 'Em.
Then everyone made a mad dash for the hot tub where the Ice Prince shows all
the other male "members" of the Royal Court how to point NORTH!
All of a sudden ...
--------------------
Unfortunately for the rest of the resort the insatiable members of the court, in their heat of passion, made the lights flicker and then go out. Our ladies have blown the one Negril transformer with their Sybian play and the hot tub has no bubbles. Fortunately the quick-thinking Princess Nancy puts out a summons for all BOBS (Battery Operated Boyfriends) to keep the party going....
--------------------
With
all the 'members' pointing North and all the BOB's
the ladies have no problem finding something to mount. Even in the dark these
ladies have a talent for finding the Royal lances ... LOL.
The ladies are all moaning and sighing so LOUD that they can be heard at the
Point Village and the Grand Dildo.
The sounds of partying reach a fever pitch and then the LIGHTS COME BACK
ON!!!!
Yikes ... everyone is busted ... but no one seems to give a damn.
--------------------
The Negril Police charged the royal ladies of the court with creating a disturbance, and much to the ladies delight handcuffed them. While there was no room for this crowd in the current prison, they were thrilled to be held in the old dungeon...
--------------------
of
hedo2king's room.
All the ladies must now serve their sentence in the King's room and their time
is to be spent servicing the royal men.
--------------------
We are all yours King...shall we get on our knees to service you?
--------------------
The Ladies are
delighted with the king's hospitality, he serves up many a plastic jug of
Purple Motherf&@#ers and they play love dice
using the loaded Royal pair that always come up "Suck Jim's Dick".
After many hours of merriment the following conversation is overheard.
PAMPERED PRINCESS: Princess Nancy, King Jim is a fine host and we have had a
grand time but there is definitely something missing.
PRINCESS NANCY: Other than the fact that it has been 3 hours without a
massage, there does seem to be something else but I can't manage to get my
hand's on it.
PRINCESS DJ: I've got it! There is a definite absence of girth!
PAMPERED PRINCESS: Yes DJ that's it!!!
PRINCESS NANCY: We must summon our men to post bail and return at once to
Hedo.
No need to post bail! The Texas brigade of TWayne & TexJohn show up to set the ladies free, (although some of the ladies still insist on continuing to wear their handcuffs.) Everyone heads back to the nude pool because it's 6:00 and time for jerk chicken. Yee Ha!
--------------------
The group returns to
the nude pool to a horrific scene. It seems that in the absence of the WWW
Royal Court the Evil Emperor Vincent the Prude has conquered the former nude
side. There are hundreds of his henchmen dressed in wife-beater t-shirts,
long baggy boxers and adorned with gold chains.
Instead of Dirty Bananas, Vodka Slushes and
Purple Rains, Delroy is forced to serve only
Jolt Cola and Protein Shakes. Instead of the 6:00 jerk chicken and fries,
Robert is serving Metrex Bars and Stacker 2
supplements. The soundtrack to Saturday Night Fever can be
heard blasting at 10 volume and a TV has been brought in for the big match
between Stone Cold Steve Austin & the Rock.
Many of the henchmen
are yelling "Cannon Ball" and diving into the pool.
A few remaining WWW'ers who haven't yet been
banished to their rooms sit stunned on the lawn covered with towels. They
are sad to report that Denny has been abducted and held hostage in the hot
tub men's room, ankle deep in the bathroom floor water.
What will our WWW heroes do?
---------------
Oh no!!! Our most
Exalted Emperor Denny is being held hostage in the toilet !?!?!?! Horrors!!!
I think that we need to call upon our militia ... the Major Pain in the Ass
and the General Pain in the Ass ... as well as the Texas Brigade.
I have every confidence that they'll be able to come up with a quick and
effective strategy to conquer those freakin'
Vinnies.
------------------
The Major & General along with 22 or so of their closest confidants squeeze in to a reservation for 8 at Pastafaris and begin to set the battle plan, knowing they have two of the finest foot soldiers available to them, Private Parts and Corporal Punishment.
--------------------
OK, so the 24 (squeezed
into seating for 8) brave man-whore souls start their carbo-loading and plan
their attack of rescue.
In the meantime, the Royal ladies, knowing that our men will rescue our
fearless leader swiftly and efficiently, return to the
Sybian room.
The men have all their
strategy figured out...they will send the ladies in first, to de-pants the
Vinnies (knowing the ladies are totally worn out
from the Sybian at this point), and while they
are being distracted, the men will rescue Denny from that horrific bathroom
floor water. As everything starts in motion.....
--------------------
Disaster strikes. It was a trap, Denny's been moved and the man-whores are stuck in the men's room. A scream is heard, the Vinnies have Queen Diane and the Sybain, Now all the royal ladies are screaming and are racing towards Sandals to ....
--------------------
Rescue Diane and the Sybian, capture the Vinnie Emperor and hold his sorry pathetic butt hostage until they release our Exalted Emperor Denny and all our man-whores!!!
--------------------
In the race towards Sandals, two of the Vinnies trip on their shorts, they are soooo long. As they fall flat on their faces in the sand, the royal ladies learn what they watched on TV as children, and kick sand in their faces. As soon as they look like a few cat turds in the sand, the royal ladies are off to rescue their man-whores from the dreaded bathroom floor.
--------------------
Denny has been rescued
from solitary confinement from the Sandals beach bar, where he was forced to
wear clothes and drink Shirley Temples.
After de-pantsing some more
Vinnies at Sandals ... and turning them into cat
turds by kicking sand in their faces ... Queen Diane and the rest of
the Royal ladies high-tail it back to Hedo to deal with the remaining
Vinnie monsters who have been left behind to
guard the nude hot tub.
Upon returning there it is apparent that the Royal
slutskies will have to rely on their "talents" to seduce the young
dumb Vin-sters. It is comically easy for the
women to make the enemy drool with lust. After whipping them into a frenzy
the Shower Queen cries out "let's give 'em a
bath, girls!"
One by one the Vinnies are pushed into the pool.
The boys are bound and gagged into one huge knot of writhing boy-flesh,
baggy pants and gold chains in the pool.
Queen Diane runs over to the men's bathroom and uses the
Sybian to break down the door ... thereby
rescuing the man-whores.
The men escape the bathroom and round up the last of the
Vinnies and banish them to the Point Village.
The women cheer them on (even though we did all the rescuing ... tee
hee).
Now it's time to get back to some serious debauchery
--------------------
After our valiant
rescue effort, we all realize it's time for the WWW Catamaran Cruise. We
gather our few belongings (massage oil, sunscreen, and a few
BOB's) and head down toward the dock. Here we
meet up with all the other WWW'ers and grab a
spot in the front of the boat. As our man-whores graciously get all the
ladies their drinks and settle in themselves, the boat pulls away from the
dock and the warm Caribbean breeze is felt against our
nekkid bodies.
As we are seeming to float thru the water, suddenly
--------------------
We realize that we've
come to an abrupt halt. The Ice Princess and her Prince have set the anchor
and jumped off the catamaran swimming back to Hedo for something they left
behind the drop cloths!
That Ice Prince ... he's bound and determined to have his mass massage ...
and figures there's enough space on the deck of the catamaran to lay out at
least 5 gigantic drop cloths end-to-end.
A wild chorus of cheers erupts as the WET, WILD and WICKED couple return to
the catamaran with their precious cargo ... wOO
hOO!
The drop cloths are laid out and a gallon of oil is spread on each one. The
man-whores pull on their massage gloves, and the Boy Toy brings out his
flogger (he knows the Pampered Princess really likes it ... tee
hee).
Who's the first to dive in?
--------------------
Then Ice Prince grabs the Ice Princess and lays her down on the oiled sheet. He then takes a hold of Queen Di, Shower Queen, Queen of NO MEANS NO, Prude Princess and the rest of the Royal Ladies and lines them up next to each other, on their backs. The Ice Prince greases himself, and slides over all of the Royal Ladies using his body to start the MASS MASSAGE. The rest of the Royal man-whores decide this is a pretty good idea since some of them forgot to bring their gloves, and they proceed to give us full body massages using their slick bodies as massage tools.
-------------------
As the Ice Prince moves from one lady to the next the Royal men follow suit. One after another grease up and slowwwwwwwwwly worm their way across the ladies. Stopping to tweak a n.....e here and there. Ooooohhhhhhh the Royal ladies start moaning wanting more
--------------------
At this point the
newbies to WWW ask when is it going to be their
turn to get "initiated"?!? We await your commands, oh Royal Ladies.
--------------------
AAAAWWWWWW a wish for
commands.
Hedo2king and the Queen of "No Means No" have decided upon a solution for
the initiation of the newbies.
Hedo2king gets his way with all the newbie women
Queen of "No Means No" gets her way with all the newbie
men.
--------------------
Queen Diane asks the
Queen of "No Means No" and Hedo2King "Can you truly initiate ALL of
the newbies that have joined our Royal Court? We
have Steve & Sabrina, Stacey, SugarBabe, and now
Pat & Lynn. Won't you be too tired?"
Personally, I think we should have lead them to the center of the oiled drop
cloths on the nekkid Cat Cruise, had all of the
Royal Ladies oil them up, then start the WWW Welcum.
Then the Royal Man Whores could join in with the initiation of the New Royal
Ladies, while we take care of the New Royal Men Whores....
--------------------
So .. we have now
initiated all new members of the Royal Court and toasted them with shots of
Purple Mother F***ers. The Cat Cruise is coming
to an end as we see the Hedo lights ahead. What is this Wet, Wild, Wicked
group gonna do for fun tonight?
--------------------
As the catamaran pulls back to the dock, we all head back to the hot tub. TexJohn decides it's time to take a nap to get ready for the evening activities. And then
--------------------
And then....NO naps! Naps are for sissies. You can sleep when you're dead. If anyone goes to take a nap and a member of the Royal Court finds out, it will spread like wildfire and you will be assessed a PARTY FOUL of the worst kind. Your punishment will be enjoyed but worse than you can imagine. We've already mentioned floggers and massage oil, add to that the whips, chains and handcuffs that our dear friends Edie and Jerry will be toting along.
--------------------
A car wash is starting in the hot tub, must be time for us all to get cleaned up before Jerk time (the chicken, you pervs!!). Then again, the Boy Toy has an idea about jerking, and it's not the chicken. What are we going to do with this man?? Shower Queen runs over and is insistent on being the first Queen thru the car wash, as she has this totally 'clean' fetish. As she passes her smoke to the person behind her, and begins her descent down the line of the washers, we hear her moans and it sounds faintly like
--------------------
Her Hot Rod is helping
her in the shower, and he ain't only using
soap!!! We hear the unmistakable hum-buzz of a water-proof BOB in the
shower!
Hey!!! Quit hogging the shower ... and the BOB ... we all want our turn!!!
--------------------
After all the ladies finished showering and using their BOB's they required drying. The Royal men stepped forward and commenced to tongue dry the ladies. Needless to say this caused
--------------------
the Royal Ladies to collapse into a withering frenzy...
--------------------
of wanton lust. They grab every and any c..k and p...y with arm's reach. The day and night wore on. The next morning the Royal court was
--------------------
found sleeping on the lawn next to the hot tub. The staff had brought out mats and sheets for them to take a few hours of needed rest under the beautiful Jamaican night sky. Upon awakening, Shower Queen yelled, "showers for the entire Royal Court in my room."
--------------------
The entire Royal Court
is cleaned and dried again (damn, do we all take a lot of showers or WHAT?)
and realized we need some food.
We try to figure out what day it is and since yesterday was the Cat Cruise,
today must be Tuesday....yee haw...PJ night!!!
We decide that we all need to wear one set of PJ's
to breakfast and save the really slutty ones for
tonight. We all meet for breakfast dressed in our conservative (yeah right,
with this group) PJ's for breakfast at 10:15
(screaming in under the 10:30am deadline) and somehow all of our food turns
into body parts as someone has started a food sculpture in the middle of the
table. The melons are for the boobies, and the plantains are for the...err,
the man parts. The ackee and
callaloo are used for hair (both for the head
and other parts). The staff is starting to gather around to see our 'food
sculpture' and lots of laughs are had and pictures taken. We eat the people
we just made. OK, enough of that, we have some food in our tummies, it's off
to the beach we go
--------------------
The Royal court is greeted w/ a round of applause our upon arrival at the beach. The party starts again when someone yells....
--------------------
"Hey, there's Dennis,"
aka Superman, aka
Dense, and now aka 'Fatboy'.
"Look he's gotten so fat he is having a 'hard' time getting out of his wet
suit." So all the Royal Ladies proceed to assist him by applying
saliva to all parts needed to get the suit off him. Debbie says, "Be
careful ... maybe Superman's 'big hose' is stuck in that wet suit." ![[Big Grin]](www2002_winter_pre_trip_report_files/image001.gif){kind=small}
--------------------
At that moment Superman's hose springs free and all the Royal Ladies
--------------------
...gasp in amazement. We've never seen a hose like that before!
--------------------
The Royal Ladies have Superman surrounded so the Royal Men can't see. The Royal men's imaginations are running rampant. How big/small, long/short and innie/outie is Superman's hose?? Eventually calmer heads prevail and the Royal men settle down to a round of
--------------------
Jenny's brownies! The Royal men know that a lovely day at Hedo has to include a plate of Jenny's brownies. The Royal men had made a phone call and had them delivered to the nude pool (hey...it is a fantasy!) The guys proceeded to feed brownies to the Royal ladies.
--------------------
Oh, this is going to be great. The Royal ladies have been kind of tame up to this point. Now when they catch a little buzz from the brownies, they are going to really get wild!
--------------------
Pretty soon, there are
only brownie crumbs left on the platter and a strange silence hangs over the
nude beach. Everyone hangs in their own little world for a few minutes,
enjoying the day and the spirit of Hedo.
People start to talk once again and Hedo2King & Queen of "No Means No" are
sad that there are no more Virgins to initiate. Some one cries out "Let's
get our wigs and dress up so no one recognizes us! We can go over to Sandals
and lure over some new Virgins for initiation!"
So, a good half of the nude beach head back to the rooms to get "dressed"
for this new caper...
--------------------
Later we all arrive, dressed, at the nude pool. In our laid-back, brownie-induced euphoria we suddenly remember that the folks over at Sandals are real duds and haven't got a clue about having a good time. Also, the Royal Ladies are having a hard time balancing on their FMP's. Plus, we haven't had clothes on longer than 15 minutes to eat breakfast. But.....the Prude area is a lot closer. After all, this is Hedo! Our prudes are better than the most wild one at Sandals!!! The entire Royal Court decides to invade the Prude area of our home to scout out prospects to convert and initiate to the party side!
--------------------
The Royal Ladies waltz into the prude pool area looking for potential converts. The Royal Men follow suit. A few are found and conversion begins. What should the initiation be? Public strip contest for
--------------------
for Hedo Bucks. We
know those prudes will do most anything for Hedo Bucks. There are a few
drunk ones that want to play, so we convince them to come down the path to
the fun beach. We stop at the ever-famous NUDE BEACH sign, and we all rip
off our clothes (God knows we are tired of them by now) and wigs and get
back to the party. "Show me some Pussy" is jamming on the CD, so the Royal
Ladies all jump on the bar, and do what we are told. Pretty soon, the prude
newbies are on the bar showing all they've got
too. Lynn, Sabrina, and Sugarbabe are leading
the pack and showing the most recent newbies how
to do it!!!!
The song ends, everyone jumps off the bar and
--------------------
... lead the Prudes
(soon to be Nudes) over to the cleverly altered Nude Activities Chalkboard
and continue working with their obsession of the almighty Hedo Buck. Today's
attractions:
Tuesday, December 10, 2002 Nude Beach Activities
*Nude Twister $10,000 Hedo Bucks
*Body Part Bingo $15,000 Hedo Bucks
*Pick Your Mate (no hands allowed) $25,000 Hedo Bucks
*Sybian Adventure $Hedo Bucks accumulated
according to Nude Beach Vote
All those Hedo Bucks are just too much to resist! Suddenly, a woman in a
timid voice says, "I would like to try the ...
--------------------
She says I'd like to
try the Nude Twister! After a left foot green and a right hand red in
the midst of a mass of humanity she breaks into the song from 'Young
Frankenstein', "OHHHHH sweet mystery of life at last I've found you...." Yes
she's hooked forever. Never again will she be a prude. All of her formerly
prude buddies ask how to become a part of the fun group. We tell them it's
simple. All you have to do is.....
--------------------
have a sense of humor and be half way insane to get along with this group...that, and take your clothes off. All the clothes come flying off, and as TexJohn picks them up, he hands them to his lovely bride, Princess Nancy and tells her to go hide them. They won't be needing them again.
--------------------
We forget what happened after that (remember this IS a trip report, and how
many lost hours are in most trip reports), but it's PJ night. All the Court
shows up in their PJ's looking very Royal
tonight. There was DJ and Bruce wearing only....
--------------------
Their towelettes, they want to win the tiniest
towel award. While in the corner sits Steve and Char, peasants, not
invited into the Royal Court (oh you guys can be cold).
--------------------
Queen Diane welcomes Steve & Char into the Royal Court with open arms.
**DOINK** (clubbing them each with her scepter) Queen Diane decrees, "I deem you both Royal Subjects. Steve, you get to be Prince Ducky." (Those who were at WWW last year know why. Just ask TWayne...it has something to do with the MIM [man in motion] contest. I've heard that TWayne is planning a revenge MIM last minute entry this year!!!).
"And Princess Char, we'd have no other."
--------------------
***back to the story***
There was DJ and Bruce
wearing only....Their towelettes, they want to
win the tiniest towel award (Editor's note: How do you guys come up with
this stuff, I about fell off my chair on that one!)
....which of course they win hands down.
And over in the corner is the Hedo2King and the Queen of "No Means No"
wearing only.....
--------------------
... their nipple
jewelry and a dozen or so strands of Mardis Gras
beads ... because they want to win the "Best Accessorized" award.
Surprise, Surprise ... they DO!
And over in another corner is Shower Queen and Sir Hot Rod wearing...
--------------------
nothing but shower caps and soap on a roap. TWayne & Thea, the Duke and Duchess of Texas, enter wearing...
--------------------
cowboy boots and
10-gallon hats with a Texas flag draped over their shoulders ... and nothing
on underneath! Woo Hoo!
Then our most beloved Queen and her Boy Toy enter. Boy Toy is wearing
a spa robe and Diane is wearing a sheer silk robe. They both
seem to keep opening up their robes so that they can FLASH US!!!
Next we see the Ice Princess and Ice Prince wearing faux polar bear bikinis.
Then General Adam and Princess Eve arrived decked out in...
--------------------
wide brim straw hats and the widest Damn smiles you've ever seen, singing "Lets get this party started". Right behind them is the Pampered Princess and our CROWN JEWELS
--------------------
wearing only a
diamond tiara on her head and he is carrying a small brightly decorated box
of 'jewels' in front of his royal man parts. He looks somewhat like one of
the three wise men without clothes.
Then enters Sir TexJohn and the lovely Lady
Nancy wearing
--------------------
Cowboy/cowgirl boots and huge smiles on both ends of their torsos...!!!
So then, Here comes Zilla & Duck, wearing
--------------------
Back packs ... of
course!
Immediately following are Rupe & Patty wearing
red, white & blue loincloths and top hats!
Then comes Prince Partymon & his Princess Nancy
wearing ...
--------------------
His sumo wrestling garb
from FILP cartoons...LOL, and Princess Nancy is dressed in one of her
wonderful sheer beaded tops, a thong and a big ol'
smile on her face. After all the awards to the Royal Court are handed out, and
we have more Hedo Bucks than brains, Prince Partymon
(being the demented soul he is) rounds up all the Royal Court and orders them
to the hot tub. He yells "Everyone bring a pitcher of your favorite
con[cock]tion for body shots in the hot tub."
We naturally bring 'wet pussies' (the drink, you sickos)
with the appropriate ashtrays to drink them out of. We realize we must pour
them out of the ashtrays and onto someone's body, and we decided it's
Sabrina's turn to start off the festivities. We lay Sabrina gently on
one of the mats by the edge of the hot tub, and decide she's woman enough to
handle two body shots at a time. We pour them gently on her.
--------------------
After the first two shots
are disposed of by hubby Steve and that sick-0 TexJohn....two
more are applied and taken care of by
--------------------
the Ice Princess and Ice Prince, as he is being pulled by his 'loin cloth tail'. The Ice Princess pours her favorite Greenland shot of Carrot Cake on the willing subjects, then she and the Ice Prince lap it up eagerly. The next ones to undergo this fabulous treatment is
--------------------
"Poormepoorme"
Lynn. We are still trying to figure out why she's a poor one, as we've seen NO
evidence of that so far. She lies down in Lady Sabrina's place, and the royal
court proceeds to cover her with body shots and alternatively licking them all
off.
--------------------
Maybe we should head on over to the trampoline.
Queen Diane says "There's
a trampoline here? Where the hell have I been??
I want to find the private small hot tub that I've heard is new on the nude
side. Anyone know for sure where that is?? But I'm leaving all the Royal Court
(except one) at the slide. I want to go find some quiet time"
--------------------
Now Diane is bound and
determined to find this trampoline. She and Boy Toy take the lead, and the
trampoline is spotted, which brings back memories of 6th grade gym class and
the "spotters" - but it sure is much more fun nekkid!
Anyway, Boy Toy hops up on the trampoline and starts showing off his 6th grade
moves - front flips and high jumps. Don't worry, the ever present "spotters"
are there, doing more spotting than is actually needed!
"Boy, this trampoline is really big!" claims Diane.
(SECOND EDITORS NOTE** No one realizes how horribly
visual this one is!!) Cherbunny
decides that what this trampoline needs is a gallon of scented body oil! Who
needs the tarps? She races back to her room, and returns with the oil.
The oil is poured, and...
--------------------
***off the story line for a moment***
Rupe
& Pat are still trying to figure out why they were wearing red, white, and
blue loin cloths with top hats.... and how someone else took top prize for the
smallest towel?
They wonder if it was really they on this trip.
--------------------
***back to the story***
All the royal court somehow finds their rooms after PJ night, and we awake on
Wednesday, knowing it's Trey and Renata's wedding
day. They got engaged at last years WWW trip. We are still asking
her why she said YES!!!!
Their wedding is scheduled for the nude beach in the mid morning near the
jetty. Queen Di is in charge of getting them both
up and awake before 9am....thank God Renata gave
her their room key the night before. We kick Trey out of the room and let the
other Royal Men keep him occupied for a while the bride dressed for her
special day. The bride is dressed and looks ABSOLUTELY LOVELY. She looks
almost too good for that man of hers, but then again, he's pretty awesome too.
He walks from the beach side, as she walks from the pool side, and they meet
on the jetty....10am, and it's the ONLY time we are all on time all
week. We listen to their vows, and swear they are the happiest people we know.
As more than one tear falls into the sand, we all congratulate them which
gives everyone the right to kiss the bride, and the Royal Ladies all the
excuse to kiss the toad....err, I mean the groom. They have a wonderful
reception in Veronica's which we all attend. Soon Trey decides that the
wedding cake should only be eaten OFF Renata.
He lays her on the table, and places pieces of cake all delicately around her
--------------------
so all the Pervs can proceed to royally eat cake....
--------------------
As the delicious cake is
being eaten off the beautiful Renata someone
mentions that the Nipple Measuring Contest and Mr. Johnson contest are
scheduled to begin at the Nude Pool right after lunch.
The various judging committees have to finalize the rules of the contests
while the contestants need to primp and get ready for the show. The Hedo steel
band will lead the parade of contestants to the pool where the first part of
the nipple measuring contest is ready to start. Queen Diane steps to the mike
and ......
--------------------
.....and calls the judges
and fluffers to the pool. The Ice Prince makes
sure he has his precision measurement tools (vernier
caliper) as these measurements have to be exact! The
fluffers start prepping the ladies. The Ice Prince starts to
measure, but WAIT! No one has pen, pencil, paper or even crayons. How are we
going to write down the measurements?
--------------------
Queen Diane comes to the
rescue! She has her jar of chocolate sauce and paint brush and applies the
numbers on the ladies chest. But there seems to be a problem. The Boy Toy is
busy licking the chocolate sauce off the ladies and we have to start again.
Hmmmm....this seems to be a good thing as the
women are responding to all of this attention are now getting BIGGER
scores! The Royal Men can't wait for their turn on this game...........
--------------------
Ah, the Worthless
Princess has brought latex paint to the pool so that the judges can
permanently affix the appropriate score to the ladies in waiting. Now the
ladies can proudly display their score(s) to all that are present. OH, what is
happening? Queen Diane has taken the paint and is starting to paint
--------------------
...The scorecards for the
men's portion of the contest. Using some large leaves that we have gathered,
Diane paints up the scoring system for the panel of judges.
Meanwhile, Cherbunny goes to the bar and starts
gathering the ingredients she will need for the body shots to add further
"excitement" to this contest.
The men start to line up, and the fun begins!
--------------------
***added for continuity***
After lots of fun and frolic the Royal Ladies declare that the men's contest has ended in a tie. ALL the Royal Men are tied for first place!!! Yay!!!
As the days drag along, one day blurrrrrs into the next. Some people wake up at the crack of dawn, some wake up at the crack of noon, and some wake up at the crack of their new best friend. Some folks jump into every game and burn out early each evening, and some are like the Energizer bunny... they keep going and going and going....
As the day gets closer to the dreaded departure date, people try to block it out of their minds. This much fun can't be coming to an end, not yet! The entire group gets together in the hot tub the last night before departure for a group NBH and a group photo and then...
------------------------------
...a record-setting picture is taken! Well one thing leads to another and I am afraid yet another record has been broken.
Needless to say, there are no longer any virgins left on this trip. Everyone starts talking about how much fun was had by all and how no one can wait until next December.
A vote is taken, and we officially decide that we will all meet stateside several times this next year, just like we have this past year and possibly return to Hedo for the Summer WWW to break more records and meet new friends. We just can't keep all of this fun to ourselves!
So we all raise a glass, and toast to NBH's and new memories come July 2003 with the WWWers of summer.
THE END!