A Hedo Virgin No Longer
My WWW 1999 Trip Report
by, Shelli (a.k.a. Witchy Woman!)
Sometime in January, I woke up and decided that after 4 years of being together, Chris and I HAD to be married by the year 2000. Don't know what the motivation was, but it worked! He agreed and then the steamroller that was our Wedding Plans began to run over our lives! We picked a date…thanks to careful calendar tracking (Ladies, I'm sure you've all done it at one time or another!), picked a hall, found a Reverend who would marry a lapsed Catholic like myself and then….it was time to pick a Honeymoon destination.
Chris, being the accountant that he is, started surfing the net. We found the SuperClubs site and Hedo became our choice. The travel agent tried her hardest to talk us out of it…she said there would be hurricanes and that Mexico would be better. But we would not be swayed! Hedo it was!
We would arrive there on July 11 and stay til the 18th! I was nervous…so was he. We booked Nude Side but agreed that if we were uncomfortable, we'd ask to switch to Prude! If we only knew!!!
Shortly after booking, we stumbled onto www.dennyp.com. Little did we know that we'd stumbled onto one of the greatest, friendliest, most accepting, down to earth, fun folks we'd ever meet. I ventured into the chat room one night and was addicted…the rest, as you all know is history!!
Enuff of that…onto the trip….
We landed in Negril at around 1:30 on Sunday afternoon. After I unclenched my hands from the seat arms…something about seeing only high grass on either side of the plane during landing does that to me! We deboarded the plane and found our bags and a taxi for the "long" ride to Hedo!
Shaka greeted us at the entrance and NEVER forgot my name for the rest of the week! She was a riot from moment one and I knew then and there I would love the place! Of course, the wait for our room kinda worried me, but we stuck it out and hit the dining room!
The first face we saw belonged to Ro the Impaler! Yes, I knew it was Ro by the tell tale metal-ware!
He was a friendly way to start the trip!! Shortly after that, I ran into a whole group of WWW folks in the lobby…Glenn, Lucy, Steve, Shaunda…god, I can't remember who else was there at the time...but I still have the little blue pencil topping penis that Shaunda gave me! Mark and Clis were next and I must confess I thought they were stand-offish when I first met them…boy was I wrong! Turns out they just completed the "trip from hell" and were in a daze! A day's rest later and they were one of the nicest couple's we know!!!
I met Denny when I went to the front desk (AGAIN) to inquire about our room! Feeling as if he were a dear old friend, I was greeted with a big hug and a kiss!
After we checked in—it was straight(well sorta—we kinda got lost and toured the Nude side a bit) to the NUDE POOL! I think it took me all of about 5 seconds after I saw all those familiar faces in the pool to whip off the clothing! Some strange memory hit me about promising to move to the Prude side if things weren't great on the Nude side, but I blew it off!! (My first wet, naked hug belonged to Diane—thanks Girlfriend for all the pre-wedding support and friendship!! I couldn't have lasted without you and Denny!) I got a Purple Rain from Delroy(or was it Mr. Scumba?) and then the party began!!!
We met so many nice folks…some we'd chatted with on line, some we hadn't…if I don't mention everyone, don't be offended…I chalk it off to post-wedding insanity!!!
Two doors down from us was HedoJay…who became almost like a third of our couple at some points during the trip! (and if one more person asked me if we were a "threesome" I was gonna scream….no, we weren't!) I'm not complaining, mind you, Jay's a lot of fun! I hope he liked the birthday present Clis and I gave him…after all it isn't everyday you get a DOUBLE BUTT BEER CHUG!!! For those of you that missed it, I'm sure there are enough pictures floating around!!
Oh, almost forgot…Glenn and Lucy…Gum and Bette! The folks responsible for our trip on Tuesday…or what I like to call GUM'S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE!! It was a lot of fun! My kids loved the pictures of Jurassic Park! The light house provided some more great picture opportunities…got a great group shot there! Would have been better if we could actually get INSIDE…but, hey, it's Jamaica…no problem! The highlight of the trip was "Mr. Kenneth's Sips and Bites"….and the wonderful "food" they served there. Best damn brownies I ever ate!!! Thanks, Gum for doing something that nobody in high school ever could…getting me stoned!!!!
The PJ Party was Tuesday night! I got some great pictures! Most memorable…Jeff-the Glitter Boy, and Boomer's "cock". Many many thanks to Rob and Damian for my wonderful boa and Chris' mesh jockeys! Not only did he WILLINGLY put them on that night, he wore them on the cruise too!
(He hasn't worn them since, tho…gonna have to work on that one!!!)
Wednesday was the Sunset Cruise! What a blast! I got to watch my husband of all of 5 days be totally suicidal and jump off a cliff…(thanks Greg and Kathy and every one else who offered to take me home!!!) Of course, to be fair, to make up for scaring the crap out of me, he bought a Corona (I'd been dying for one all week)and swam back to the boat with it! What a guy! Then on the ride back to Hedo…I got a wonderful foot rub…okay…so it was a foot, calf, thigh and breast rub…but who's counting! I've already put aside my money for next year! Kathy…are you gonna be helping out with the massages again? Before the Cruise, we got a chance to all gather in the hot tub and honor Denny P…the man responsible for getting us all together! I am honored to know you Den and we both really appreciate all the work you do!! We luv ya, Man!
I was really proud of myself. Except for a little Brownie over indulgence…I'd done fairly well with my alcohol intake and had not totally trashed myself all week! Well, Thursday put an end to that! Note to self: Don't play beer drinking games next summer!!! At some point in the afternoon, Mark finally managed to pull off one pre-planned activity…the Red Stripe Beer Drinking Game. Ever drink about a case of that god awful brew in like an hour? I did. Oh, yeah, did I! Then, at the end, they made us lay down, poured some sticky stuff on us and had people lick it off. I'm not sure who licked what off of what, but I liked it! Til they made me stand up! Okay, what equilibrium???? After washing off the "sticky stuff" in the ocean, Chris, in all of his questionable wisdom, directed his drunk, stumbling wife out of the ocean and back to…what? The pool? The cold Jacuzzi? Hell no, he dumps me in the HOT TUB! Okay, take a drunk and dunk her in the hot tub…smart huh? I owe Clis a million dollars for that Pepsi she got me when I first arrived!!! I remember eating jerk chicken…feeding it to Dan…and maybe Jay….then dancing(and falling) in the fountain with Sharon!!! I was told a lot of folks were surprised to see me at the Toga Party that night!
The Toga Party…god, never thought I'd see Chris tie a satin cord around "Mr. Happy" and let me drag him around the room by it! Of course, I was wearing some kind of a diaper thing…Note to self: Don't let two drunken men tie your toga next year! Hey, at least we won a bottle of some kind of booze that night!!
Saturday, our last day, started with a Beer Chug and ended with dinner at Pastafari's with Mark, Clis, Denny, and Diane, then sitting in the hot tub til (nearly) dawn with Mark, Clis, Steph, and Boomer! A wonderful way to end a wonderful week!
Let's see…(this rambles…and I like to pretend I'm a writer…couldn't tell by this work, could ya?)
One of the highlights…lowlights? Low lifes? Of this trip was J. the Beer Bitch. For those of you who didn't know him, he was a young guy who somehow became Dave's Beer Bitch…he merely annoyed the rest of us! I don't think we saw him sober all week (not that we were!) He had a plan, you see, he was going to "break the place" by drinking them dry! Just ask him, he'd tell you…hell, he'd tell you even if you didn't ask him! I wonder how much of the trip he remembers…and how much he's making up for his buddies!!! Needless to say, we were very surprised to see him on our Air Jam flight home to Philly! And guess what? He annoyed the stewardesses nearly as much as he did all of us!!!
I'm sure there is a lot I'm forgetting to mention(maybe I'll post an update later!) But one thing I canNOT forget to do is to thank all of you for making this the best honeymoon ever! It was unconventional, that's for sure…who takes a honeymoon with 98 of their friends? But it was wonderful! We've walked away from this trip with many new friends, many happy memories, and a new love and respect for each other. We both acted totally out of character many times during the week and did a lot of stuff our friends would NEVER believe we'd do(well, MY friends would believe I'd do almost anything, but Chris' friends….well, that's another story!).
One of the biggest things this trip did, for me at least, was change my attitudes about a lot of things.
For one, I used to be uncomfortable with my body. Having spent a week naked with people of every possible shape, size, and color, who were comfortable with themselves and us, made me so totally at ease, so very relaxed about it, that I miss being naked all day!! Someone(and I'm sure it was someone in this group) once told me that there's nothing to hide with a naked person. I laughed when I first heard that, but now I understand it. I've never been with a friendlier group of people...and we're talking NEARLY 100 folks here! Everybody was just so easygoing(especially the Baron!! My days in the pool were not complete until I saw the Baron laying back and nodding his head in time to the music!)
The second thing it changed was my pace…I was really pushing things before Hedo. I didn't NEED to relax…the adrenaline got me where I had to go…I had to pack as much into my week as humanly possible….not any more. I spent a week where I HAD to do absolutely nothing! The first week EVER where Chris and I could laze in bed and just hold each other, without a child or dog interrupting us, where we could do WHAT we wanted, WHEN we wanted, and nobody would tell us it was wrong. I have never been so relaxed in my life!
Diane's trip report talks about the "attitude" of Hedo…I have it now…and I'm loving it! We have vowed to do everything possible to go back next year…and every year there after. To see our friends, to celebrate our anniversary(with the 98 folks who were there the first time around!), to have fun, to be naked, and to save our sanity.
So, in closing(if you've read this far, you truly are my friend!) thanks again to all of our "Hedo Friends", we love you all and are so grateful that we got to share this with you!
Maximum Respect….and remember…WWW Summer 2000 soon come!
IRIE!