John & Lois - August, 2010
Just like in your own lives, life has gone on year after year with all its milestones and challenges yet somehow we find the time, resources, and motivation to return to Fantasy Island. Amazingly, our most recent trip cost the same as ten years ago for similar class rooms. The economy continues to weigh heavily on the resort as well as in our bank account. I agree with most recent visitors that Hedo has been “tight” with its resources and that, unfortunately, the material things they offer will not exceed your expectations in any way. For example, this was the first trip when Friday night didn’t offer a wonderful buffet complete with lobster, ice sculptures, and martini bar. The Italian restaurant, Martino’s (formerly Pastafari’s) was closed Tuesday night with no explanation. Repairs on the main pool adjoining the disco kept both closed several days. It wasn’t because the resort was empty either because the front desk said we had 70% occupancy. The immaterial, good qualities of Hedo DO continue in that people are still warm, inviting, and love a party. Even as my wife and I begin our unwelcome migration into the “older” crowd, everyone still appreciates a smile.
The trip to the resort included people going to Breezes (the old Grand Lido) and was quick and uneventful. [The return trip had us to our gate the fastest ever at two hours even.] The midway stop was a nicer place. We had a first stay in a prude garden building that had no warm water the first night and just warm water the rest of the week. We brought a pool thermometer with us and the “warm” water was about 96 or 97degrees. The shallow ocean water hovered in the upper 80s. While on the subject of temperatures, the hot tub was a tepid 92 degrees the first two afternoons, 96, 97, 100, and then back to 92-94 or so each day thereafter. Most people would find upper 90s hot or OK but have to get out or sit on the ledge after 30 minutes or so with “official hottub” 100+ temperatures. The bar pool was 86 most days but somehow felt cooler once the sun went down.
The people attending the week we were there were in a bit of a unique situation because Hedo III didn’t close the 23rd as announced but on or about the 15th, the day we arrived. We talked with a few about the notice they got and most didn’t know until a week or two ahead of time. One couple found out two days ahead of time and was made to wait at the Hedo II main desk over two hours because no record of their reservation could be found. This tells me that the two resorts were literally not talking to each other during the transition. Amazing! Despite the troubles, the new visitors seemed to like their visit and the larger beach and hot tub. The added mix of ages, non nudists, and single people seemed to help round out the resort. There was a group from III that had to move their party and we hope they keep coming back. As usual, some single guys never got the behavior “memo” about the resort. Two young guys came into the nude pool with their suits on and just stood in the water near the stairway wall without taking anything off. After a few minutes of that, I mentioned to them that we’re all nude and they need to get with the program. They said they needed more time. OK. Five minutes later and after they had a drink, I said again that we’re all nude and if they want to warm up to things, there’s plenty of quiet beach area. Dumb and Dumber still couldn’t figure it out. A few of us thought about taking their suits off or having a bunch of women do it but nixed the idea since, after all, this is Hedo and everyone just wants to have fun. [Also, if word got out that groups of beautiful, naked women would pull your bathing suit off, every guy might show up that way!] But security was notified and they were taking off their suits when security was walking up. There was a similar problem at the hot tub one evening except that some guys stood just outside the bench area and watched everyone. I notified security and I guess being a vulture is allowed because two different guards did nothing. The guys didn’t speak English so I was left with just pointing at their bathing suits as I passed them while leaving.
We love the tropical climate (despite the afternoon showers), being naked all day, the silly games, and dancing every night while dressed up or in costume. This is the first year that no one wore a truly fetish outfit for fetish night. We could have easily won with a tame outfit consisting of a whip, handcuffs, choker, and black boots. During a previous visit during the pajama night party, one naturally tall woman wore five inch heels and rounded up four guys to be her “slaves” for the evening complete with rope chain and various “activities” they had to submit to. It was all done in fun and would you believe the woman was actually one of the nicest, soft spoken women you would ever meet?
A first for us this visit was a couple giving Tantric sex classes. We give them two thumbs up! Schedule a visit when they are there and you won’t regret it. For about an hour and a half every afternoon at 3:33 (think rain shower time), they taught a class in the exercise room. Those topics included the G spot, “snake charming”, women squirting, sexual positions, sexual dance, and more. It was refreshing to see couples truly trying to learn new things to please their partners and to enhance their sexual awareness. The whole class was totally “Hedo” and will add to our lives long after this trip.
Many people don’t realize that there are actually three good size beaches at Hedo. A pier runs out from the center of the resort and has boats docked to it at various times. To the right of it is the nude beach. The nude pool and bar are far from the dock and most people increasingly congregate to that end. To the left of the pier is the “prude” beach that some people use. Further out and nearest the Sandals side is another beach that’s very nice and quiet and a good place to be alone for a few hours.
We’ve added some pictures but it’s difficult to imagine the energy present from photos missing groups of naked people. We have many pictures taken over the years of ourselves with others that will never see the light of day because we respect people’s privacy. There are a few showing old currency, a window “sign”, and the booze we earned in the Golden age of liquor rewards. Even when taking a group picture at Martino’s restaurant, we asked permission, and one couple preferred not to be in the picture. You can take pictures at Hedo but it’s getting to be more and more a challenge. There was no one on the Breezes beach next to Hedo’s nude beach but the guard still came up to us as I shot toward the ocean. Another couple was chased out of the nude beach area near the pier end. Even while in the back of the dinner area, a manager for the visiting “GotAss.com” girls warned me not to take any of their photos as I was talking with them with my camera around my neck. Despite the challenges, we made it a point to get some of ourselves (married 31 years and not getting any younger) and volunteered to take pics of others with their cameras. The Tantric class teachers went on an erotic photo tour after one class and showed everyone how it’s possible with simple poses, understanding your camera, and a little imagination to get very sexy and tasteful images. We’ve included a few of our attempts taken that day. There are many private places behind the buildings that you can go to without worrying about people watching you.
So how do we sum up those seven visits over ten years and what might be useful for others? Well, if you haven’t gone, go. I’ll bet you $100 you return within two years. It will energize your marriage in different ways than resorts in the states could do. It has ours. While other people are fun, bring your own good time with you whatever that might be, and contribute to activities. Like at any good party, you’ll miss out on a lot of fun if you sit in the back room the whole time. Note to one multi-year return visitor we saw again: It’s time to finally let your feet go naked and ditch the socks! We talk about Hedo all throughout the year and people always want to hear more about it. It’s as if alumni are a special kind of people. But we’re getting tired of the lack of quality at the resort and in our opinion, it starts at the top with the management. They should visit the states for a week to see what is possible. We’re hopeful that with Hedo III closing, some of that resort’s talent goes to II and perhaps even some budget dollars. We’re sorry to see Hedo III close because we renewed our vows there five years ago and have that personal, emotional attachment. With change comes opportunity for improvement. If Hedo II thinks we’re all rich Americans and will come back no matter what, they are badly mistaken. Hopefully, they have a one year, five year, and ten year plan to keep what works, improve what doesn’t, and add new things we haven’t even thought about. We are likely to save up to visit another resort, perhaps when a group or others we know are there, to balance out our experiences. We didn’t go to Hedo last year because, in case no one has noticed, the bad economy required many of us to make tough choices and continues to do so. We’re hopeful that people that care about Hedo will continue to make it a great place to go because the bottom line is that whether the resort serves filet mignon every night or jerk chicken and fries three meals a day, you’ll return if the fun, sexually charged, party atmosphere is present and the accommodations and food are competitive.