Trip report June 17-25, 2005
For months I had planned to be at Hedo from June 17th through the 25th to correspond with the annual visit by the Beach Rangers, but absolutely crazy airfares prevented me from booking until June 1st. I know that the airlines are having problems and the price of fuel is keeping airfares up, but I simply could not justify spending 3X the airfare that we usually pay. So I monitored Travelocity and when the fares dropped I moved quickly. One quick call to Denny and I had airline and hotel reservations. Surprisingly the day I called, SuperClubs was having a special rate - the garden view prude rates were cheaper than the run of the house rates. I rarely care where we stay since we spend so little time in the room anyhow.Book-em Denny!
Travel
We have gotten spoiled with Air Jamaicas direct non-stop flights between Logan and Sangster. With a morning flight I am usually on the beach by 1pm. No such luck this time. Our advertised, scheduled non-stop flight stopped at Philly to pick up passengers. This didnt upset me so much on the way down as I understand that AJ is trying to save money and consolidating flights seems a logical way to do it. I didnt mind the thought of getting to Hedo an hour or two later than usual. The return flight was another story.
Since AJ has stopped doing the resort check in you now have to wait in line at the airport. When we arrived at the airport it was a madhouse. There were multiple lines for the multiple destinations and not enough people on the floor giving instructions. After finally figuring out which line I was supposed to be in my first question was, Are they combining the Boston and Philly flights? and the answer was, No, sir. We are not doing that today. Yeah right! At least the line moved at a decent pace.
So, to make a long story short in addition to the departure being delayed more than an hour we DID stop in Philly on the way home and since that was the first point of entry on return everyone had to get off, claim our luggage, go through Immigration, recheck our luggage and then sit and wait to reboard the plane. I will not fly Air Jamaica again until they get their s*** together.
The bus ride to the resort was fun. Everyone on the bus was going to Hedo, so there was a quick pit stop at the Global Villa Resort, then on to Hedo. I saw all of the other people who were on the bus during the course of the week and spent quite a bit of time with several of them. We had some very serious rains on the return bus ride to the airport, but the driver just drove right through the flooded roads.
The Resort
I had not been back to the resort since I was there the week that Hurricane Ivan hit and was amazed at the recovery. There are few areas where you really notice any difference and if you didnt know better you would be none the wiser. The vegetation is noticeably thinner behind the nude hot tub area and back by the squash courts. Everything else looks great.
A series of units have had private hot tubs installed. I believe that there are eight ocean view au natural, two garden view au natural, and two ocean view prude rooms equipped with private hot tubs. All were filled and operational when I left, but only the GVAN units were being made available. By now I expect them all to be available. We joked about the walls that were installed between the OVAN rooms that had hot tubs because the walls that separate the patio areas have doors installed. The doors seem kind of silly since you can walk a few feet and go around the walls, but there is some speculation that the Hedo might put shrubs in front of the hot tubs for privacy. If they do, I hope that they do it in such a way as not to block the ocean views.
Hedo has also installed a concrete walkway from the area directly below the disco to the patio area at the prude grill/Scotch Bonnet area. The walkway continues to the restrooms behind the dive shack. Presumably this walkway will facilitate women in heels going to dinner at the Scotch Bonnet and in the transportation of food to the Scotch Bonnet.
As always the grounds were in great shape. The beach was completely raked every morning. As a result of Hurricane Ivan, Point Village now has a larger beach area behind the Hedo Point. That area has completely filled in with sand and they have left it as a new, larger beach. The Jolly Mermaid, the ship that washed up on the Point Village property during Ivan is still stuck on shore and is somewhat of a curiosity and eyesore, but you have to look for it from the Hedo beach or point to see it.
The resort was only about 2/3 full, if that. At least a dozen rooms on each side were not available because of construction. Some of the construction was due to the installation of hot tubs. I have no idea what the others were closed off for.
Towels were never a problem. There were three in the closet when I arrived and I tried to reuse the ones I had, as long as they were clean and dry.
People had brought down two very cool beach toys. The first was a large donut shaped ring that could easily seat eight and the second was a smaller island-looking float complete with palm tree.
The hot tub temperature was out of control almost the entire week. I had heard that the hot tub, the cool pool and sprinkling pool were drained and refilled right before I got there. The hot tub had yet to recover the nine days that I was there. It would occasionally be OK during the day, but from dusk till I went to bed the water temperature was too hot to stay in for more than a few seconds. I heard someone speculate that the hot tub heater had two settings: On and Off.
Complicating matters, the biting insects were brutal. As soon as the sun started going down the biting insects were almost unbearable. I have gotten bitten at the resort before, but usually you get bit and the welts go away quickly. Whatever was biting this time left welts that stayed for days! The rooms were sprayed while I was there, so there was no problem in the rooms like we had last year.
The Weather
We had two days when it rained hard enough to chase us off of the beach or out of the pool. Both times the thunderstorms came in late in the afternoon and by the time it cleared up there was little time to re-gather at the pool or hot tub before dinner. We also had one day when it was very overcast, so we used it as an excuse to go into Negril.
I overheard some people say that it was hotter and more humid than previous June trips, but I did not feel the same. In fact several nights the heat and humidity broke and the evenings were quite comfortable. It was cool enough that I was able to wear lightweight, knit, long pants to dinner four times.
The Staff
It was good to see Agustus. As soon as he saw me he shouted, Wheres the lady?
I was somewhat disappointed to hear of the recent departure of two of my favorite dive instructors, Myron and Ritchie. However, I was fortunate to catch up with Myron during the week and he appears happy in his new position.
The entertainment coordinators were more low-keyed than other trips. They did gather people for nude water-slide invasions, but most of the rest of my time there they were apathetic.
The Food
Breakfast is almost my favorite meal at Hedo. I so love having a nice breakfast and not having to clean up afterwards. Bacon, sausage, fried eggs, grits, pineapple juice, awesome fresh fruitYUM! I dragged my butt off of the beach most afternoons for lunch and had a salad in the buffet area. I use lunch as an excuse to get out of the sun for a bit and avoid the food at Roberts. It is not that I dont like Roberts food just the opposite, but I need to avoid the burgers, grilled cheese and fries if I want to have jerk chicken. Most dinners were spent in the company of the Beach Rangers. We usually had two full tables. Dinner at Pastafari was memorable and the air conditioning was nice. I passed on invites to Munasan and the Scotch Bonnet. I also passed on most of the after dinner entertainment in favor of a power nap.
The Friday night buffets were superb even without lobster, which was not in season. I think I ate a full plate of sushi each Friday night.
There is a new ice cream machine so the ice cream is always the perfect consistency rather than the terrible slushy ice milk of the past.
Lettuce and bananas were absent for several days early in the week.
The People
Hedo IS a special place, but I am starting to think more and more that the people are what make the trip and leave the biggest impression. There were a lot of people there that week talking about Desire Resort in Mexico. Many I talked to have already been to Desire and many more are planning on visiting now that SuperClubs has eliminated the Pay for 14 nights in a calendar year and get 3 free deal.
I think if you have a good group of Hedo-minded individuals you can have a good time anywhere. You shouldnt rely on others to entertain you. This was evidenced in the piano bar and disco. Sometimes, on some nights, both were crowded and jumping. Other nights they were dead even during the prime hours of 10pm-1am. Get in with your own group of people and make your own good time.
Despite the low attendance the sexual atmosphere was pretty high. Early in the week there was a lot of activity on the beach or floats, but later in the week there was a group of 6-8 people who instigated most afternoons and whatever it was that was in the air or water or drinks quickly spread to other couples. One afternoon I found myself casually talking at the pool bar only to turn around to have a front row seat to some interesting strap-on action. The grotto was somewhat underused, but there was plenty of activity on the side of the pool to make up for it.
The crowd, at least on the nude side, was almost exclusively couples. In the nine days I spent on the nude side I saw only two single females and a small handful (pun intended) of single males. Everyone was social and well-behaved.
If the Sex Police were around they never stopped anything.
Diving
I did eight dives on seven non-travel days. Because of the departure of Myron and Ritchie and because ONeil was grounded (reasons unknown), Derrick and Anthony were pulling double duty. Also both engines on the main dive boat were out of commission. As a result all dives were done from the old (slower) dive boat. Still, all of the dives were fun. We saw a shark, a dolphin and several big rays. The water temps were in the mid-80s and visibility was excellent. I used a bathing suit bottom and a synthetic tank top for protection and that was more than sufficient. I also carry a pair of gloves. The gloves came in very handy at the end of the week as there were extreme currents that required ascent or descent on an anchor line and those anchor lines can grow some nasty and abrasive stuff. One day the currents were so strong that we had to come up after less than ten minutes as we had gotten pushed away from the reef into an open flat area.
Other Activities
The Repeaters Party was held in the Piano Bar. During the previous week, friends who were on their 10th trip won the free nights, so I thought I might have a chance with 13 trips under my belt. When it came time to give away the free nights there were three of us who still had our hands up at 13 visits: myself and one other person who had 13 trips each and some woman (who interestingly no one seemed to recognize) who claimed to have 29 trips. I think we got shafted.
The Friday night steel band and circus show was entertaining both Friday nights that I was there, but the post-dinner beach festivities lasted till after midnight both nights and many folks had exceeded their attention span before then.
We usually try to do something big for the toga and PJ parties, but I did not feel motivated this trip. I simply used the bedsheet for a toga. I kind of lost interest during the talent show and didnt stick around for the real toga party. I wore my South Park Fingerbang PJ bottoms to the PJ party hoping someone would catch the pun, but if they did no one said anything.
The disco and piano bar were pretty much hit or miss. Sometimes the piano bar was happening for sing-along or karaoke, just as sometimes the disco was crowded. The piano player seemed capable. See my comments under The People.
Volleyball was fun and a few afternoons it was quite competitive. There was only one volleyball for the two courts. One day a few people tried to get a game going on the nude side while another game was going on at the prude side. They were going to use a soccer ball since the one good volleyball was in use, but I didnt feel like sacrificing my fingers.
Hedo has considerably cleaned up the scheduled activities. No more cookies and ice cream, chocolate, or caramel licking during the wet T-shirt contest and no organized body shots. There was greater variety in the music played poolside and I think I only heard the Pussy song once, and didnt hear Short-dicked men at all.
Getting off (the resort that is)
We have tried to make it a point to get off the resort once each trip, so this year when I heard that someone was organizing a shopping trip to Times Square I jumped at the chance. One overcast day, eight of us hired a taxi to take us to Cosmos for lunch and then to Times Square. All eight of us threw in $10 each for the taxi, which in retrospect seems awfully expensive especially in light of the fact that the driver would have made the same trip for $20 if only two people were going rather than $80 for eight of us, but he did a decent job. Cosmos was nice with pavilion style dining on the beach. Lunch for two, with tip included was $17US. I rounded it up to an even $20 and left it at that. On the way to Times Square the driver made an unannounced stop at a store that looked sketchy at best he must have gotten a kickback from the owner for people that he brought in. We refused to even get out of the van and insisted that he proceed on to Times Square. I didnt pick up anything, but others in the group picked up some very nice jewelry and other souvenirs.
It was still pretty cloudy when we got back, so we decided to go across the street to check out Grand Lido. Vicki and I had been to Grand Lido last June so I offered to serve as tour guide. We got there about 20 minutes after an organized tour had left, but I politely explained that we had stayed there last year and that I was bringing some Hedo people over for a quick tour and the Lido security people were surprisingly accommodating. We walked around the main entry way, the lobby and art gallery, and then hit the Lido gift shop. All were impressed.
Things I love/like about this trip
The Beach rangers I miss you all terribly.
We had a ceremonial burning of a cowboy hat to remember a Hedo friend who passed away this year. Big guy you still stand tall and live on in our thoughts.
I had the pleasure of meeting the infamous Jamaica Jim and his wife.
Plenty of hot water in the showers anytime.
No underwear for 9 whole days!
I can have a nude woman (who I had not previously known just five days ago) sitting on my lap and there is nothing sexual about it.
Hedo people really get into their toys adult toys, pool toys, beach toys you name it!
Things I could have done without this trip
Air Jamaica I admit that I had gotten spoiled by their convenient and timely direct flights. I really hope that they can get it together again.
Neither of safes in my closet worked. One had a plug in the key slot and the other didnt even have a door.
The overheated hot tub too hot to sit in for more than a few seconds.
The biting insects were brutal. That, coupled with the excessive temps in the hot tub gave few options for refuge from the man-eaters once the sun began to set.
The entertainment coordinators were particularly apathetic this trip.
Three nights of the art auction.
Robert seemed to be grumpy most of the week. When it rained he refused to work at all because water was coming in through his roof. I sure hope that Hedo takes care of him and the roof problem. Besides the obvious problem of things dripping in the food, fryer and grill, I would hate to see him disgruntled or driven away like Dave the former piano player was.
Overheard at Hedo
We have become the people our parents warned us about.
One night while we were tossing a ball around the hot tub - We are acting like the people that we criticized on other nights.
We saw you all having sex around the hot tub last night. Now which group were you in?
I love tiny titties. I am a chest nut.
I never smoke at home, but when I am at Hedo I want to smoke. What is it about Hedo that makes people want to do things that they would never do at home.
Cool T-shirts seen at Hedo
Now I can die happy A reference to the Boston Red Sox winning the 2004 World Series, finding a second meaning at Hedo.
MILF
Revelations
I did most of my sleeping between 9 and 11pm each night, because you sure dont get much sleep at night there.
Things I am glad that I took
A package of 100 glow sticks. I passed them around the disco, and hot tub. One night we fashioned them into a ball and passed it around like a volleyball.
A coconut drinking mug it was an excellent conversation starter. I will bring down a bunch of them next trip.
