TRIP REPORT- JOHN & JANET 2/12-22/02
I guess we have been very lucky, as far as our past flights are concerned. As with all past flights, Air Jamaica, out of Baltimore, was flawless. Considering the heightened security, as a result of 9-11, check-in was a breeze and the flight left on time.
Arrived at MoBay, on time and after immigration and customs, hooked up with Bob and Wendy and Linda and Randy. We had exchanged e-mails, prior to the trip, and Tim Air was waiting for all of us. After a 2 minute kamikaze van ride, from the terminal to Tim Air, we were on our way home.
Hit a slight snag at check in. We had booked GVN H block and we were told there were none available today, to check back tomorrow. Put us in 2107 which overlooked the local artisans, on the textile (have seen objections to prude on the message board) beach. OK, but not what we had wanted. In any event, we shed our cloths and headed for the beach for our 12th trip to paradise. Bunches of familiar faces all extending warm welcomes and cold drinks. Tomorrow (Wed) came and no room; check back tomorrow. Missus getting uptight about not being able to unpack and set up housekeeping, but we managed. The second tomorrow (Thurs.) came and we had our room; 2145 and perfect. Exactly what we wanted. Check in staff were great and I know they did their very best, and I let them know how much their efforts were appreciated.
Took a quick tour of the new and improved H II and the following noted. Everything appeared to be either completed or in the final touch up mode of completion. The gym and spa area are beautiful. Appears to be a full service spa
and one of the more complete gyms Ive seen although I dont use such manual labor requiring facilities. Waterslide in operation and did not appear to be that popular. More on that later. The bridge between the textile pool area and the beach is a nice idea. Allowed an overview of most of the changes and a birds eye view of the goings on in the disco. I did not see the artificial turf covered pool tables used, for pool, the entire time I was there. Miniature golf course, behind the piano bar, looked finished, but was covered with leaves and appeared unused. Ice rink was covered with leaves and looked as if it had never been used, although I did see one of the entertainment coordinators carrying about a dozen, new, ice hockey sticks one afternoon during lunch. Swim up bar, submerged pool table, etc. looked like fun but seldom occupied by more than a few people.
The old prude beach bar has been converted into what I called hammock central. Numerous rope hammocks strung around it. Dining room roof still leaks, badly.
As far as occupancy is concerned. H II did not appear to be at maxed out capacity, for this time of the year. I base this on the number of occupied tables, at dinner, each night. At any given time, maybe 50 on the textile beach and the nude beach packed, as usual. My, my, all that lovely skin. Did not appear to be any major problem with the mix of textiles and nudes, on the nude side. I know that a few textiles became liberated and converted while we were there.
Nude beach was in good shape and, as stated, packed, as was the pool, Jacuzzi and the misting pool. Hot tub filled when the infrequent rains hit. Delroy, Scumba, Anna and a new girl, Nerica, were hot. Robert was on top of his game. Name a better supper than one of his cheeseburgers, fries and a cold Red Stripe, topped off with jerk chicken for dessert. Just doesnt get much better than that. Augustus seemed to always be there and constantly on the move. Hardest working man in the place.
We meet up with the same folks, each year and have a great time. Last year, someone brought a rubber chicken, the kind that squawks when you squeeze it, that became a focal point of our beach area. This year we had 10. All were hanging from the tree and all were squeezed by anyone who passed by and had the desire to do so. So easily entertained, we were. The chickens even participated in the wedding of two members of our little loosely organized group. It took place on the hill between the back of H block and the squash court. It was a formal wedding with dresses and tuxedos and was quite nice. We even had naked people in the bushes watching. As an officer in the Royal Canadian Air Force, he would have qualified for an arch of crossed sabers, at the end of the ceremony. Since we did not have sabers, and he was retired, an arch of crossed chickens was provided.
On or about the 16th, the Bubbly Bares rolled in and the party was on. Some of the members were a rock and roll band called the Fat Cats and were from the Chicago area. They set up operations, on the beach, twice, while we were there and they had the beach rocking. The second time was for the Bares champagne party. Management joined in, on this one, and she really enjoyed herself. Their Mardi Gras parade spilled over into Grand Lido. The typical show us your tits chant went up and, of course, almost everybody in the dining room complied. A few guys even dropped trou.
All were rewarded with beads and the usual throw always. One of the more touching moments occurred when, as we were marching past a row of rooms, a little old lady, with a walker, shuffled out the back door, of her room, and watched the parade. A group of men broke off, ran across the lawn to her, put a bunch of beads around her neck, handed her a bunch of chocolates and rejoined the group. This lady had the biggest grin one could imagine as she watched until we were out of sight.
At one point, Bob from the hedo on-liners, and I, conducted the first ever, official, Slick Assed Sliders water slide competition. As we were walking toward the water slide announcing the competition we only had two people expressing any type of interest. We thought this was going to be a real bomb. As we were conducting time trials, more and more people showed up until we had approx. 50 signed up. The competition originally consisted of 2 groups; textiled and nekid. When the very few textiled competitors learned that swim suits slowed you down, they joined the nekid crew and the competition was a huge success. Best time was in the 7.8 second area. Style points were awarded to the men for maximum water displacement in the splash pool and to the ladies for the most convincing orgasmic scream while in the chute. H II admin showed up, to check the safety side of the competition and after about 10 mins. of observation, walked away with a smile on their faces and shaking their heads.
I know that we did a lot more but it all sorta ran together as a result of a gin-induced haze.
OK. Now to the evaluation of H-II, from our viewpoint.
Food. Plentiful, varied and quite good. Pastafari was excellent. Scotch Bonnet was very good, although the night we went, it had rained and it was set up next to the Japanese restaurant. Japanese restaurant was great, considering the lack of experienced Japanese chefs. The Jamaican chefs did a wonderful job and, the restaurant itself, will only improve as the chefs gain experience.
Towels. Plentiful in the morning and afternoon, at all three locations, but were snapped up quickly. Towel quality seems to be on the decline. I noticed that all towels were hand labeled H-II, in a corner, and many were getting thread bare. I guess they did not want to burden the GL folks with anything less than luxurious towels.
Accommodations. Same ole, same ole. Clean, comfortable with an A/C that worked above and beyond. I am glad that my age has not slowed my Hedo shower quick step, though. Lotsa pressure but lotsa surprises in the temperature department.
Entertainment. With the exception of Georgia Henry, same ole, same ole. She consistently brings the house down. Valentines night was a disaster. Toga night had been switched to Wed. because Valentines fell on Thursday, so all felt something akin to previous lovers nights would be forthcoming. NOT. The entire evenings festivities were the lamest spin off of the Newlywed game ever experienced. By the time it was over (some 90 mins. later) most of the dining room had cleared. Past Valentines nights found the coordinators presenting the ladies with a red rose, a kiss on the cheek and a Happy Valentines Day wish at the beginning of the evening. This year, after the Newlywed game had pretty much cleared the dining room, coordinators came around and presented the few remaining ladies with a red carnation and a here. Come on H-II. I know you could have done better.
Coordinators. Did a good job considering there were only a few on hand.
Piano Bar. Veronica was missed and there was too much Dave and not enough sing along. Cigarette smoke seemed to be less than in the past.
All in all, the pluss and the minuss evened out. Spent a wonderful 10 days and already looking forward to next year.