Trip Report 11/17 11/27 2001
We arrived at the airport 3 hours early, and it took 2 of those hours JUST TO CHECK IN for our flight to MoBay through Atlanta. This was thanks to some loser who thought vaulting through a security checkpoint and then hiding out would classify him as the football fan of the year the day before. Luckily, once we got to Atlanta, everything was smooth. Security was tight, and I was glad to let them do their jobs.
We hit Mobay just as the sun was setting, so we were just too late to take TimAir. Only us and a couple of Lido-ites on the bus ride from hell. We got a flat tire on the way, but the driver actually had a spare. Surprised as we were, we rolled into the driveway of our home sweet home about 8 PM. We were led to our room on the Nude side, construction view (we had Run Of House, so we got stuck right next to the construction of the new gym). During the walk to the room, the power went out Hedo-wide. It came back in a few minutes. We got to the room, unpacked, unwinterized, and we were heading for the dining room at 8:30.
It almost seems like we never left a year ago. Walking up the path, hey, first two people we see are friends from last year, Terry and Milt. They are leaving the next day, so we are glad to get a quick hello in to them, and Milts wife Dee drops by the table for a quick hello. We did miss seeing TLCA. Got the impression from them that the old clich the worst day at Hedo is better than the best day anywhere else was tested often. Construction was a pain, and the hot tub has been cold for two days. Noise I can deal with, but cold hot tub that just aint gonna do it. Ran into Rich at dinner as well. Since we didnt want to run out of steam early on our 10 day trip, we headed to the hot tub. Yep, it was cold, so we hit the hay kind of early, around 1130.
Now, for those of you who were not there in Nov, you are probably thinking ok, so the hot tub wasnt boiling hot, or maybe it wasnt steamy, Or some of you might be thinking, it wasnt hot from action. NO Sorry, but this is not an exaggeration. The water was downright cold. The swimming pool water was the same temperature as the hot tub.
Memo to Hedo2: Forget the ice skating rink. Drunk naked people do not need to have ice to slip, fall, walk funny, or hurt ourselves. Just give us a GD hot tub with warm water. For the love of all that is hedonistic, not one of your guests would choose an ice skating rink over a warm hot tub at night. I promise, if you scrap the ice rink and use that money to fix the heater AND filter on the nude hot tub, you will not lose one repeat guest because of that decision. (BTW, we also heard from STAFF, the ice rink will be bring your own skates. I honestly cannot believe that this is true, because it is SOO STUPID I think it must be a joke, but there you have it, next to the condoms and toys from home, bring those ice skates. And be sure to check that bag, cuz those blades are weapons.)
Ok, so Sunday through Sunday we do all of the below:
Wake up if it is after 10 (we were awakened many times from 7AM on thanks to the construction, but we didnt get up till after 10); get dirty banana drink; head to nude pool; get more drinks; get lunch at grill when it opens; get more drinks; float around pool meeting new friends and old; as sun sets, move to hot (only 3 or 4 days of the whole 10) tub (the other days it was the bigger cool tub). Get jerk chicken, drink more, head to room; dress for dinner; eat; drink more; enjoy evening activities; wander around between Veronicas, the dining area, and the room; head to hot tub, check temp, get in anyways; finish off the drinks; head to bed, repeat.
Variations from this included: Snorkelling, hanging at the beach a couple of days instead of the pool, Spanksgiving parade (Sandals, get a clue, we will be there, we will go past your security, and people will know where we are from even without a banner, you dont like it, close that day), Jackie won 2nd place in the Wet Tshirt contest, body painting (sushi shack and a fine happy mutant turtle, thanks Alan and Cathy), and the PJ party, where Jackie got sexiest PJs for her red danglies. We went to complain about the canceling of jerk chicken, and after they promised it was on the way, we were met on the way back to the nude side by people who were madder than us. The six of us wanted our chicken, but closing the bar brought back a heck of a lot more of us nude protesters. Walked right through the dining room, sat in the lobby, and played volleyball in the prude pool (all nude) while we waited for them to bring us chicken and booze. Then, at about 8 PM, when most of us had Pastafari reservations, they finally opened up the nude bar and grill. So, to not waste the food and all that they went through, we went, ate the chicken and drank for a while, then went right to dinner. (Dressed by now).
Memo2 to Hedo: If you are going to cut anything, dont cut food or drink on the nude side. I promise you will be sorry. If attendance is low, think of the repeaters that bring you high attendance. We are nude, we want booze and food, and we put up with a lot of other crap to return every year! If you are gonna close down a section of the resort, close the prude side.
We also made tons of new friends, and hung out with a few of the gang from last year that were back. We worked on our international relations this year, meeting new friends from Italy, Germany, England, Mexico, Brazil, Ecuador, Puerto Rico, and Canada. Many fantasies came true, and Jackie even met a fantasy that she had to back down from (WINK).
Now, to name the guilty, warm hellos, seasons greetings, and a huge thank you (for making our trip THAT much MORE fun) to the following:
Bruce, Andrea, Alan, Steve, Jessica and Stephen (Minnesota), Joe, Diane, Stephen and Susi, Paul, Sam, Sean, Lulu, Rick, Cindy, Doc, Marti, Jim, Ruthanne, Baron and Mama, Cathy, Scott, Dan, Lori, Cheryl, Jeff, Val, Eric, Dennis, Sharon, CbusSara, Karen, Kkaren, Mary, Jim, Kelly, Angie, wow, I forgot a lot already, Joe, Gail, Darrell, Diane, Tim, Marie, Julio, Rich, John, Robin, Beth, Miguel, Mauricio, Laura, Volvo, Frances, Jason, Sarah, Neil, Craig, Cindy, Dean, Jim, Char, Drew and Nancy (mom), Alan, Becky, Gretchen, Gary, Todd, Michelle, Terry, Milt, Dee, Carol Ann (even if we missed you), Windsong, Heather, Sandy, Chris, Cookie and Bill (you were there in spirit), and any of the many that I forgot to mention.
Final Memo to Hedo: Please try to get a better understanding of your guests. We dont ask for much. We dont want fancy. We dont want death defying, we dont want ice rinks, rock walls, or gyms to rival Golds Gym in Venice Beach. Just give us a clean place to get together, with food, beverage, and good atmosphere (warm water in the hot tub, clean water everywhere, not too much noise, but not too much quiet), and we will keep coming back. I actually have a theory that the construction that is taking place is more for the benefit of employees, and their friends. The gym and the new disco will surely rival almost anything in Negril, and I can see this creating problems. Employees will get their friends in to the ice rink or the gym, and then service will wane, as these employees will be more interested in hanging out with their friends. It happens already at the gym that is there. My suggestion is this: To get on the page of your CUSTOMERS, appoint a council of customers. Maybe some of the long time repeaters (lots of trips), and some of the new repeaters (2-5 trips) could offer suggestions for the resort. Also, when an idea comes up to Hedo mgmt, run it by these counselors to see what guests will think. The council people could use the msg boards and emails to gather consensus opinions as well. Dont get me wrong, this group should not have total decision making power, but hey, think how much you could have saved if you had asked a dozen of your important repeat guests what they thought about an ice skating rink at Hedo.
Thanks again to all our friends and all the friends we have yet to meet Soon come. Respect to you all!