We just returned from our first trip to Hedo II on
September 3. We had a wonderful time over all and we do plan to return to the
resort in time.
Since this was our maiden voyage, we decided to create
this trip report to reflect our experiences and to aide other Hedo virgins
with regard to what they may expect while at the resort. This report is not
going to be a day-to-day diary of our visit, but rather it will be based on a
few key subjects. Our sole intent is to give others a straightforward account
of our Hedo II encounter.
One final note, Hedo has a culture all its own. This,
inevitably, creates language that is specific to the resort; terms such as
"Vinny", "Wally", and "DIF". When we read
through other visitor's reports we became very frustrated finding these terms
and not having any idea what they meant. Actually, to be frank, we thought it
was rude to use such terms and expect the casual reader to know their
meanings. (I still have no idea what DIF means.) So, if we use a Hedo term in
this report we will include our interpretation of it. If we fail to do this
please feel free to email us and we will clarify ourselves.
Helpful Tips
This is advice that we will follow the next time we
visit.
We arrived on a Monday and left the following Monday. It
would be better to arrive on a Friday and leave the following Friday or
Saturday. The reasoning for this is because during the week things are fairly
slow and activities really picked up on the weekend. At the beginning of our
vacation we were hyped and ready to go, but the resort was very quite. By the
time the weekend arrived and the resort was going full blast, we were pretty
tired from being up until 3:00 a.m. every night partying.
We will avoid being there over a holiday weekend on our
next trip. The Labor Day weekend occurred during the end of our trip. The
resort filled up fast with people who were only going to be there a couple of
days. Some, not all, wanted to pack in as much party as they could during
their short visit. One poor fellow, whom we all nick named "Sword
Boy", was drunk out of his mind. Security finally had to carry him away,
literally. His antics became so disruptive that the call went out for Security
to throw him in the pool as he was hauled away. Strangely enough, he decided
to throw himself into the pool, but at least it kept him off of the stage and
dance floor. We found other short-stay guests to be rude and pushy, especially
at the bars.
Pack light, really. We packed enough stuff for a week and
didn't use half of it. The things that you really will need are: sun tan
lotion/block, bug spray (Off), beach shoes, sarongs, toiletries, something to
wear to dinner or to the restaurants. Honestly, we could have packed every
thing we needed in one school back pack and still had room left over.
We must say that we spent the majority of our time on the
nude side. We only ventured onto the prude side to shop with the local
craftsmen. So when we speak about the beach or the pools we are referring to
the nude side.
The Resort
The grounds are outstanding! There is lush dense foliage
everywhere. There are picnic tables and hammocks hidden away all over the
property. There were plenty of beach chairs and mats/rafts on the beach,
however these were in short supply at the pools by the weeks end. This didn't
really bother us because when we were at the pools, we were in the water. When
we just wanted to lie around we liked the view of the ocean from the beach.
The resort is getting an upgrade. This means that there
is construction during the day. It's mostly centered around the prude pool and
main dining areas. Unfortunately, they have erected 8-foot high plywood
barricades around these areas. This really cuts off the view of the property
and of course the project is very noisy at times. We will definitely wait
until the construction is completed before we go back. Our room was far enough
away that none of this bothered us, but we did talk to a few people who were
right next to the construction. They wanted to sleep late but couldn't because
of the noise.
The Room
By any standard the rooms are very small. The rooms are
most lacking in the bathroom. There is practically now way to accommodate two
people at the vanity at the same time. We just about had to stand on the
commode to close the door, it really is that small. And of course, the showers
are legendary. One minute they will blast you with icy water the next you'll
be scalded. (We did find a solution to this problem, which we'll be happy to
share with those who are interested.) We could go on about would terrible the
dcor is but what would be the point?
Overall, the room was clean and fresh and well serviced
by the housekeeping staff. In the larger sense of the resort, you really are
only going to be doing two things in that room, sleeping and getting cleaned
up. However, as we would walk back and forth to our room we did hear the moans
of some people having sex in their room. And we did take advantage of the
mirrored ceiling so that we could say that we did it, at least once, in the
room.
The Food
We sampled just about everything there was to eat, except
the Scotch Bonnet. It was all very good. Keep in mind that the resort has to
cater to all sorts of people, so the food in the main dining is bland. There
are plenty of spices and condiments that you can add yourself to flavor the
food to your tastes. The food at the Pastafari restaurant was excellent. As is
the chow at Robert's grill on the nude beach, but it takes a bit to get used
to the unusual flavor of their beef.
Activities and Entertainment
We were told by a repeat guest, who had just come from
Hedo III, that the most experienced entertainment staff had been transferred
to H3 to try to liven things up there. We were also told that some of the
seasoned staffed had quit and gone to work at one of the other resorts in
Negril.
At any rate, the entertainment staff was very laid back.
They would cruise through the nude pool area and announce some activity and
then disappear. During the week that we were there, we saw only one nude
volley ball game and only one guy who did the body painting. We wish that the
entertainment staff had been a bit more enthusiastic and encouraging about
getting the planned activities going.
The nightly after-dinner performers were all very good.
Every night a different group or artist arrived to keep us all up beat while
we waited for the disco to open.
Of the two major theme nights, PJ and toga, PJ was by far
the most fun. Toga night was something of a let down after all the hype
surrounding it. PJ night, on the other hand, was a blast. It was sexy, erotic,
energetic and hedonistic at its best. Beware of the Vinnies at the disco.
(Oops we used a Hedo term so let us give you our definition. Vinny
Unaccompanied male under the age of 30. Thinks he's God's gift to womankind.
Does not believe that the rules of the resort apply to him. Female version
often called a Minnie or a Vinnette.) These guys are rude and pushy. If you
leave your lady alone to get drinks or take a piss expect to find her
surrounded by these guys when you return. They really love the disco, I do
know why. We never saw any single females in the disco during our stay. All
the women that we saw in the disco came with an escort. I wonder why? (A hint
to the single guys. The disco is not like a club in the States, where you can
expect to find single ladies to "pick up". The ladies at the resort
during the day are the same ladies that will be in the disco at night. They
don't import any new ones just for the disco. If there is a lady who attracts
your attention, start the ball rolling during the day, then make a
"date" to take her to the disco.)
The other highlight of our evenings was the 'slut-wear'.
Ana had a different slutty outfit every night. Many of the other guests seemed
to enjoy this activity too. Or they (prudes?) were completely shocked by it.
It was just about as much fun to watch them react as it was to get dressed up.
We'll have to go back again, if for no other reason than to get another use
out of those outfits, where else could anyone get away with wearing that
stuff? If any Hedo virgins have not seen pictures of the ladies in their
slut-wear, we suggest going to www.wickedtemptations.com
and buy as much as you can afford. You won't be disappointed!
Drugs
Drugs are readily available to tourists. We were
propositioned to buy ganja from the time we left immigration until we reached
the resort. Even while we were at the resort, several of the staff asked if we
needed any ganja. Also, as others have mentioned, there are several boatmen
who hang out at the beach to sell ganja or coke. There was at least one guest
who offered to sell us some Viagra. Ganja was smoked everywhere. The smell was
very prominent around the rooms and our room had the distinct aroma of
skunkweed when we arrived. There seemed to always be at least one or two
joints being passed around in the pool area. We never saw anyone attempt to
hide it. The only time that we saw any attempt to control ganja smoking was in
the disco. One fellow, who was celebrating his birthday, fired up a massive
joint and passed it around for a few minutes. Finally, one of the
entertainment staff told him he had to take it outside.
Finally SEX
Before we start this subject it seems important to note
that we are not swingers in the sense that we swap partners, we are
monogamous. We have absolutely nothing against the 'lifestyle' or the people
in it. We do however, like to watch and be watched to a certain extent.
Sex was everywhere! We have never seen nor had as much
sex in one week as we did at Hedo! Almost every morning we saw at least one
couple on a raft engaged in one sex act or another. At one point we were third
in line for our turn in the grotto. (Fortunately there are plenty of hidden
hammocks that others didn't know about, or didn't care to use.) Every night on
the beach there were at least three other couples copulating in the beach
chairs. Sex of every kind went on in the pool and pool area every afternoon.
One day there was an orgy that went on for almost three hours. We had one
young lady offer to join us in the grotto and another young man asked if he
could be of service, we politely declined both. The hot tub was a central
gathering place for couples that wanted to watch or be watched or join
together with another couple. We could go on and on about how much sex there
was at Hedo, and we would be happy to be more specific if any one asks. But
the point that we are trying is make is that Hedo is a sexually liberating
place. Whatever your fantasy is, it can be realized easily at Hedo. Likewise,
if you don't want to participate in such things, you won't be pressured to.
You can always go back to the room and make use of the mirrored ceiling.
While all this sex was very erotic and stimulating there
is another side that Hedo virgins should know about. The first is the water.
There is some much fornication in the pools that the water has to be treated
heavily every day. The chemicals used caused our eyes and noses to burn
somewhat; it also irritated our throats and nasal passages. The key here is to
limit your exposure to the water. We experienced no other ill effects. The
only other thing that we disliked about the public sex was the Wallies.
Wallies are single / unescorted males typically in their 50's who like to
watch. When we saw watch we mean they will get right up next to you and stare.
They will go from couple to couple and just stare while the couple tries to
make love. Our experience was that when one couple gets started it stimulates
others and before you know it there will be 6 to 12 couples having some form
of sex in the pool area. This can really keep the Wallies busy. We never found
a good way to get rid of them. We don't mind making love next to another
couple doing the same and if they glance over at us occasionally and it
excites them, or we glance their way, all the better. But to have someone sit
there a foot away and just stare, we found to be very unnerving. When this
happened to us, we would slow the action; the Wally would lose interest fairly
quickly and move on to heavier action. Then we would resume. I think some of
them caught on that we didn't want that kind of attention, some didn't. And of
course there were some couples and triples who actually did want that kind of
attention.
Well that's about it for our first experience at Hedo II.
We hope that this report will be of some assistance to Hedo virgins. This is
the sort of candid information that we looked for before we went on our trip
and never did find. Of course we realize that this was simply our experience.
We have tried to relate the events of our visit as honestly as we know how. We
are in no way trying to be overly critical or enthusiastic about the resort.
We know that many people are very passionate about Hedo and might take offense
at some of the things we had to say about it. We respect them, their points of
view, and everyone else who visits Hedo. No resort is perfect and despite its
short falls we will return to Hedo II but first we are going to try Hedo III
and give them a chance to complete the construction at H2. If anyone would
like to ask us anything about our trip we would be happy to help in any way
that we can.
Respect,
Don and Ana
