Steve (2-26-2000 to 3-4-2000)
Just got back a couple days ago. Had the time of my life, Yeah Mon, No problem!
I figured I had better write this soon before it escapes from my mind like a dream... a glorious dream.
With the help of Denny, you kind HedoVets, and of course the brilliant Chris Santilli. I felt like I had already been there. Which I hadn’t, I now realize I had no idea, I had only a few of the details and some descriptive stories but you really can’t truly understand it until you lived it.
I think the best description I heard of for Hedonism II is that it is a Summer Camp for Adults. Yeah Mon. I have fond memories of summer camp. Good people, sun, water…just add a bit of alcohol...stir in some Nekidness...place it in the surroundings, of what one can only imagine the garden of Eden must resemble..and then add the finishing touch…the people to host the party just happen to be warmest, kindest people you will ever know. Yeah mon no problem, here.
Actually I just have one problem I’m here...in Wisconsin...not there...yet...I will most definitely return.
Little background might be valuable. I’m in my late twenties, single, and of course male. I was joined by a friend who happens to be single but involved. We both knew going in that the male to female ratio was poor. Since he is in a committed relationship it wasn’t a problem for my friend. As for me, I wasn’t going on a vacation for the purpose of sex. I just wanted to get away, see Jamaica, get nekid in the sun, drink too much, sleep to late, and meet all these great people. (I will admit, if I had found a little romance it have added to the overall experience but it’s absence didn ’t detract much from my trip.)
If you don’t mind I’m going to skip the details of getting there. I think topic has been well covered in other’s trip reports. I will mention that we took Tim-Air and would highly recommend it. It’s worth the $55 to get there a little early not to mention a fun trip with a spectacular view. The couple we shared the plane with, Mary and Jim (Jack Nicholson’s long lost twin) were great, we saw that a lot over the next 7 days, always with a smile and a kind word, interesting perspective, colorful tale, or useful advice... the first of many great couples we were to encounter. We arrived at hedo at around 4:30 on Saturday. It took all of about 10 minutes to get the room key to our Oceanview-AuNatural room (lucky bastards.. eh ). We stopped at the main bar, grabbed a dirty banana (the first of many) and strolled down to our room...I loved the place already...the foliage there is simply stunning….brilliant colored flowers, majestic trees warmly covered by vines(that's vines not vinnies). Room was simple, two beds, air conditioner, nice view...a bottle of champagne...a mirror on the ceiling...not a bad place to lie your head at night.
After inspecting our room and putting away a few things we realized we needed another drink. We both knew the "place to be" was the nude side and only a matter of when...sooner or later we would arrive. So about 20 minutes after we arrived we dropped off the clothes, put on a towel and headed down to the beach to find a Red Stripe. Okay, it wasn’t as easy as I expected to drop the towel but out of fear of masses of people blowing whistles I let the towel drop and headed for the bar. Took a few minutes to adjust to the new found freedom, but after a couple Appleton Rum and Cokes and I swore of clothes forever. The warm sun was shining wear the sun don’t normally shine…and it was good.
Within ten minutes at the bar we had met about 3 or 4 people and were having a great time. Couple hours passed, we noticed a group of people gathering on jetty staring in the sky. Not being one to miss a chance to stare at the sky we headed down. It turned out to be the sun setting, another great Kodak moment...the way the oceans seems to go right to the edge of the earth... just swallowing up the sun...truly something to see.
Wondered back to around room, showered and head up to the Main Dining Room. Had a great meal, good show...can’t really recall which show it was but I do remember enjoying it. Then off to check out Veronica’s bar. Found Dave leading the crowd in a roaring rendition of “The Big Bamboo”. Great group having a great time. Stayed and enjoyed the show. When Veronica and Dave eventually closed up shop we headed down to the disco...reminded me a bit of college...had a couple drinks...music way too loud...left...wondered the beach enjoying the lights of Negril shimmering across the bay and view the stars spread thickly in the night sky.
The next morning we had a great breakfast and went on down to the dive shack and met Ritchie (Head Scuba Instructor). Signed up for certification dives, gathered our gear and headed off to the dive boat. Ritchie is a great guy and a thoughtful instructor. We had a great time diving. I have heard that Negril is not one of the great places to dive but I enjoyed it immensely. You could see the bottom of the ocean 90 feet away, the water is warmer than most pools I’ve swam in, amazingly colorful fish. It was great. Loved all of the dives I did. Unfortunately I drank a gallon of sea water that first day, which of course is not a good thing. Felt like hell for the next hour or so, had a burger over at Nude Grill, fries, and a couple dirty bananas. Felt much better. The rest of day was very similar to the day before. So was the next and the next and the next. Wake up...have a light breakfast...go diving...head over to the nude beach for the remainder of the daylight…shower….have dinner...drink a little too much...have a good time at one of the parties or Veronica’s...wonder the beach…find room. Sleep…repeat.
Of course their were a few variations… some days we did the 60 foot dives…some days we did the 90 foot dives. The 90 foot dives were blessed with a young couple from Belgium, Christopher and Isabella. Christopher was a great guy, but the real blessing was Isabella. A real charmer not too mention drop dead gorgeous (for those their she was also the one who was in the Circus show in the main dinning room). A few hours were spent sailing the cameraman's around the bay, or shopping in Negril or exploring the island...etc.
The PJ party and toga Party were a ball. I had read in Chris’s book, her plea for the men not to just wear boxers. So I wrote and asked her advice on what to wear. She gave me some great suggestions, one of which I took. To my delight my costumer turned out to be there that night. That’s right…Chris Santilli just happened to be there that week. Although you might not be able to tell this from her book but she is actually quite funny, just kidding Chris. What can I say about Chris, she’s great, attractive inside and out, she is a ball of energy and silliness. It’s hard to be around Chris without a grin on your face. A true class act.
This week also tuned out to be a week of Bubbly Bares. What a great group, what a great week it was turning out to be...The Bubbly Bares and Chris Santilli...how could fun not happen!? The Bubbly Bares were a great group of people. One couple in particular we saw a lot of was Bubbles and Burt. Diane (or Bubbles) could be found on the nude beach at four every day filling the sky with bubbles. “After all, what ’s paradise without bubbles” she was say. Yeah mon, I couldn’t agree more. They were also frequent dive companions, a truly great couple. We enjoyed their company very much. We are convinced that Burt is at a whole new level of relaxation, didn’t say a lot, didn’t need to….seemed very content.
If any Bubbly Bares ever read this I would like to say Thank you bringing down the Fat Cats from Chicago. It was great having a live band playing for the Nude beach, complemented with a healthy dose of Champagne and it made the perfect brunch. I heard rumors that the Bubbly Bares had taken an object or two from the Manager’s room and placed it on the stage. The next day the staff had moved all of the chairs and banners from the Bubbly Bare area to the Garden...very funny. Gotta love watching the kids play.
Quick overview of some of the details;
FOOD: We enjoyed the food immensely, the lobsters were fabulous, salads and hot dishes were excellent, lots of great fresh fruit, fresh bread, salad, great deserts (Double Chocolate Cake can’t be beat) omelets were very good, the selections of meats were tender, cooked perfectly. No the meals aren’t gourmet but they provide a diverse selection that should please most palates. They certainly satisfied mine. Heard Pastifari’s was very good but didn’t make it there myself. The burgers, fries and of course Jerk Chicken at 6p.m. served from the Nekid Grill were the Perfect snacks to get you through the day.
SERVICE: The staff is outstanding. One wonderful person after another. Maria the bartender, Toni the security card, Sanja the housekeeper, Veronica, Ralphie, Ricky, Delroy, Scumba, Pete, Kenrick, Ritchie, Antoni, all of the entertainment staff, they were all great. We never waited more than 5 minutes for a drink and that was only when they were very busy. I never heard the phrase “Soon Come”. I was more than ready to be patient for the service, but my patience was never put to the test. I never had an empty coffee mug, water glass, wine glass or orange glass while seated in the dining room. A dirty dish never spent 5 minutes at our table. Each of them seem to go out of their way to talk with us, to make sure that we were having a great time and having no problems. We had several meals with members of the staff and they were so friendly and open I just couldn’t believe anyone could possibly have any complaints with the staff. They are the heart of Hedo in my opinion. From our housekeeper putting flower pedals on our beds and transforming the bath towels into Swans lied carefully on the bed, to the diving staff swimming their asses off to catch a Sea Turtle and turn him in our direction so we didn’t miss seeing this amazing creature. The groundskeepers do an amazing job maintaining the place and always had a kind smile and friendly word. I can’t possibly say how much the staff added to our trip. They were just so warm and accepting. If you miss getting to know the staff it is truly your loss, they are so integral.
ENTERTAINMENT; I didn’t really participate in a lot of the events put on by the entertainment staff but I did eventually meet most of them. They were all great, can’t believe their energy. They work 16 hours a day on average (including training and rehearsals) six days a week. How they do it is beyond me. As for the nightly entertainment, I enjoyed the shows, some more than others but I thought they put on a pretty good show at dinner, and the couple lunchtime spins I saw were entertaining. I really enjoyed Dave or at Veronica’s. He had a real talent at getting the people involved. Great times.
VINNIES: I was a little put of by the frequent use of the term Vinnies to describe single men in general from the Trip Reports I had read before I left. After having seen some first hand I have much more sympathy for the couples out there. I went to the hot tub one night, single men outnumbered the couples quite a bit. Some of the couples looked uncomfortable, so I decided to leave after about a half hour. A lot of the guys were just sitting there... watching...waiting...for something to happen. It was quite pathetic in my opinion and I didn’t want to be part of it. If any single guys read this, don’t go their to watch the couples, that is just such a sad commentary on your character or rather lack thereof. Try and show a little integrity and dignity. If you go with a friend to relax in the warm water that is one thing but don’t go there to stare. You will have more luck with the couples who swing by meeting them during the day. Trust me, their were a few couples who generously invited me to join in their reindeer games. I respectively declined but was very flattered. But I doubt I would have been invited at all had they seen me in the Hot Tub staring at them the night before. Just a tip.
Complaints: Boy it’s hard to think of anything to complain about. No problems...really. Marijuana could have been a lot easier to find, I mean why doesn’t the staff ever ask if you need a little smoke...he he. Really no complaints...okay just maybe they could market less to single men and more to single woman but really it’s my responsibility to bring female companionship not Hedo. That’s it, no problems.
Would I go back, you know I will. Next time I will bring a female companion, but I had a great time as a single man and would do it again, but I think I would enjoy it even more with a woman to share it with.
One last note...from time to time I would hear something stupid like, the ones not wearing suits are the ones who really should. Nothing could be further from the truth. The older women, the larger women, the woman with the mastectomy, the ones with strech marks, your all gorgous...your bodies look great and most of you had a spirit about you that was just so attractive. The young petite girls have nothing on you. (Although young pretty girls, you also contributed a great deal) Don't change one bit.
I could go on and on about this trip and the wonderful people I met but this already a lot longer than I had intended on being. There are a few dozen people I would like to mention but it would take to long. I have to say that Charlie and Al were great guys, very entertaining. Howard and Valerie, thanks for the time we shared, Mandy and Toni, great hanging with you guys...Chris and Diane...what I can say...you’re the best..I’d say don’t grow up but I don’t think there is any reason to worry about that. Love you guys. To the many others who added to our trip, Thank you and hope to see you next year. Thanks again to all of the Bubbly Bares, you guys are a riot.
Thank you Denny for providing this forum and bringing together all these people. I hope we meet someday. Thanks to the hedo vets and Chris for preparing me for my trip.
Maximum Respect... Steve