After an absence of 4 years, Ann & I returned home to Hedonism II in Negril, Jamaica for their first Nude Week celebration held May 3-10, 1997. This report summarizes our feelings and opinions from this trip. In the past, I've written trip reports based on a chronological order of events and also based on a logical grouping of categories. Since I still am recovering from my worst case of DIF (Dreaded Island Fever), this report will be a collection of more random thoughts. I hope you enjoy it and will write me back with your thoughts and any questions.

Earlier this year the travel agency that we've used for past trips to the Caribbean let us know about an idea that they came up with in conjunction with the management at Hedonism II - Nude Week I. While nudity is prevalent over part of the resort in normal times, this was going to be an attempt at focusing the week's activities around the guests who enjoy their stay at H-II being nude as much as possible.

Some of the special things done for us included having breakfast available each morning on the nude beach. This was perhaps the most well received event of the week. Many people utilized the availability of the scrambled eggs, bacon, English muffins, fruit, bagels, juice and self-service Bloody Marys and screwdrivers along with the regular coffee, tea, and cakes. It was really enjoyable not having to get dressed for breakfast each morning. Certainly a number of Nude Week guests made their way up to the main dining room for one of Charlie's specially cooked egg breakfasts. This is Charlie's 17th year at H-II and he still fixes the best omelets that I've ever had.

At the other end of the day, there were additional food items available at Robert's McMon grill - usually chicken and fish available jerk style - for dinner if you didn't want to go up to the main dining room. However, I think a large majority of the guests did get up to the main dining room or to the Pastafari restaurant for dinner. It was nice though to have the choice and the availability to stay on the beach if desired. I'll have more on some of the other Nude Week activities later on.

Nude Week was so popular that the resort was sold out. This was good news and bad news. The good news is that the resort had a lot of guests during a normally slower period and we got to make many new friends. The bad news is that the resort had a lot of guests checking in on the same day. Hedonism II's reservations staff still has a ways to go before running an acceptable reservations system. Early this year they changed from an ROH (run of the house) policy where a guest gets their room assigned at check in from the inventory of any available room to a policy where there are different categories of rooms, each with their own price based on location within the resort.

Formerly, if you wanted a room on the nude beach it cost the same as a garden room on the prude side. You didn't know for sure where you'd be until you arrived. If you didn't like your room you could be placed on a room change list for the next day and usually get moved to a location of your liking. Now you can reserve a room on the nude beach, prude beach, or garden area on either side. Of course the nude beach rooms are the most expensive.

H-II overbooked their nude beach rooms. Many people arriving Saturday afternoon had to take rooms in other locations. Understandably this caused much grief from guests who paid up front for a nude beach room and ended up on the prude side. It's difficult to comprehend how a resort who knows they have X number of rooms on the nude beach can book X+ rooms.

We were one of those who didn't get a nude beach room at check in and had paid for one. We were on the nude side in a garden room near the tennis courts. We were told to come back the next morning for a room change and that we'd be compensated for the difference. Well, we showed up at the appointed time the next morning only to be told that our names weren't on the room change list. One nude beach room was going to be available, but it was at the very end behind the dive shack. This was a worse location than our garden room so we elected to stay put one more day. The following day we were moved to 2119, right behind the nude volleyball court - a decent location. Luckily for us the owners of our travel agency, the originators of the Nude Week idea, were at the resort - they had filled close to 200 rooms with their clients. They made sure we got the compensation from Hedonism for our inconvenience prior to our departure and got an excellent room the next morning.

Even though we were a little inconvenienced, it didn't put any damper on our enjoyment. In fact, by the end of the week, most of the guests had forgotten about the earlier problem. I sure do hope that the reservations department can get their act together with this new system before too long. I know that Paulette and her staff were doing their best, but they do need a major shift in their procedures and policies or risk losing the goodwill of their repeat customers. I'm going to keep my eyes and ears open to future reports in this area.

On our first trip to H-II in 1992, we took the bus to and from the MoBay airport. It's a trip that any first time visitor should do at least once. On subsequent trips, though, we've elected to fly between MoBay and Negril. This cuts a 2 hour or so trip down to less than 15 minutes. Previously we've flown on TimAir. This time we tried a new airline, Air Negril, that is sponsored by the SuperClubs organization. Air Negril flies 9 and 5 passenger planes. Air Negril provides the taxi at no cost between the main airline terminal at MoBay and the general aviation terminal. Since we had only carry on bags, it was not long before we cleared Immigrations and Customs and were wisked over to the Air Negril terminal and onto their plane. It took 12 minutes to get to Negril via the shoreline route rather than the over land route. We approached Negril from the north so we didn't get to do the pass over the point of land where H-II and Grand Lido are situated. Being a private pilot, I was wondering about the short field landing capability of the 9 passenger, twin engine plane that we were on. It was fully loaded. No need to worry - the pilot did a superb short field landing and came to a stop without any heavy breaking being required due to the use of reverse pitch on his prop. Anyway, a van was waiting for the short 200 yard drive to H-II. The return trip was just as pleasant. The difference being we were on a fully loaded 5 passenger, single engine plane. This plane had almost a full load of fuel and didn't lift off until the last 100 feet or runway remained. The pilot knew the limitations and had no problem.

Another one of the well received Nude Week activities was morning aerobics in the nude pool. One of the Entertainment Coordinators (EC) were available each morning at 10:00 and over a dozen people participated each day for a 45 minute session. Ann enjoyed this on several mornings.

At this point, I guess I should step back for those who have not been to our Jamaican home before and tell you a little bit about the resort in general. Those of you who have been there many times may want to skip ahead some - I won't be offended if you do <g>.

Hedonism II is located in Negril, Jamaica. It is part of the SuperClub group of resorts and is for adults only. It is at the north end of a 7 mile beach. It shares a point of land with its sister resort Grand Lido and the Point Village complex. There are approximately 22 acrea of land that make up Hedonism II. The beach front is between 1/4 and 1/2 mile long. Being situated on the west end of the island, Negril is a great place to watch beautiful sunsets. A coral reef not far off shore, offers some protection to the beach from the waves. Except during storms, I've never seen any breaking waves inside of the reefs. The reefs also provide some good snorkeling.

Hedonism II has a main building in the middle of the grounds. This building houses the check in lobby, main offices and the main dining room and kitchen. The lobby and dining room are open air with ceiling fans. There are no doors or walls except for separating the kitchen, bathrooms and offices. Immediately adjacent is the Pastafari restaurant. It's in an enclosed building that seats around 50 for a sit down dinner, reservatoins are required. It used to be the old piano bar prior to the opening or Veronica's in late 92 or early 93 (I forget exactly which). Reservations are required for Pastafari. Meals in the main dining room are served buffet style with plenty of selections for everyone's taste. There are a lot of opportunities to experiment with Jamaican dishes. A large bar completes the dining room area.

The main dining room has a stage which is the location for many activities. At lunch each day various friendly contests are held as icebreakers. The participants win tokens which can be exchanged for various prizes like shirts, liquor, and other items. Wednesday was a wet t-shirt contest. The winner won 3 free days at Hedonism II. All the contestants were from the nude beach side and things got pretty wild. During and after dinner there is usually some form of music being played, either recorded or live by the house band. Later each evening there is some other entertainment ranging from various Reggae groups, lounge singers, beach party, and a circus act. Some trapeze equipment is in place in the ceiling over the dance floor and it is used by a couple of different acts. A guest even practiced and performed with the troupe.

Thursday evening is the talent show and Toga party. There was a good amount and quality of guest talent during our visit. It varied from singers, a comedian, musicians, and a female body builder/dancer who ended up dancing nude. The staff has a lot of talent, too, that was on display. Toga night was well attended in costume. Only a few prudes did not wear a toga. There were also some evening guests from a tour bus that were not in costume. There was the normal toga march through the dining room and the judging afterwards. By the way, sheets are provided in your room and toga tying lessons are given. No underwear is allowed. Most of the women from the nude beach group wore very revealing togas. Many had custom made outfits that were very classy looking and well done.

Outside of the dining room is the main pool and small hot tub. The pool is quite large and has a water volleyball net set up. Other than a couple of evenings that saw some nude water volleyball, the pool area is occasionally topless.

Next to the pool is the disco and disco bar. It opens at 11:00 each evening and stays open until 5:00 in the morning. It has a very good sound and light system. I will admit that we don't enjoy the loud, ear-shattering, head-pounding music anymore - but there are many that do and that's ok for them. The disco is used for the Tuesday evening PJ party - "bare as you dare" is the theme. Nude Week's PJ attendees were quite varied and unique in their costumes, or lack of costumes. It was very crowded in the disco that evening since most of the Nude Week guests attended. It was so crowded that it was hard to get out or get to the bar or even dance. Many people left early. The staff did a good job at keeping out those who did not want to participate, but just look. They wouldn't let guys in wearing boxer shorts. After the costume judging, though, it was opened to everyone. I think that they should have considered holding the PJ party in the main dining room due to the large crowds.

Down from the disco is the central beach area. This area contains the outdoor trapeze and trampoline, a bar and grill, a sand volleyball court, the windsurfing, sailing, and kayak equipment. The dive shack is also here where classes are held and snorkel equipment is checked out. There is a pier out into the water to where the snorkel, diving, and water skiing boats dock. They have added peddle boats since our last visit in addition to some larger sailboats. There are some local craftspeople that are allowed to set up displays in this area. They are not allowed to pester people, though. They also do hair braiding there.

Along the beach on either side of the central area are the prude and the nude beaches. The prude beach goes up to Sandals' property - the nude beach goes up to Point Village. The prude beach has a lot of area for sunning. The nude beach has a lot of shade available if desired and also a lot of sunny areas. The addition of a jetty at the Point Village end of the nude beach is a neat improvement. It catches the morning sun before the rest of the nude beach for the early risers. A sign at the point dubs the area "Erection Island".

At the Point Village end of the nude beach is the newly remodeled nude water area. This consists of a bar next to a nice sized pool with a few swim up bar seats. The bar is also accessible from the land side. There are a couple of tables built into the pool for sitting or standing around. Adjacent to the pool is a shallow pool - about 12" deep or so. This pool has a fountain in the middle with a waterfall on one side. Behind the waterfall is a grotto where 6-8 people can comfortably sit. Between the shallow pool and the main pool is a sort of soaking tub. This tub has high pressure air jets, but is not hot like a Jacuzzi. The water overflows from this tub into the main pool. On the other side of the shallow pool is the large hot tub. It is changed some from the old one, but is still in the design of a four leaf clover like the old one. The temperature was kept fairly constant except for one day when it was extra hot. The hot tub saw a lot of use from about 05:00 in the afternoon until well after midnight. A seating area surrounds the pools complete with plenty of chairs.

There has been a lot of work put into cleaning up the bottom of the nude beach area. Each day during our stay had a worker out in the ocean with a leaf rake gathering up the sea grass from the bottom and loading it into a kayak for dumping. He also picked out a lot of the larger rocks. It's still wise to wear water shoes since there are sea urchins in the area that got at least one person.

Next to the bar is a large grill area. Sandwiches and other snacks are available throughout the afternoon and early evening. Many days we ate both lunch and supper here.

Next to the main dining room is Veronica's. This is a combination piano bar, slot machine area, and game room. Lenworth, aka "Ultimate" is still playing strong. I can't believe that a man with his talent on the keyboards is still a resort piano player. He has a talent for working the crowd and getting people to join in on the vocals. Song books are provided. He can play any song in any key after hearing only one verse and chorus. By the end of May, he's supposed to have a new piano. On the nights he's off, there is a Karaoke machine that gets used. There was a surprising large number of very talented guest singers during the week. Lenworth's brother and his wife were present one evening. They were in town for Mother's Day.

Outside of Veronicas is a large courtyard. In the middle is a lawn chess board. The pieces are about 3 feet high and the squares about 2 feet on a side. Surrounding the other sides of the courtyard are the weightrooms, ping pong area, and the shops. The shops accept US dollars and credit cards. The weight room has some older Universal type equipment and a lot of free weights.

Next to this area are the tennis courts. They are lighted and lessons are available. There are weekly tournaments for those inclined. In this same area are the basketball court and the shuffleboard court.

Way in the back are the air conditioned indoor squash courts. I've been there once or twice, but have not seen anyone play.

The rest of the property contains the two story room buildings and acres of trees, bushes, flowers and other flora. In the nude garden area is a large aviary containing several dozen birds. They are always singing in the morning.

I think that pretty well completes the dollar tour of the resort, Oh yea, I did leave out a couple of things I just thought of. An interesting feature is the boats from the other resorts that always seem to break down just off the nude beach. Also, the skippers of the kayaks and sailboats from the other resorts seem to loose control of their crafts and end up in the nude swimming area. Then there's the local entrepreneurs who approach the beach areas selling everything from rides to fishing to illegal drugs. They are easily ignored.

As we arrived at the lobby to check in someone came up behind me and asked if I was Denny from Omaha form the Internet. I hesitated before admitting it to determine if I was in any danger <g> before saying yes. It was Mike and Janet from Austin introducing themselves. We had a couple of cyberspace discussions prior to the trip. During the week, I met many other online comrades - some that were active participants and some that were just lurkers. At the Negril Aerodrome while waiting for our return flight, I met a gentleman from Belgium that had read many of my messages. It was kind of neat understanding what this electronic medium has meant to making new friends from all over.

I guess the biggest surprise took place at the new bar on the nude beach. When I walked up to get my first drink, Delroy the bartender was all the way over on the pool end of the bar. As I got my drinks and was leaving the bar, Delroy shouted out, "Hi, Denny!". I was floored that he remembered me from 4 years ago. I did neglect to ask him what ever happened to the old Prodigy and CompuServe scrapbooks that he had at the old bar. By the way, the old bar is used for storage at this time. There is a soft drink and water dispenser there. It useful when it's kept stocked with ice and cups.

After hearing some bad stories about the towel exchange, I was pleasantly surprised at how well it went off. Of course there were never enough at the nude hot tub, but during the day it was easy to exchange them at the dive shack. The maids also left clean beach towels in the room each day. It was not a problem for us.

Speaking about the rooms, there were many changes since our last trip. There are now phones in the rooms. Negril has also updated their phone system so that it is now pretty easy to call the states and use a Visa or Master Card for the charges. The phone was also useful for wake up calls on departure day, if needed. Jacks for cable TV were evident and will probably be a future enhancement at some time. There is also a clock radio in the room. While time is not all that important while at H-II, it was helpful to know if I was waking up at 4, 5, or 6 am without having to grab my watch and go into the bathroom to turn on the light so as not to bother Ann's sleep. We also didn't experience too much problem with hot water. The pressure was not real heavy (this is Jamaica), but the water was warm enough - but not hot - for showering in the mornings and late afternoons. There are irons and ironing boards in the rooms. I don't think they got used much. There are also coffee makers and a stock of coffee in the rooms. There are new tile floors. The safes in the closet are still there. Laundry service is available at an extra charge (seems like an anomaly for Nude Week, though).

Another surprise was to see someone in the hot tub that I thought I recognized from our last trip, but couldn't remember a name. I walked over to him and said that he looked familiar and I asked him if he was from Maryland and owned a few grocery stores and was there in 93. He said that he was. He told me his name and mentioned that he was thinking the we looked familiar too. Small world....

There was another first during Nude Week. The weekly returnee's party was held in Kevin Levy's (the General Manager) backyard and was clothing optional. There was plenty of food, drink, and good service as usual. The only drawback was a lack of seating area. The free week for the returnee with the most trips was won by a person with 15 weeks (if I remember right). There was someone there for their 68th time, but he had previously won. There was a large number of returnees around 10-15 years. I guess that goes to show how much people really think of Hedonism II and how it is a home for many.

Another one of the special events was a shaving cream body decorating session. This event was organized by a group called "Biff's Bunch" who visit each year, sponsored this event. We put shaving cream on in some very unique ways. One of the Entertainment Coordinators then led us on a march to the prude beach. We then marched through the main dining room and even some went into the main offices. We were looking for Kevin or Joe Smith, the Resident Manager. Kevin was out of town and when Joe saw us coming, he took off running. After we got to the lobby, Michael the EC, said, "let's go over to Grand Lido". So over 50 of us, nude except for some shaving cream (that was starting to drop off and leave a trail), marched off chanting various Hedonism chants. We proudly marched pass the gates, through the Grand Lido's grand lobby, into their main dining room and took over the stage. We chanted some more and taunted some of the crowd. We then marched off to the nude beach where we invited the crowd there to join us. No one did (not surprisingly <g>) and so we hit them with shaving cream from extra cans that we had. We marched back to H-II leaving a trail of cream on the foliage that we passed. Once back at H-II Michael said we were going over to Sandals - so off we went. We marched along their beach again attacking with shaving cream. We went through their pool area where we woke up a lot of people <g> with our singing. There were a bunch of surprised faces. We marched up to the entrance of their main building. We were turned back by security. By then we needed a drink anyway so we left Sandals, but not before washing the shaving cream off on their beach. I wished that we had thought of jumping into their pool to wash off. It would probably be the first time someone was nude in their pool <vbg>.

A bandstand was set up on the nude beach where live entertainment was provided most afternoons or evenings. It was also the location for the nude body painting contest. There were a lot of very creative and artistic paintings - not to mention some great looking canvases <g>! Gallon jugs of paint were made available with plenty of brushes. A lot of effort went into many of the works of art.

There was a bikini stuffing contest at the nude pool several of the afternoons. The object was to see how many ping pong balls one person could stuff into another person's bikini. The EC doing the judging had a lot of fun removing the ping pong balls to count them.

Another even was a nude fashion show - sounds odd, doesn't it! The catch here was that the "costumes" had to be made out of natural material like leaves, stems, vines and flowers (only using what was already off of the trees and bushes). String and paper clips were allowed for fasteners. The winners got their departure tax paid by Go Classy Tours.

GCT also sponsored a couple of other contests like who had the lightest luggage, who gained the most weight, who came the farthest (Kuwait won), and more. It provided for more fun and enjoyment.

One of the interesting activities run by the H-II EC staff was a strange sort of scavenger hunt. One evening after dinner while the band was setting up for the beach party, tables were assigned numbers. One of the coordinators then asked for people to come forward who had various items or characteristics. The first table with a person to come down to the stage got some points. Additionally, if a person from another table would touch the first person, that table also got points. Some of the things asked for were: a person with a pierced nipple, person with the hairiest chest, person with the largest breasts, person with the reddest hair, and so on - you get the idea! Of course you had to show the judges that you had what they wanted.

One night had the 60s dance contest on the main floor after dinner. There were many good dancers. My favorite was the couple where the lady tossed her top into the crowd (all right so I am a dirty old man <g>).

Many people who are planning a first visit to H-II ask what the crowd is like. Nude Week had more couples than on the average, and most of them hung out (no pun) on the nude beach and participated in the Nude Week activities. The average age of the couples was about 40. There were also several single nude guests. The prude singles seemed abnormally well behaved. The single males did outnumber the single women as is typically the case. By the middle of the week, many of the single women came over to the nude beach to "escape" the single guys. They ended up topless or nude after a short time of getting comfortable with the idea. I'm sure they also felt out of place with a swim suit on. The security staff on the beach did an excellent job of keeping the "lookers" out of the way on the nude beach. There were also not very many beach walkers from other resorts. Point Village looked deserted and Sandals appeared to have their typical honeymoon and travel agent crowd in attendance and was quiet after 10 pm.

Another thing first timers seem to worry about is that they are too young, too old, too fat, too skinny, too bald, too ugly, too hairy, too shy, too anything else to fit into the nude beach crowd. This crowd was an excellent example of how varied the make up of the crowd generally is - physically speaking. I fit into most of the categories above myself <g>. There was at least one woman there with a mastectomy. There were people with physical handicaps. There were people over 70 years old and people around 20. There were people of many nationalities and races. It is a true melting pot. No one should worry about "fitting in" or being judged negatively because of their looks or possible handicaps. The people that we've met over the years on the nude beach at H-II have been some of the nicest and warmest people we've ever met.

For those first timers who would feel more at home on the prude beach, don't let me make that sound too negative. We walked over to the prude beach a couple of times and I sat around there while waiting for snorkeling trips. The crowd there was obviously much younger - averaging around 25, with most of them singles. Surprisingly, there were a number of topless women on the prude beach. It's allowed (by the prude pool and hot tub, too), but not seen too often. In general, though, even though you don't have to participate in any form of nudity to enjoy Hedonism II, you will undoubtedly be exposed <g> to some level of nudity. So if that would offend you, you probably should consider one of the other SuperClubs.

Another thing asked a lot by first timers is what to bring. A lot of it really depends on your style and preferences. On one end of the scale are those who plan to spend a lot of time nude. We're in this group. With breakfast available on the nude beach, many days we went to 7 pm before getting dressed and were back in the nude hot tub by midnight. For us, we took a few shirts and a pair of shorts for going into town. I wore gym trunks (reversible for a change of colors <g>) to dinner. Ann wore a short flowered wrap with see through tops to dinner. She rotated these and wore them each twice. I had a swim suit for snorkeling trips, but it never got wet! Ann had a bikini, but only wore the bottoms during walks along the beach over to the prude area. Other people will bring more sporty clothes for evening wear. Many women had nice tropical style dresses. There was a lot of sheer tops on display. Add a pair of sandals, some toiletries, plenty of sun screen and some books rounded out our packing. One carryon bag each did the trick. I've seen other couples come with 4 or 5 suitcases for the week. We prefer to travel light. Don't forget something to wear on the trip back. We also packed a couple of inflatable rafts, cameras and film, water shoes, hats (I wore a big straw one to cover the spots where my hair is bailing out), and drinking containers to fill at the bar with ice water or other libations.

Another common question is what does "all -inclusive" really mean. It's easier to say what is not covered - departure tax ($15 per person), souvenirs, outside tours and entertainment like parasailing and the catamaran cruise (nude or textile cruises available), laundry service and massages. Covered is all food (meals and snacks), all bar drinks at all times as much as you want (don't get carried away or you'll get end up losing a day or more), all on premise entertainment, all on premise sports, daily housekeeping service, ground transportation to/from the Montego Bay airport, and unlimited fun. No tipping is expected or allowed.

Hedonism II can be a wonderful place to visit for many people. For the people wanting to relax, the sand gravity on the H-II is the strongest of any place in the Caribbean. I had time to read 3 novels during our week. Those who like to party will find things like the disco and beach parties to their liking. Water enthusiasts can scuba, snorkel, waterski, sail, windsurf and kayak - lessons available for all at no cost. Sportsmen and women can play tennis (free lessons), basketball, volleyball, shuffleboard, and squash. Hardbodies like me <g> can work out in the gym and run along the beach. There's much more and there's also plenty of time to do nothing.

If I missed anything important to you, please write. I love sharing our Hedonism II experiences and especially enjoy helping making a first time Hedonist our of people. Also write me for travel planning assistance. I can set you up with great service and pricing through the agency we use - Go Classy Tours. They've been good to us over the years and have always given a little extra effort to our friends. This would pertain to any travel information you might need. They specialize in the Caribbean and regularly visit all the major resorts and have first hand information. Drop me a line for any information you need. Include your name and location.

Nude Week 1 was so successful that Nude Week 2 has been scheduled for September 13-20. If you are interested in sharing this experience, let me know right away. Rooms are going fast! There are real discounts available for early booking for this or other Caribbean destinations.

We're already reliving our trip through our pictures and shared email with our fellow guests. If you're already a Hedonist, you know what I mean. If not, consider joining our ranks. If we can answer any questions for you, please write. I promise an answer as soon as I can.

I'm still recovering from DIF and rum withdrawal <g>. It was a week of fun, friends, and fantastic freedom from the cares of everyday life. I can only hope to share the experience with each of you sometime in the near future in person.

Thanks for staying with this long report. I hope it was useful, somewhat entertaining, and is causing you to daydream of sitting on the beach, looking at a beautiful sunset with someone special, sipping a Dirty Banana, and listening to beach songs. That's where I'm off too right now. See ya!

Denny Pasternak